If you notice these 8 patterns of behavior in someone, they’re probably not a good person

Identifying a person’s true character isn’t always straightforward. Often, people hide their real selves behind masks, making it difficult to see who they really are.

However, there are certain behavioral patterns that can give away a person’s true nature. If you notice these 8 patterns in someone, it’s likely they may not be a good person.

In this article, I’m going to break down these patterns for you. By the end of it, you’ll be equipped with the knowledge to spot a not-so-good person from a mile away. Trust me, it’s easier than you think.

1) Frequent lies

First and foremost, one of the biggest red flags to watch out for is a habit of lying.

People who frequently lie, whether these are small white lies or significant fabrications, are likely not to be the best characters. Honesty, after all, is a cornerstone of any healthy relationship, be it personal or professional.

Lying often indicates a lack of respect for others and a willingness to manipulate reality to suit the person’s needs. It’s a clear sign that they prioritize their own interests above truth and transparency.

So next time you catch someone in a lie, don’t just brush it off. It could be an indication of deeper character flaws.

And remember, it’s always better to surround yourself with people who value honesty as much as you do.

2) They never apologize

Another pattern I’ve observed in people who aren’t particularly good is their inability to apologize. They either fail to acknowledge their mistakes or, worse, they twist the narrative to blame others.

I remember a former coworker of mine who never seemed to be able to say “I’m sorry”.

Even when it was clear that he’d dropped the ball on a project, he’d find a way to shift the blame onto someone else or even the circumstances. It wasn’t just frustrating; it was downright exhausting.

That’s when I realized that a genuine apology is more than just acknowledging a mistake. It’s about taking responsibility for your actions and showing respect for others.

If someone consistently fails to do this, it could be a sign they’re not the best person to be around.

3) They’re always the victim

One common trait among people who aren’t good is their tendency to play the victim.

No matter what happens, they always seem to be on the receiving end of things. They never take responsibility for their actions and always find a way to pass the blame onto someone else.

This victim mentality is a sign of low emotional intelligence. People with low emotional intelligence often struggle to understand their feelings and how their actions impact others.

As a result, they feel powerless in their own lives and blame others for their problems.

So, if you notice someone always playing the victim, it might be time to reconsider your relationship with them.

4) They show a lack of empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s a fundamental trait that helps us connect with each other on a deeper level. If someone lacks empathy, it could be a sign that they’re not a genuine person.

When someone doesn’t show empathy, they struggle to understand others’ feelings and perspectives.

As a result, they might come across as cold or uncaring.

They might dismiss other people’s emotions or fail to offer support when it’s needed.

If you notice someone consistently showing a lack of empathy, it’s worth taking note. It could be an indication that they’re not the kind of person you want to have in your life.

5) They consistently break promises

If a man uses these phrases in a conversation he lacks sincerity and emotional depth 2 If you notice these 8 patterns of behavior in someone, they're probably not a good person

Promises are the bedrock of trust in any relationship. When someone consistently breaks their promises, it can be deeply hurtful and damaging. It’s a clear sign that they don’t value or respect you enough to keep their word.

I believe that one of the most precious things we have is our word. It’s a representation of our integrity and character. When we make promises, we’re giving a piece of ourselves to others. We’re saying, “You can trust me. I won’t let you down.”

So when someone repeatedly breaks their promises, it’s not just about the broken commitments. It’s about the broken trust, the disrespect, and the disregard for your feelings.

6) They’re constantly critical

Criticism, when constructive, can be beneficial. It can help us grow and improve.

But when someone is constantly critical, and their criticism is more destructive than constructive, it can be a sign they’re not a nice  person.

I recall a time when I was always on the receiving end of harsh criticism from a ‘friend’. Whether it was my choices, my appearance, or even my ideas, nothing seemed good enough for her. This constant negativity was not only hurtful but also draining.

It took me some time to realize that this was not about me, but rather a reflection of her own insecurities.

A good person lifts others up, they don’t tear them down. Constant criticism could be an indication of deeper issues within the person dishing it out.

7) They’re excessively controlling

Being in control of our own lives is important, but when someone tries to control others excessively, it’s a serious red flag. This behavior can manifest in various ways, such as trying to dictate what someone else should do, wear, or even think.

People who are overly controlling often have deep-seated insecurities and fears that they try to mitigate by controlling their environment, including the people around them. This behavior isn’t just annoying – it’s a form of emotional abuse.

If you notice someone in your life exhibiting controlling behavior regularly, it might be time to reassess your relationship with them. Remember, each of us has the right to freedom and individuality.

8) They show no remorse

Perhaps one of the most telling signs that someone is not a good person is a lack of remorse for their wrongdoings. When someone does something wrong, it’s normal to feel guilty or regretful.

But when a person doesn’t feel any remorse, it’s a sign that they lack a moral compass.

Showing remorse means acknowledging that you’ve hurt someone and feeling genuinely sorry about it. It’s about wanting to make things right. If someone doesn’t show any remorse for their actions, it indicates that they don’t care about the pain they’ve caused.

This is a serious sign of a potentially harmful individual. If you see this trait in someone, it’s important to protect yourself and consider distancing from them.

Final thought: It’s about self-awareness

Understanding human behavior and traits is an intriguing journey, and more often than not, it leads us to reflect on our own behavior.

While we’ve discussed the patterns that might indicate someone is not a good person, it’s important to remember that nobody is perfect. We all exhibit some negative behaviors at times, and that doesn’t necessarily make us bad people.

However, what sets a good person apart is their ability to recognize, accept, and work on their flaws. It’s about self-awareness and a willingness to improve.

As we navigate through life, interacting with a myriad of personalities, it’s crucial to remember this distinction. Identifying negative patterns in others not only helps us protect ourselves but also guides us in our own journey of personal growth.

In the end, it’s about cultivating empathy, understanding, and kindness – towards others and ourselves.

After all, as the renowned author Maya Angelou once said, “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Picture of Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham

Lucas Graham, based in Auckland, writes about the psychology behind everyday decisions and life choices. His perspective is grounded in the belief that understanding oneself is the key to better decision-making. Lucas’s articles are a mix of personal anecdotes and observations, offering readers relatable and down-to-earth advice.

Enhance your experience of Ideapod and join Tribe, our community of free thinkers and seekers.

Related articles

Most read articles

Get our articles

Ideapod news, articles, and resources, sent straight to your inbox every month.

0:00
0:00