If you recognize these 7 signs, you’re truly at peace with being alone

Have you ever wondered what it feels like to be completely at peace with being alone? Even if you didn’t originally choose to be single, to be genuinely content without a romantic partner.

I recently reconnected with an old friend who, after years of searching for ‘the one’, found a surprising truth: true happiness within himself.

He confessed he used to feel like he “needed” to find someone, but ultimately found fulfillment in being single. It wasn’t just inspiring, but eye-opening.

It made me realize that embracing solitude can be a beautiful, and even necessary step before sharing your life with someone else. 

In this article, we’ll explore 7 signs that show you’re truly at peace with being alone — and therefore on the path to living a truly fulfilling life, with or without someone by your side.

1) Going to social events only because you truly want to

My friend’s transformation in how he approaches social events is a testament to being at peace with solitude. He used to attend numerous gatherings, often driven by an underlying goal to find a romantic partner. 

His motives weren’t exactly hidden; subtle comments revealed his hope of meeting someone special, whether at singles events, friendly get-togethers, or city-wide socials. 

Despite not always being in the mood, he’d push himself to go, clinging to the possibility of a romantic encounter.

I personally believe there is a powerful spiritual dimension at play here. His focused intent on finding someone shaped his interactions, affecting his demeanor and the energy he radiated.

This mindset may have led him to read too much into situations or try to force connections that weren’t naturally there.

And that’s one thing that has changed recently — he only goes to events now because he truly wants to. He shared that his interactions, whether they lead to friendship, a romantic spark, or nothing at all, are far more genuine and fulfilling. 

This change is a clear sign of someone who’s found contentment in their own company, free from the pursuit of others to complete them.

2) No fear of missing out

Another sign of being truly at peace with being alone is the absence of the ‘fear of missing out’, commonly known as FOMO

My friend, as I touched on above, used to be constantly haunted by the thought that he might be missing out on opportunities to meet someone if he wasn’t always ‘out there’. 

This fear drove him to stretch himself thin, attending every possible event and social gathering, regardless of whether he was interested or not.

Now, he’s reached a point where this fear no longer controls him. He understands that life isn’t just about chasing potential romantic encounters but about enjoying moments for what they are. 

He can now enjoy a quiet evening at home without feeling like he’s missing out on something crucial. 

This shift in mindset is profound. It’s about recognizing that true contentment doesn’t come from external sources – it’s cultivated from within.

By letting go of the fear of missing out, he’s opened himself up to a more authentic and peaceful way of living, one where he’s not constantly looking over his shoulder for what he might be missing, but is fully present in the now.

3) Strong boundaries

Strong, healthy boundaries are such an important part of life, and they are often difficult to maintain without being at peace with being alone. 

In the case of my friend for example, he often used to compromise his own comfort and values in the pursuit of a potential romantic relationship. 

He would bend over backwards to accommodate others just so he could be with someone, sometimes at the expense of his own well-being.

Now, he stands firm in his values and preferences. He has learned the importance of saying ‘no’ when situations don’t align with his beliefs or when he simply doesn’t feel up to it. 

This shift isn’t about being rigid or inflexible; it’s about respecting oneself and understanding personal limits.

Strong boundaries are a reflection of self-respect. They signify a deep understanding of one’s worth and the refusal to settle for less than what is deserved. 

My friend’s newfound ability to uphold these boundaries shows that he values himself and his own peace above the societal pressure to be in a relationship.

4) Fulfilling relationships with friends and family

zodiac signs who are genuinely content when theyre surrounded by family If you recognize these 7 signs, you’re truly at peace with being alone

So many people talk about looking for their “soulmate”, we overlook the fact that soulmates can come in many shapes and forms — including non-romantic ones. My friend in particular doesn’t believe in “soulmates”, but he did agree with me when I brought this up to him.

Previously, while he valued his friends and family, there was an underlying sense that at least some of these relationships were somehow a placeholder until he found a romantic partner. 

