Emotional intelligence isn’t about tricking people or masking your true intentions. It’s about understanding and managing your emotions, and empathizing with others to create strong, positive relationships.
Good news is, you can gauge your emotional intelligence through your language. There are certain phrases that indicate a high level of emotional understanding.
In this piece, we’ll explore 10 key phrases that reveal you possess more emotional intelligence than most. If you frequently use these, then you’re probably more emotionally intelligent than you give yourself credit for.
So, let’s dive in and see if these words and phrases are part of your everyday vocabulary.
1) “I understand how you feel”
Emotional intelligence is all about empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of others.
This understanding often comes across in our language, especially when we’re trying to connect with someone on an emotional level.
Consider a friend who’s going through a hard time. An emotionally intelligent person doesn’t just offer solutions or advice. Instead, they might start with something like, “I understand how you feel…”
This phrase shows that you’re not just hearing their words, but you’re also taking the time to understand their emotions. It’s an acknowledgment of their feelings and a sign of your willingness to empathize.
2) “How are you feeling?”
This seems like such a simple phrase, but the implications are far-reaching.
In a world where everyone’s rushing about, it’s rare to find someone who genuinely asks about your feelings. And no, I’m not talking about the casual “how are you?” that’s often just a polite conversation starter.
I’m talking about sincerely inquiring into someone’s emotional state.
This shows not just a high level of emotional intelligence, but also empathy and understanding. It suggests that you’re not just interested in surface-level small talk, but genuinely care about the other person’s emotional well-being.
It’s a phrase that can open up deeper conversations and help build meaningful connections.
3) “I appreciate your perspective”
Valuing the opinions and thoughts of others is a hallmark of someone with high emotional intelligence.
This phrase indicates that you’re not only acknowledging the other person’s viewpoint, but you’re also appreciating it. It shows that you value their opinions and thoughts, even if they differ from your own.
This doesn’t mean you always have to agree with them.
But it’s about understanding that different perspectives provide valuable insights and contribute to a more rounded view of situations.
By appreciating and validating other people’s perspectives, you’re fostering an environment of respect and open communication. It’s a powerful way to show your emotional intelligence in action.
4) “How can I help?”
Those with high emotional intelligence not only empathize with others but also act upon it. They’re proactive in offering help.
Asking “How can I help…?” is a simple yet powerful phrase. It shows your willingness to support others and contribute positively to their situation.
It’s not just understanding emotions; it’s responding to them in a meaningful way.
5) “Let’s see it from your perspective”
Emotionally intelligent people understand that everyone has their unique viewpoint. They are open-minded and are willing to see things from other perspectives.
By saying “Let’s see it from your perspective…”, you’re showing a genuine interest in understanding others’ feelings and thoughts. It indicates your willingness to step out of your comfort zone and challenge your own beliefs.
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This attitude fosters mutual respect and understanding, key elements in maintaining healthy relationships.
6) “I need some time to process this”
Emotionally intelligent people understand the importance of taking time for self-reflection and introspection.
I remember a time when I received some unexpected news. It left me feeling overwhelmed and unsure of how to react. Rather than responding impulsively, I said, “I need some time to process this…”
This phrase is about acknowledging your emotions and giving yourself permission to take a step back. It’s about taking the time to understand your feelings and thoughts before you respond. It’s a sign of emotional self-awareness, a key aspect of emotional intelligence.
7) “I see where you’re coming from”
This is about demonstrating empathy towards others’ viewpoints, even if you don’t necessarily agree with them.
When you say, “I see where you’re coming from…”, you’re acknowledging their thoughts and feelings. It shows that you value their perspective and are open to understanding their experiences.
This helps in building trust and rapport, as it makes people feel heard and understood. It’s a key trait of emotionally intelligent individuals who strive to create positive and respectful interactions.
8) “I’m sorry”
Apologizing when you’re wrong is a clear sign of emotional intelligence. It shows that you’re capable of recognizing your mistakes and taking responsibility for them.
When we apologize, we show humility and sincerity. We acknowledge our imperfections, and by doing so, we display vulnerability, which can strengthen our relationships.
If you’re someone who doesn’t shy away from saying “I’m sorry” when you mess up, then you likely have a higher level of emotional intelligence than most. But an apology is only as good as the actions that follow it. So make sure your actions align with your words.
9) “You’re not alone”
One of the most powerful things you can say to someone going through a tough time is, “You’re not alone”.
This simple phrase, although not always easy to express, can provide immense comfort. It’s a heartfelt way of showing empathy and understanding, letting the person know that they don’t have to face their struggles on their own.
It entails creating an emotional bond and demonstrating your support. This involves displaying an understanding of their emotions and being ready to stand by them.
Expressing such deep empathy and compassion is a true sign of emotional intelligence. It shows that you’re not just aware of your own feelings, but you’re also sensitive to the emotions of others, and are ready to provide comfort and support when it’s needed most.
10) “Let’s find a solution together”
Emotional intelligence often involves collaboration and problem-solving. A phrase that embodies this is, “Let’s find a solution together”.
By suggesting to work together on a solution, you’re acknowledging that the other person’s input is valuable. You’re not just dictating or imposing your own ideas, but are willing to listen and collaborate.
This phrase shows that you respect the other person’s perspective and believe in their capabilities. It also fosters a sense of unity and shared responsibility, which can strengthen relationships and improve outcomes.
So, ‘Let’s find a solution together’ doesn’t just mean solving problems. It involves demonstrating emotional intelligence through collaboration and mutual respect.
Final thoughts: It’s about connection
At the heart of emotional intelligence, you’ll find empathy, compassion, and genuine connection. It’s understanding not just our own emotions but also those of others.
Incorporating these phrases into your daily language isn’t just sounding smart or manipulative. It’s fostering stronger, deeper connections with the people around you.
A famous quote from Maya Angelou highlights this perfectly: “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
These phrases are simply tools to help us express our emotional intelligence. But remember, it’s not the words we use; it’s the authenticity and intention behind them.
Emotional intelligence is a journey. It’s about constant learning, growing and connecting. And this journey starts with how we communicate with others.
Next time, before you speak, pause for a moment and reflect on the impact your words can have. Because words matter. Relationships matter. People matter.