People who lack self-confidence often display these 11 traits

Ever had a moment when your heart was racing, your voice was shaky, and you felt like a deer caught in the headlights?

That’s what we’re going to talk about today – a lack of self-confidence.

Some folks might think it’s not a big deal.

But it’s more than just being a little shy or nervous.

Not having enough confidence can stop us from doing our best. It can make us question if we’re good enough or capable enough.

But how can we tell if someone lacks confidence?

You’re in the right place to find out!

We’re going to share 11 common signs that people with low self-confidence show.

And don’t worry, realizing these signs is the first step towards feeling better about ourselves.

1. They’re Constantly Apologizing

First off, folks who lack self-confidence often feel as if they’re always in the wrong.

They’re like living, breathing apology machines.

You’ll notice them saying “sorry” for things that aren’t their fault or even for things that don’t require an apology.

For example, they might apologize for asking a question or for expressing an opinion.

This constant need to apologize stems from a fear of offending others or being seen as a burden.

Of course, it’s important to apologize when we mess up, but overdoing it can be a sign of low self-confidence.

2. They Avoid Eye Contact

When people feel unsure of themselves, they often find it hard to maintain eye contact during a conversation.

They might look down, to the side, or anywhere but directly at the person they’re talking to.

This is because direct eye contact can feel too intimate or assertive for them.

It’s like they’re trying to take up as little space as possible, even in someone else’s field of vision.

If you notice someone frequently looking away during a chat, it could be a sign that they’re wrestling with self-confidence issues.

3. They Overthink and Second-Guess Themselves

Another sign is overthinking and constantly second-guessing oneself.

I’ll share a personal example of this.

I remember when I was in a team project at work. We were brainstorming ideas and I had a suggestion that I thought could really help us.

But instead of speaking up, I kept silent, second-guessing my idea. I thought, “What if it’s not good enough?” or “What if they laugh?”

That’s a classic sign of low self-confidence – the fear of being judged or rejected can make us overthink and doubt our own ideas or decisions.

4. They Struggle to Accept Compliments

People who lack self-confidence often find it really hard to accept compliments.

You might think that compliments would boost their spirits, right?

But oddly enough, it’s often the opposite.

When they receive a compliment, they’re likely to brush it off or downplay their achievements.

This is because they may see compliments as insincere or believe they don’t deserve them.

People with low self-esteem feel uncomfortable when they get compliments because it conflicts with their self-image.

So instead of accepting the praise, they deflect it.

5. They Tend to be Perfectionists

Another trait that people who lack self-confidence often show is perfectionism.

It’s like they’re in a constant battle with themselves, trying to get every little thing just right.

They believe that anything less than perfect is a failure, which can be incredibly draining.

For example, imagine a talented artist who spends hours and hours on a piece, never quite satisfied with their work.

They keep tweaking and adjusting, always finding something that could be “better.”

The piece might already be beautiful in the eyes of others, but for them, it’s never good enough.

This endless pursuit of perfection stems from a fear of criticism or not being good enough.

It’s heartbreaking because it can stop them from recognizing and celebrating their own progress or achievements.

Remember, nobody’s perfect and it’s our imperfections that make us unique and human.

6. They Frequently Compare Themselves to Others

People with low self-confidence, like myself at one point, often have a habit of comparing themselves to others.

I remember scrolling through social media platforms and feeling a pang of envy each time I saw someone’s success story, amazing vacation, or perfect family pictures.

I’d find myself thinking, “Why can’t my life be like that?” or “Why am I not as successful as them?”

This constant comparison can become a vicious cycle, making us feel worse about ourselves.

It’s important to remember that people usually only share their best moments on social media.

Everyone has ups and downs; they just might not broadcast them.

It took me some time to realize that the only person I should compare myself to is the person I was yesterday, and strive to be a better version of myself every day.

7. They’re Always Backing Down

People who lack self-confidence often back down easily, even when they know they’re right.

It’s as if they’ve got this voice inside their head constantly saying, “You’re wrong. They’re right. Just let it go.”

Picture this: you’re in a debate, you know your facts are solid and your argument is strong.

But the moment someone opposes you, you back down.

You start doubting yourself, thinking maybe they know better.

You feel like your points are worthless and choose to stay silent rather than stand your ground.

This happens because folks with low self-confidence often underestimate their worth or knowledge.

They fear being judged or criticized more than they trust their own abilities.

It’s a tough spot to be in, but recognizing this trait can be the first step towards finding your voice and believing in your worth.

8. They Struggle with Decision Making

Did you know that struggling with decision making is a common trait among people who lack self-confidence?

People with low self-confidence often struggle to make decisions because they fear making mistakes or facing the consequences of a wrong decision.

Whether it’s deciding what to wear, choosing a meal from a menu, or making bigger life decisions like choosing a career path, they often second-guess their choices or avoid making decisions altogether.

They might frequently ask others for their opinions or approval as they doubt their own judgment.

Remember, it’s okay to make mistakes – they’re part of learning and growth.

9. They Fear New Experiences

People who lack self-confidence, like I once did, often fear new experiences or stepping out of their comfort zone.

I remember when I was offered a chance to learn a new skill or try a new hobby, I often found myself saying, “No, thanks. I don’t think I’d be good at it.”

It was like a wall of fear holding me back, making me stick to the familiar and the comfortable.

This fear stemmed from a lack of confidence in my ability to learn new things or adapt to new situations.

Over time, I realized that growth often happens outside our comfort zone, and we won’t know what we’re capable of unless we try.

It’s okay to be a beginner and it’s okay to make mistakes – that’s how we learn and grow.

10. They Neglect Self-Care

People who lack self-confidence often neglect self-care. It’s like they’re so busy doubting themselves, comparing themselves to others and trying to be perfect, they forget the most important person – themselves.

They might skip meals, forget to hydrate, or skimp on sleep because they don’t think they’re worth the effort or because they’re too caught up in their worries.

They might stop doing things they love or that make them happy because they feel they don’t deserve it or there are ‘more important’ things to worry about.

The truth is, self-care isn’t selfish or a waste of time. It’s necessary. It’s replenishing. And everyone deserves it.

11. They Hide their True Selves

Last but not least, folks with low self-confidence often hide their true selves.

It’s like they’re wearing a mask, pretending to be someone they’re not, because they fear that their real self isn’t good enough.

They might agree with others even when they hold a different opinion, or pretend to enjoy something they actually dislike.

It’s heartbreaking, really. They’re denying the world the chance to know the wonderful, unique individual that they are.

Remember, every one of us is unique and we all have something special to offer.

Embracing our true selves, with all our quirks and flaws, is a big step towards building self-confidence.

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Picture of Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the editor of Ideapod and founder of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 6 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. If you to want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter or Facebook.

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