When you feel like the world is going to collapse around you, and nothing is ever going to be good enough for anyone, it’s difficult not to blame yourself. It’s hard not to think that something is wrong with you, that no matter what you do, it won’t ever be enough.
This may sound familiar if you’ve been feeling this way for a long time. It can be hard to focus because all you can think about are your mistakes and inadequacies. Here are the reasons for thinking this way!
1) You are probably a perfectionist
Perfectionism is “a desire to achieve perfection or superiority in all things.” So you not only want to be the best you can be but also want others to see that you are the best at what you do.
You expect nothing less than excellence from yourself, and when it doesn’t happen, it’s because of lack of effort on your part, lack of interest in the task—or both. If you have noticed this trait of personality in yourself, it’s probably time to change your thoughts about yourself and give some slack to people around you.
Perfectionism is often accompanied by loneliness and a general feeling of hopelessness. When you are surrounded by people but feel like no one understands you, it’s hard to see any reason for living.
Anyone with perfectionistic tendencies may feel overwhelmed. They may have plans for the future but never do anything about them because they’re too scared to fail or not be perfect.
On the other hand, there are those who are successful but find themselves unhappy and unfulfilled at the same time. Whining and complaining, finding fault in others and in all circumstances except your own—this is what perfectionism does to you.
When you can’t focus because all you can think about is the fact that everyone else is “outperforming” you, it’s hard not to feel like a failure.
2) You may be suffering from depression and a lack of energy
Many people who are perfectionists and also think they aren’t good enough end up depressed. The most likely reason is that they have been thinking negative thoughts about themselves for so long, they begin to think that their world will never change, that nothing can make them feel better and more optimistic.
A lot of people in this situation begin to suffer from reduced energy—they simply don’t have any strength or desire left in them to do anything. If you are thinking this way, it might be a good idea to seek professional help from a licensed therapist.
3) You’re telling yourself you aren’t good enough
If you are blaming yourself for thinking nothing is good enough, you have taken the first step towards making a change. Accepting compliments on your good work and achievement will help you stop the negative thinking and start seeing yourself as a success.
You are in your comfort zone, afraid of moving forward. Even though you may have dreams of being great, there are still many things you have to accomplish just to be a “regular person.”
You are afraid to leave your comfort zone and face these things. Fearful of failing, you hold back and stay in your comfort zone.
This is a mistake that often prevents people from reaching their full potential. You’re probably afraid of success, but even more so, you’re afraid of failure.
If you are afraid to lose what you have now by making big changes in your life, then nothing will change because you will never do it. This is a mistake that often prevents people from achieving their goals and finding happiness in life.
If you are afraid of change, then your life will remain the same. If you want to succeed but fear failure, then wait until you fail.
If you try something and fail, it won’t kill you. You could get a job and fail at it, but who cares?
Get another job and do better! The only way to achieve your goals is to be willing to take risks on a regular basis.
You will never achieve anything if you are afraid of the possibility of failure.
Now you might be wondering how you can change and allow yourself to realize that you’re indeed good enough.
Well, my advice here would be to begin with yourself.
Seriously, stop searching for external fixes to sort out your life. Deep down, you know this isn’t working.
Instead, why won’t you focus on building a healthy relationship with yourself and unleashing your personal power?
This is something I learned after watching this excellent free video from the shaman Rudá Iandê. His unique approach was a turning point in my life that helped me to overcome my limiting beliefs and achieve whatever I desired in life.
So stop telling yourself you’re not good enough and watch this inspiring video to build a better relationship with yourself and unlock your endless potential.
Here’s a link to the free video again.
4) You are too sensitive about things that don’t even matter
Perfectionism can make the smallest of things seem like the worst mistake ever and annoy those around you. You are very demanding about yourself and others.
If you are not good enough (at least in your own eyes), it may not seem like a good idea to talk to anyone about it. If you find that you aren’t able to do everything perfectly, then why should anyone expect it from you?
And if you try to talk to someone else about it, you probably believe they won’t listen or give advice because they think, “how bad could it be if you’re still alive?” Even if you try to focus on big, important things in your life, it’s hard to do that when you feel like you’re failing at everything and no one cares.
Being so focused on yourself and your own needs, you can end up missing out and not enjoying life as much as everyone else. You will probably find yourself spending more time thinking and less time doing things that would make you happy—such as hanging out with friends or doing activities that make you feel good about yourself.
