Being truly happy in a relationship is not about luck, it’s about setting boundaries for unacceptable behavior.
This isn’t about control or making demands. It’s about understanding what contributes to your happiness and well-being in a relationship.
Happy people know that certain behaviors are toxic to their peace and joy. They choose not to tolerate these behaviors because they value their happiness above all else.
In this article, we’ll explore the 9 behaviors that people who are truly happy never tolerate in relationships. These insights might help you realize what could be holding back your own happiness.
1) Dishonesty
Honesty is the foundation stone of every healthy relationship.
Truly happy people understand this. They value truth and transparency above all else, even when the truth is uncomfortable or inconvenient.
They know that lies, even small ones, can create cracks in a relationship that over time can become unbridgeable chasms.
Dishonesty breeds mistrust, and where there is mistrust, there can be no true happiness. Therefore, people who are truly happy never tolerate dishonesty in their relationships.
This might seem like a hard line to take, but remember – it’s not about being harsh or unforgiving. It’s about valuing your own happiness and well-being enough to demand honesty from your partner.
And guess what? The happiest relationships are those where both partners feel safe enough to be completely honest with each other.
2) Lack of respect
Respect is essential in any relationship, and people who are truly happy never settle for anything less.
I have personally learned this lesson in my own relationships. A few years back, I was dating someone who used to belittle my career choices. It started subtly, with little jabs here and there. I brushed it off, thinking it wasn’t a big deal.
But over time, these small jabs turned into outright disrespect. It began to affect my self-esteem and happiness. I realized that I deserved better – that everyone does.
I ended that relationship and took away a crucial lesson: Never tolerate disrespect in a relationship.
Happy people understand this. They know that respect is not just about big things like career choices or personal values; it’s also about small things like listening when your partner is speaking and valuing their opinions.
In the end, a relationship without respect is not a relationship worth having. And people who value their happiness know this all too well.
3) Neglect
Neglect, in any form, can be a silent killer in relationships.
Relationships require constant nourishment and attention, much like a plant. If you stop watering a plant, it withers and dies. Similarly, a relationship can’t thrive without attention and care.
A study published in the Journal of Family Psychology found that neglect is just as harmful as active mistreatment in relationships. It corrodes the bond between partners and leads to feelings of loneliness and dissatisfaction.
People who are truly happy never tolerate neglect. They understand that a thriving relationship needs consistent effort, attention, and nurturing. They strive to make their partner feel valued and loved, and expect the same in return.
4) Emotional manipulation
Emotional manipulation in a relationship is a definite no-go for truly happy people.
They understand that love isn’t about controlling the other person or using their feelings against them. It’s about emotional support, understanding, and mutual growth.
Emotional manipulation can take many forms – guilt-tripping, gaslighting, silent treatment, or playing the victim. These behaviors are all signs of an unhealthy dynamic.
Happy people recognize these red flags and refuse to entertain them. They value their emotional health and believe in creating a relationship environment where both partners feel safe, respected, and free to express their feelings without fear of manipulation.
5) Financial abuse
Finances can be a tricky subject in relationships, but one thing is clear – financial abuse is never acceptable.
People who are truly happy in their relationships understand the importance of financial independence and respect. They don’t tolerate behaviors such as controlling spending, withholding money, or using finances as a tool for control.
They believe in open and honest discussions about money and make financial decisions together as a team. They know that financial abuse can lead to feelings of entrapment and disempowerment, which are far from conducive to happiness.
In short, happy people know their worth and refuse to allow financial abuse to undermine their peace of mind and relationship satisfaction.
6) Constant criticism
Constructive criticism is one thing, but constant, unrelenting criticism can be truly damaging to a person’s self-esteem and happiness.
People who are genuinely content in their relationships know that everyone is human and makes mistakes. They understand that continuous criticism does not encourage growth, but rather, breeds resentment and self-doubt.
They choose to focus on the positive aspects of their partner, celebrating their strengths rather than magnifying their flaws. They believe in lifting each other up, not tearing each other down.
In a truly happy relationship, both partners feel valued and appreciated for who they are, imperfections and all. They know that it’s easier to grow together when they’re standing on a foundation of acceptance and appreciation, rather than one of constant criticism.
7) Breach of trust
Trust is like a piece of paper; once it’s crumpled, it can never be perfect again.
I learned this the hard way when a close friend betrayed my trust. I had confided in her about a sensitive issue, and she shared it with others. It hurt deeply and the friendship was never the same.
And it’s not any different in romantic relationships. Trust is the bedrock of a strong, healthy relationship. Breaches of trust, like infidelity or betrayal, can cause deep wounds that take time and effort to heal.
People who are truly happy in their relationships understand this and treat trust with the respect it deserves. They know that trust isn’t just about fidelity; it’s about keeping promises, being reliable, and showing up when your partner needs you.
They believe in creating a safe space where both partners can be vulnerable without fear of betrayal. After all, a relationship without trust is like a car without gas; you can stay in it as long as you want, but it won’t go anywhere.
8) Lack of communication
Communication is the lifeblood of any relationship. Without it, misunderstandings can quickly escalate, and feelings can get hurt.
People who are truly happy in their relationships understand the importance of clear, open, and honest communication. They don’t tolerate behaviors like silent treatment or passive-aggressive comments.
They believe in expressing their feelings and needs openly, and they encourage their partners to do the same. They understand that sometimes, hard conversations need to be had for the health of the relationship.
In a truly happy relationship, both partners feel heard and understood. They know that effective communication is not just about talking, but also about listening with empathy and understanding.
9) Absence of mutual respect and equality
In the end, it all comes down to mutual respect and equality.
Truly happy people understand that a relationship is a partnership. They don’t tolerate any form of disrespect or inequality – be it in decision-making, distribution of chores, or emotional support.
They believe in sharing responsibilities, listening to each other’s opinions, and making decisions together. They know that a relationship is about give and take, and they strive to maintain a balance.
In a truly happy relationship, both partners feel valued and equal. They don’t just love each other; they respect each other. And that, in essence, is the cornerstone of a genuinely happy and fulfilling relationship.
Final thoughts: It’s all about self-love
The journey towards a happy and fulfilling relationship often begins with self-love.
Self-love sets the foundation for how we allow others to treat us. It helps us set boundaries, assert our needs, and walk away from situations that threaten our peace and happiness.
A study published in the Journal of Happiness Studies found a strong correlation between self-love and happiness in relationships. The more we value ourselves, the less likely we are to tolerate behaviors that undermine our well-being.
Whether it’s dishonesty, lack of respect, neglect, emotional manipulation, financial abuse, constant criticism, breach of trust, lack of communication, or absence of mutual respect and equality – people who love themselves refuse to accept these behaviors in their relationships.
So, as we navigate the complex landscape of human relationships, let’s remember to love ourselves first. Let’s remember that we deserve respect, honesty, trust, communication and equality. Let’s remember that our happiness matters.
In the end, the key to a truly happy relationship might be as simple as treating ourselves with the same kindness and respect that we expect from others.