Having a strong personality can be both a blessing and a curse when it comes to maintaining healthy relationships with others.
For those to whom this applies, please don’t feel pressured to tone down what makes you you or try and fit yourself into a certain mould.
At the same time, there are certain (easily avoidable) mistakes that these strong characters tend to make in their conduct with others.
Because while these individuals are often highly confident and assertive, they may unintentionally steamroll their partner’s feelings or desires.
Having a strong personality doesn’t mean you’re doomed to relationship failure, but it does mean you might have to pay extra attention to some common pitfalls.
So, let’s explore the 8 specific mistakes people with powerful personalities tend to make in relationships (so you don’t have to repeat them!):
1) Stealing the limelight (but every time)
In relationships, communication is key (as we’ve no doubt all heard before)…
But it needs to be a two-way street.
People with strong personalities often have a lot to say and they sure aren’t afraid to say it.
They’re usually passionate, opinionated, and assertive – all great traits in the right context.
But in a relationship, this can sometimes translate into dominating conversations and stealing the spotlight, whilst totally eclipsing the other person.
It’s easy to get caught up in expressing your own thoughts, and have no qualms nor judgement about voicing these with confidence.
But if you forget to make space for your partner’s opinions, this oversight can quickly leave them feeling unheard or unimportant.
A conversation isn’t just about talking – it’s equally about listening.
So if you have a strong personality (and strong opinions!), take the time to slow down and actively listen to your partner. You may be surprised by what you learn, and your partner will thank you – trust me!
2) Control freak tendencies
People with strong personalities often have a clear vision of what they want and how to get there. This trait is one of their strengths. But in a relationship, this can sometimes come across as being controlling.
Have a little think: Who does all your planning? Who organizes the holidays, plans the dates, chooses the restaurant?
Now, you might argue that you’re being helpful by taking charge and making things get done.
But a constant need to assume control and micromanage every situation can easily leave the other person feeling left out and useless.
So, a word of warning for those with strong personalities: Try to remember that a relationship is a partnership. It’s not about one person dictating the terms – it’s about making decisions together.
And even if your partner is a little hopeless when it comes to organizing getaways and absolutely sucks at choosing a restaurant, give them the odd time to shine. You might be surprised at their capabilities!
3) High standards = overly critical
People with strong personalities tend to have high standards, not just for themselves but for others too.
And whilst this is an added bonus (striving for excellence means you achieve excellence more often than not), things can turn sour when feedback with good intentions morphs into undue criticism.
If you find yourself constantly pointing out your partner’s faults, take a step back. How much benefit is there really to telling them they need to brush their hair or speak a little louder?
Try to focus more on their strengths and less on their shortcomings. Focusing on the silver linings could make all the difference in maintaining a healthy relationship balance.
4) Struggling to compromise
The art of finding a middle ground is essential in relationships. There will be times when you both have differing views and desires, and thus have to seek out a compromise.
But for those with strong personalities, this can be an incredibly challenging concept.
These individuals often have firm beliefs and aren’t easily swayed. Owing to their high standards and perfectionist tendencies, they struggle to let go of what they want or think, and see the world from someone else’s eyes.
And being so deadset on my way or the highway can quickly lead to conflicts, if not managed properly.
So, if you’re someone who finds compromise challenging, it’s worth reminding yourself that working to accommodate your partner doesn’t mean you’re losing or giving up your values.
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Remember, it’s not always about being right…
Sometimes, it’s just about being kind!
5) No time for the small things
When you have a strong personality, it’s easy to get caught up in the big picture – grand plans for the future, big life decisions you’re focused on, and other significant milestones.
But in doing so, you might overlook the small things that make a relationship special.
You forget to appreciate your partner picking up your favorite baked treats, the loving hands on your shoulder, the casual everyday catchups – otherwise known as the glue that holds you two together and forms your bond.
So if you’re the type of person who finds themselves constantly focused on the bigger picture, try to take a step back to appreciate the little things.
It might seem insignificant and pointless, but they can make a massive difference in keeping your relationship alive and thriving.
6) Forgetting to show vulnerability
Strength and independence go a long way in maintaining healthy relationships, but vulnerability and softness are needed in equal measures for the perfect mix.
Those with strong personalities often project an aura of confidence and self-assurance. They don’t shy from a challenge and will stand their ground when tested.
But when it comes down to relationships, this strength can unfortunately pose as more a hindrance than a help.
These strong and daring individuals tend to fear opening up and showing their insecurities. But it’s in sharing these parts of ourselves that we allow our partners to truly see us and love us fully – flaws and all.
Remember, being vulnerable isn’t a sign of weakness: It’s a testament to your strength and the trust you place in your partner.
So let your guard down sometimes – it might be the key to bringing you two closer than ever.
7) “Help is for the weak!”
Fierce independence is a fantastic trait to have, and is a common attribute of those with a strong personality. However, it’s not unusual for these individuals to prefer handling challenges on their own.
A mixture of perfectionism and a lack of trust (tending to trust only in their own abilities) means that these strong-willed individuals will likely find asking for help deeply challenging.
Whether that looks like running to the pharmacy to pick up medicine when they’re sick, or helping them build some puzzling IKEA furniture, they’ll likely shudder and politely decline any assistance.
If you’re someone who finds it challenging to accept help, try to remind yourself that it’s okay to lean on your partner. After all, they’re there to support you – just as you are for them.
Partnership isn’t just about standing strong separately, but rather about lifting each other up when one of you needs that extra support.
8) Unable to see the world through your partner’s eyes
As we covered above, strong personalities are often closely interlinked with well-formed opinions.
Having confidence is never a bad thing, but it can pose a problem if being so rooted in your own views prevents you from opening up and understanding your partner’s perspective.
A relationship is comprised of two people coming together, which tends to mean a collision of ideas and thoughts.
No matter how compatible you are, nor how many thoughts and opinions you share, there will always be things upon which you disagree.
When these issues do come about, it’s important that you set your own thoughts and pride aside and try to see the world from their perspective.
You might not always agree with how they think, but the key is respecting the origin of their opinions and making an effort to listen and empathize.
In conclusion…
Possessing such self-confidence, strength, and independence is impressive, and all traits of which you should be proud.
However, if the above resonates with you and you’re aware of your strong personality, try not to lose sight of the transformative power of openness and vulnerability.
By softening your judgments – both of yourself and your partner – you’re recognizing that true strength lies in acknowledging your own gifts as well as the unique contributions of others.
Take a step back from focusing on the bigger picture and let gratitude guide your actions, expressing appreciation for the everyday moments and actively seeking compromise and understanding.
This way, you’ll be building foundations for genuine, reciprocated connection and lasting love.