When you are so focused on being perfect, it’s hard to focus on the things that matter. A lot of time spent thinking about how others view you and what is wrong with you is time wasted.
Wouldn’t it be better to spend some time and look at the things that matter, like getting a degree or getting yourself a job? And even after you get those little pieces of paper, it shouldn’t stop there.
The only way to get anywhere in life is by loving what you do and trying harder every day.
5) You have unrealistic expectations of yourself and others
Your expectations are set too high and are unrealistic. You may want to be a CEO or president of a company, but you don’t understand that it takes a lot of hard work to get there.
Though you might not know it, many people set their goals too high and never achieve them because they don’t believe they can. It’s time to lower your expectations so you can enjoy what you have right now.
Don’t set your goals too high and then get disappointed later. You only see what you want to see.
If you are constantly focusing on the things that are wrong, you will never enjoy the things that are right in front of you. People who complain have a selective vision, choosing to focus on all the negative things over the positives that surround them.
When you find yourself in this situation, take a look at your thoughts and let go of some of those negative ones. If you are constantly comparing yourself to others, it is time to stop and focus on your values and what you have to offer to the world.
We are all different, so comparing yourself to others is not the right thing to do. You have your own unique personality, and that is what makes you special.
Only your close friends and family will understand your quirks and excite you enough to work towards your goals. Take care of yourself and focus on what really matters.
6) You’re overreacting to things that don’t even matter
It’s not healthy to let things get to you so much that it takes an entire day or week just to recover from an experience or situation. Everyone makes mistakes, and the only way to learn from them is to move on.
If you don’t take risks, you won’t be able to make those mistakes, but then you won’t be able to grow. It is important to find a balance between the two.
Take a deep breath and think about what matters most in your life. You’ve convinced yourself that it’s impossible, so why even try?
When something seems like it is impossible, people will often give up before they even give it a shot. But, if you have the right attitude, things are not impossible.
Take it one step at a time, work hard and never give up. Just because you don’t want to do something doesn’t mean it’s impossible.
A) Are you actually not willing to do it? Or B) Is something preventing you? If the answer is no to both A and B, then why not try and see what happens?
If you are worried about the future, it means that your fears are getting in the way of your happiness. The only way to experience happiness is to get rid of all your fears and live a full life.
But this idea of letting go of all your fears is far easier said than done.
To begin regaining control over your emotions, you need to start start implementing emotional regulation techniques.
Before you start groaning and thinking I’m setting you homework, try to keep an open mind and try out this free 20 minute Self-Healing Meditation.
Not feeling good about yourself because you’re feeling like people aren’t treating you nicely or because you don’t know how to make yourself look better is an issue you can resolve. The power is within you.
You need to let go of the negative comments and feelings that other people have and learn how to love yourself.
I used to be a slave to my emotions, and it was hellish.
And yes, whilst it’s taken a great deal of patience and practice, I can now confidently say that I’m no longer prone to making mountains out of molehills for unnecessary reasons.
Why not try out the free meditation and see how you feel afterwards?
7) You’re self-critical
The main characteristic of being self-critical is that you are always jumping to negative conclusions without evidence or facts to back them up. The one thing to remember is that you are desperate to get out of the situation.
Don’t let your thoughts convince you that it will never be better when there may be something positive on the horizon. You just need to take a leap of faith and realize that things will improve.
You need to realize that your thoughts, which are negative, are not helping you move forward towards happiness. They are just holding you back from experiencing true happiness and satisfaction in life.
The only way to feel truly satisfied is to let go of all your thoughts of unhappiness and negativity.
8) You’re negative
You feel like you never achieve anything or get anywhere no matter how hard you try – everything is a struggle for you, but for no reason that anyone can identify. You always find new negative things to think about even though you have no proof that these things will help you in the long run.
Don’t let your emotions run the show in everything you do, but at the same time, don’t let them ruin your life by refusing to make decisions in life. Sometimes it is important to take a risk despite whether it will end up good or bad.
Your problems are not caused by what anyone else has done to you but rather by your own thoughts. The first step is to see this for yourself, but you must also recognize that you are your only solution to changing your life for the better.
