Has life become unbearably dull for you these days? Well, welcome to adulthood, that stage in life where we’re finally free to do whatever we want, except…what do we really want?
It’s funny how we look forward to being grown-ups, only to find out that it’s largely made up of boring bits.
Like working (sometimes at jobs we don’t really like), paying bills, and just carrying out an endless list of responsibilities.
Where’s the excitement? The fun? The adventure?
Well, I’m here to say that a well-lived life begins with thoughtful design.
Meaning, if you’re finding life boring, it’s in your power to make it exciting again. And it all starts with a little self-examination. What habits are holding you back from living an exciting life?
Today, let’s talk about that. Here are 8 habits you need to say goodbye if you want to bring back that spring in your step:
1) Overcommitting yourself
First off, do you even have enough room in your life for fun? You might be stretching yourself too thin for things you don’t even want to do. No wonder life isn’t exciting anymore.
I remember when I was in my 20s, I had this exact same habit. Not only did I have FOMO, but I was also quite the people-pleaser.
So, I’d commit even my free time to events I could’ve said no to. I’d use my weekends to do favors for other people.
Looking back at that time in my life, I can only just groan at the idiocy of it. How could I have squandered away my time so badly?
Fortunately, growing old has made me wiser, at least in this respect. These days, I’m all about being selective. When I make a commitment, it’s because I want to and think it’s a good use of my time.
If you want life to be exciting again, that’s something you’ll need to do.
2) Prioritizing work over personal life
Speaking of overcommitment, there’s probably no bigger area where we do this than in our careers.
I get it – work is important, after all. But is it the be-all and end-all of our existence? Definitely not!
This is exactly what palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware shared in her book “The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.”
“I wish I hadn’t worked so hard” was the second most common regret people had on their deathbeds.
Do you really want to add this regret to yours? I’m sure you don’t. So it might be time to do a little trimming.
Give your best in your job, of course, but don’t give it 100% of yourself. Leave some for what ultimately matters most in life – your relationships.
This brings me to the next point…
3) Staying in toxic relationships
Did you know that our relationships determine the quality of our lives? You can have trillions in the bank, but if your relationships are crappy, you’ll still find yourself feeling miserable.
If you’ve been in an unhealthy relationship yourself, you know what I mean.
According to Prime Behavioral Health, toxic relationships can do so much damage on our mental health, like:
- Insecurity and low self-esteem
- Lack of energy
- Heightened anxiety and depression
- Increased stress levels
Not only that, all of that unhappiness will take a toll on your physical health as well. Life won’t just become boring – it will actually become unbearable.
Do yourself a favor and edit the relationships you have. If one does you more harm than good, limit your interaction or walk away.
4) Resisting change
One of the most common reasons why people get stuck in a rut is because they’ve allowed themselves to get too comfortable in their comfort zone and resist change.
I’ve noticed this in myself, too. Every time I get too entrenched in my comfort zone, my life turns boring. It’s easy, yeah, but boring.
So I guess the question here is: do you want easy but boring or do you want challenging but fun?
Truth is, the safe, shallow end isn’t much fun after a while because well, there’s not much to do. Your brain is just lying there dormant, paying only half the attention it’s capable of because it’s now running on autopilot.
Research shows that novelty gets your brain sparkly and alive. It releases dopamine – a feel-good neurotransmitter – and this leads to a better mood, a positive outlook, and more motivation and goal-setting.
Exactly what you need for an exciting life!
5) Doomscrolling on social media
How many minutes do you waste doomscrolling on social media? Or maybe I should change that to “hours”?
This habit is a real time thief. And it alters our mood as well. According to research, the more time we spend consuming negative social media content, the more distressed we feel.
Plus, it leads to other unhealthy habits like sleep procrastination, isolation from friends and family, and a sedentary lifestyle.
So once again, I urge you to curate your life. Curate not only the content you consume, but also be more intentional with how you spend your time.
6) Constantly comparing yourself to others
This is actually another thing that happens when we spend too much time on social media. But even if you don’t do that, you might still be engaging in social comparison in real-life settings.
Well, time to say goodbye to that. Comparing yourself to others all the time can drain your mental energy and joy for living.
You’re left looking at your own journey in life with a negative lens, even if you’ve actually got it good!
And on top of that, it doesn’t even make sense. You’re not the same person as Denise or Charlie. You’ve got different strengths and gifts.
So why subject yourself to all that misplaced disappointment and discouragement?
7) Ignoring your passions and hobbies
Who said adulthood needs to be all serious? This is one thing we always forget – to work hard and play hard. It’s this balance that keeps us sane and happy!
I can’t imagine my life without my passions and hobbies. It’s hard to be bored when I know that I’ve got my sketchbook or my DIY miniature kits waiting for me after work.
It adds a little more spice and gives me something to look forward to.
So, what are you interested in? Golf? Playing the guitar? Volunteering?
Whatever it is, make room for it in your life. I guarantee that the excitement level of your life will shoot up.
Oh, and a little icing on the cake – studies show it will make you more creative, expressive, and healthier!
8) Not having a purpose
Finally, ask yourself this question – what does it all mean?
Does that sound a little existentialist? Well, I find that a good dose of existential questioning can actually be quite healthy during times of discontent.
I think that we feel bored or dissatisfied because we have this nagging feeling that there’s something we should be doing, or something we’re supposed to be doing.
The problem is, we don’t know what it is.
So, it’s always good to confront our current reality and ask the big questions: What am I here for? What truly matters to me?
This sort of introspection is your first step towards being more intentional about your life.
So, if you’re feeling lost or disconnected, take some time to reflect on what brings you the most joy and what you find deeply meaningful.
When you understand what drives you, you can become more proactive. You can begin to shape a life that not only excites and fulfills you but also makes a positive impact on the world around you.
