“I’m bored”, I used to repeatedly say to my mom as a kid. Understandably, she’d get pretty mad about it.
“Then find something to entertain yourself!”, she’d say, somewhat exasperated (OK, a lot exasperated!).
But did I? No, I didn’t.
Because like most kids, I had certain character traits that meant I couldn’t help but feel bored all the time.
Luckily, I grew out of those the older I got. But not everybody does.
Some people feel bored all the time and continue to complain about it way into their adult life! These kinds of people have certain traits, like the following 8.
1) They lack appreciation for life
When you look for it, there’s beauty everywhere in life. Even when commuting to work, a nice tree or the café server could make your day if you let it.
On some days, it’s harder to appreciate your life the way it is. Like if there’s more bad than good on the horizon or if you’re struggling with the thoughts inside your head.
But even on those hard days, if you really take time to look, you’ll find at least a few things in your life that are worth appreciating.
Some people struggle to look for these things. They lack the motivation or even the interest to see the good in life. Taking a moment to say, “I really appreciate that” just doesn’t cross their mind.
These types of people often struggle with boredom – and it stems from how they don’t really know what they’ve got or appreciate it.
2) They struggle with self-awareness
Feeling bored isn’t an emotion. It’s a state. Often, the emotion you’re feeling behind the boredom is quite different.
Like if you’re bored at the party, you might actually be feeling left out or anxious about socializing with people you don’t know. Or if you agree to attend a yoga class with a friend. You’ve gone to please them, but yoga actually isn’t your thing.
You think you’re bored (and say as much), but you’re really just annoyed that your people-pleasing has led you to do something you don’t want to do again!
When you have self-awareness, you can better recognize the real emotions you’re feeling. In turn, this helps you do something about it.
Like give yourself a positive pep talk to feel less anxious or try to find someone to talk to at the party. Or, of course, say no to things you don’t really want to do…
3) They feel “destined” for more
It isn’t a bad thing to believe in yourself and want good things for your life. But there’s a fine line between being ambitious and being a little arrogant…
Let me explain. Say you work in a library and your dream is to work in publishing. You make the most of your time at the library, but when you get home, you apply for the jobs you want because you feel ready to progress. That’s being ambitious.
But let’s look at the above scenario differently. Say you work in a library and want to work in publishing, so you complain about how boring your job is.
You tell everyone you’re better than working at the library and look down on your colleagues. You say you’re going to “make it out of here one day”, even though you’re doing absolutely nothing to achieve that. That’s arrogance.
People who act this way, always believing they’re “destined for more”, often feel unsatisfied with their life – no matter what they do to change things. Even if they end up with that dream job in publishing!
4) They don’t like hard work
Does anyone enjoy working hard? I’m not sure they do.
But from experience, I know it feels good when you reap the rewards AFTER the hard work you’ve put in!
The thought of the reward at the end of it all can be the motivation a person needs to work hard for what they want. Yet not everyone feels this way.
Hard work is just that: hard work. It’s tedious, exhausting, and (of course) boring. Whenever the opportunity to work hard crops up, people who often feel bored in life avoid it at all costs.
They don’t see it as an opportunity or a chance to feel good about something in the end. They see it as boring, boring, boring!
5) They lack creativity
When you think of a creative person, what do you imagine? I’ll bet it’s someone who paints at the weekend, writes poetry, visits art galleries, and is always making something, right?
Sure, those things and people are creative, but that isn’t just what being creative is about! Creativity is also about what you choose to do with your everyday life.
One person who’s delayed at the airport might sit around complaining about it and repeatedly saying how bored they are.
Another might use the time to strike up a conversation with strangers, make origami out of their flight itinerary, or practice writing with their left hand.
When you look at it this way, of course, the first person is bored; they aren’t being creative with their time!
People who feel bored all the time are exactly the same. They lack the imagination to create something out of nothing.
6) They wallow in bad situations
Sometimes, you really have to make the best of a bad situation! Like if you’re at a bar for a friend’s birthday and it’s totally empty all night long.
Sure, you could sit around and complain about how bored you are (also known as wallowing). Or you could make light of it all and try to have a good time regardless!
You could vacate to the dancefloor and claim it for just your friends. You could think up a game that everyone could play to bring some excitement to the table. Or you could just keep your spirits high, laughing and chatting away.
When you get bored with everything in life, you probably aren’t making the best of what you have. You aren’t appreciating the experiences you have or the friends you’re with.
You’re kind of giving up. You’re letting other people control how you feel and how much of a good time you have, not you.
7) They have a negative outlook on life
Speaking of making the best of things, people who are always bored in life aren’t very good at being positive, either!
When something goes “wrong”, they’re quick to brand it as such and let it seep into everything.
A friend of mine was out of work for a long time for this exact reason. She didn’t enjoy her job so applied for a couple of new roles one evening. When the rejections came rolling in that weekend, what did she do?
She never applied for another job again! Because she faced rejection that one time, she had a completely negative view of applying for jobs.
“What’s the point?”, she’d say whenever anyone asked her if she was still looking for work elsewhere. When really, there was a lot of point to it!
If you have a negative outlook like this, especially when it comes to changing your life, rejection will knock you down a lot harder than if you think more positively.
8) They’re stubborn and rarely change their mind
Changing your mind is often branded as a bad thing. And I get it – being indecisive isn’t always a good trait to have.
But in actual fact, changing your mind can be a brilliant thing. It shows growth and maturity. It means you’ve learned something and you’re courageous enough to say with confidence, “I was wrong and I’ve changed my mind!”.
But people who feel bored all the time don’t ever act this way – and they certainly don’t see it as a “good” way to be!
They think changing your mind is uncool and even weak. They’re also just a bit stubborn, so admitting they were quick to judge something doesn’t come naturally to them.
Like if they’ve just started a new class and aren’t immediately stimulated by the curriculum. Instead of giving it time to see if things get better, they brand the class as “boring”.
When the class gets interesting, they don’t change their mind. They stick with what they originally said – even if they don’t believe it themselves anymore!
They’re too stubborn and they have way too much pride to ever do that. So, they suffer – or, at least, they continue to act like they do…
Final thoughts
When I think back to all those times I felt bored as a kid, complaining away to my mom about it, it’s pretty awful.
There was so much more I could have done with my time if I knew how. There was so much I could’ve stopped to appreciate!
Of course, I was just a kid and you can’t help the way you are when you’re young.
But as an adult, you can help it. If you often feel bored in life, you might recognize these traits in yourself. And maybe, doing the opposite could be just what you need to turn things around and start truly appreciating your life again!