Only then can you start working on how to overcome this situation and enjoy your life. If you seek out negative attention, you will find it, but wouldn’t it be better to focus on something more positive?
Do you like to keep people around you who will agree with you and criticize others instead of finding their flaws and working to improve themselves? Before getting too involved in this, think about why you do this, how it is helping or hurting you, and if you could be doing anything differently, that would help change for the better.
When you are unhappy with things in your life and are looking for negative attention from other people, take a step back and look at the way that you interact with your friends and find ways to change it.
What can you do to turn things around?
Are you spending all your time and energy with people who will feed your negativity, or are you spending time with the right people that will help you work towards a better life?
If you want to change things in your life, it is important to make the right choices in friends and relationships. If you are trying to get out of a bad relationship with someone, it is not going to happen overnight.
It takes effort, but if your motivation is strong enough, you can make it happen for yourself.
Here are some things that will help you make a positive change in life:
- think about the people you are surrounded with
- talk to a licensed psychologist
- meditate
- start some new habits that will help you to turn your life around
- tell people how important they are to you and remind them of these things every chance you get
- be as kind to yourself every day of the week
Don’t let thoughts convince you to stay in your negative situation because there are other better options for your life that will bring about real, lasting happiness.
The only way to get where you want to go is to work towards it.
Incorporating daily meditation practices such as this free Self-Healing Meditation practice are a great first step in helping change what you feel and how you think about yourself.
I know for a fact that my mental health and my sleep improved drastically when I finally committed to making meditating part of my daily routine. These sessions are my saviour in the periods where life starts to feel overwhelming, and to be honest, I’d be pretty lost without them.
Additionally, using simple affirmation statements like “I am beautiful” or “I am an amazing person” can equally help you change the way you see yourself and make you feel better about your situation.
As boring as they may sound, looking after your mind and body through exercise, nutrition and self-care will over time heals to build positive change.
Approach the problem by taking one step at a time and remember how integral each step is to the bigger picture.
On top of that, don’t blame other people for your unhappiness and think that someone is going to make an attempt to make your life better.
Instead, take a look at yourself and see what you can improve inside yourself. Don’t just focus on your good qualities, but also work on the bad ones since running away from negative traits won’t contribute to developing your personality in the desired direction.
If you can get a handle on your fears, all else will fall into place.
Don’t compare yourself to others as these comparisons you make between yourself and someone else can ruin your self-worth.
Learning and growing are important, but they shouldn’t come at the expense of your happiness. You need to accept who you are and how far you have come in life to be satisfied with where you are now.
The only way to do this is by accepting both the good and bad aspects of your life.
Take responsibility for your past
If you were hurt before, try to leave it in the past. There is no use bringing it into the present because it doesn’t solve anything but does cause more problems than not.
Don’t let bad things in your past keep ruining your future. The only way to move on is to forgive and forget what happened so that you can get on with life, be happy and live a full life.
If you are unhappy with a situation in your life, it is important to go back and figure out how you got there. You need to find out how to change your behavior in the future instead of letting yourself be influenced by others.
Before you do this, it would be good to try and make some small changes that will help motivate you to continue making new changes that will improve many aspects of your life.
If you are unhappy about something, take responsibility for what you have done to contribute to the situation. Don’t blame others for your unhappiness, and don’t dwell on the past – learn from it and move on.
If you want to change for the better, it is important to make a choice in what you do with your time and how you approach the situations in life. It is possible to live a positive, fulfilling life even when things aren’t going well.
Just make a conscious decision to think positively. When you are having a bad day, think about how you can change your outlook and what you can do to make things better.
If there is nothing that you can do to fix the situation or get back on track, realize that life just isn’t perfect and know that things will work out fine for the most part.
Final thoughts
In life, you will have many opportunities to have a positive attitude towards situations, but you do need to think about what is going on and work hard to overcome the negative thoughts that are trying to keep you from believing in yourself and living the life you want. If you make it difficult for yourself by letting bad things in your life influence how you think, it will be very difficult for you to enjoy your life.
All of us have periods when we have a hard time seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you want to turn things around, it is important to take a step back and look at what you can do to change things for the better. Cleanse yourself from all the negativity in your life and fill yourself up with positive energy.
It is possible to feel better about yourself and your life if you make the right choices when dealing with negative situations in your life and let go of the burden that was preventing you from loving your life!