This perspective subtly influenced how he engaged with them, often overlooking the depth and significance of these connections.

Now, he cherishes these relationships for what they are — sources of deep connection, support, and joy. 

He invests time and energy into strengthening these bonds, finding immense fulfillment in them. It’s a beautiful attitude that reflects a broader understanding that meaningful relationships come in many forms, not just romantic ones.

And since adopting this appreciation, he’s discovered a richer, more diverse social life. His interactions with friends and family are no longer overshadowed by the absence of a romantic partner. Instead, they stand as fulfilling and valuable in their own right. 

5) Emotional balance

Another profound indicator of being at peace with being alone is the attainment of emotional balance. Observing my friend’s transformation, this aspect stands out distinctly. 

In his days of actively seeking a partner, his emotional state often fluctuated based on his dating life. 

A promising date would elevate his spirits, while a period of no romantic prospects would plunge him into disappointment.

Now, his emotional well-being is no longer tethered to his relationship status. He has cultivated a stable, balanced emotional state, where his happiness and sense of self-worth are internally sourced. 

This emotional autonomy is crucial. It means that while he’s open to the idea of a relationship, his contentment isn’t contingent upon being in one.

And we both agreed that this is the only way to enter into a relationship with a healthy mindset — without expecting the other person to “complete you” or “fill a hole” in your happiness.

This emotional balance also allows him to experience life’s ups and downs with a sense of equanimity. He enjoys the good moments and navigates challenges with a composed, centered approach. 

6) Cultivating a rich inner life

Being at peace with being alone often correlates with having a rich, vibrant inner life, something I’ve seen evolve beautifully in my friend. 

When his focus was primarily on finding a partner, his internal world was often clouded by feelings of inadequacy and longing. His thoughts were outwardly directed, fixated on how to find someone to share his life with.

Now, he’s turned his attention inward, exploring and nurturing his own passions, interests, and thoughts. 

He engages in activities that stimulate his mind and spirit, like reading thought-provoking books, delving into creative hobbies, or simply spending time in self-reflection. 

This shift towards an enriched inner life has brought him a sense of fulfillment that he previously sought in others.

But this is not to be misunderstood as keeping oneself occupied. Rather, it’s about deepening one’s understanding of self, exploring personal interests, and fostering a sense of inner fulfillment

For my friend, this meant realizing that he could be his own source of happiness and inspiration. This internal journey has allowed him to enjoy solitude as a time of growth and self-discovery, rather than a period of loneliness or unfulfilled desire.

7) Embracing reflection and growth

With my friend, the pivotal role of reflection and growth became evident as he transitioned from actively seeking a romantic partner to finding contentment in solitude. 

Earlier, his self-reflection often revolved around what he lacked — particularly, a romantic relationship, or perhaps the qualities and skills that he thought women wanted. This perspective sometimes led to a negative self-view and a constant sense of yearning.

However, as he grew more comfortable being alone, his approach to self-reflection transformed. He started using his time alone for introspection, focusing on personal development rather than on what he perceived as missing in his life. 

Thanks to that, he gained a deeper understanding of himself, his values, and his goals — and was able to grow in ways he hadn’t anticipated. He’s become more self-aware, learning from past experiences and using these insights to better himself. 

This kind of growth is invaluable; it’s not just about bettering oneself for a future relationship but about evolving as an individual, for yourself. 

Embracing solitude with grace

In exploring these signs, it’s clear that being at peace with being alone is an empowering and enriching journey. 

It transforms solitude from a state of lack to a space of self-discovery and growth. And as seen through my friend’s experience, embracing alone time with grace and self-awareness opens up a world of emotional richness and personal fulfillment. 

It’s a path that leads not just to contentment in solitude but to a deeper, more meaningful engagement with life itself.




Did you like my article? Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed.

Picture of Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

Enhance your experience of Ideapod and join Tribe, our community of free thinkers and seekers.

Related articles

Most read articles

Get our articles

Ideapod news, articles, and resources, sent straight to your inbox every month.