As a self-confessed loner, I cherish my alone time. It gives me space to think, reflect, and (most importantly) recharge.
What can I say – I’m a true introvert (and an INFP).
But here’s the thing.
It’s not that I don’t like spending time with others (in small doses, of course). I just honestly enjoy my own company. Along with the freedom to pursue my interests and hobbies. For this reason, I never get lonely.
And ironically, I’m not alone.
The truth is, you don’t need to be an introvert to appreciate the benefits of solitude.
If only, occasionally.
So, if you recognize these 10 traits (chances are) you genuinely enjoy being alone.
1) You’re fiercely independent
According to professionals, there are five types of “loners” in this world; positive, negative, unintentional, short-term, and long-term.
Which one do you fall under?
Good question.
If you’re an autonomous self-starter, then you likely fall under the intentional category.
That’s right!
You’re reliant on no one. In fact, you have no problem being the primary decision-maker, traveling solo, or booking a table for one.
That’s because it’s your choice.
Unlike unintentional loners, you don’t lack the social skills to make friends or integrate with others. And when it comes to the workplace or classroom, you’re able to play nice in a team – no sweat.
You simply prefer your independence (you’re self-sufficient).
For one, being alone allows you to do things on your own terms and at your own pace. What’s more, there are no distractions, office politics, or authority figures looking over your shoulder.
It’s a confidence thing.
And let’s face it, it’s when you do your best work (and thinking).
2) You’re a deep thinker
There’s a fine line between loneliness and solitude. But for you, it’s simple…
Solitude provides you with an opportunity for deep introspection, contemplation, and self-reflection.
In other words, it gives you time to think.
In fact, you’re quite happy sitting there (in silence) with nothing but your inner thoughts for company.
Sounds crazy, I know.
But just like the many great philosophers (and deep thinkers) before you, quiet is your best friend.
Take Albert Einstein, for example…
Known for favoring solitude (and shunning telephones), he claimed seclusion gave him time to fully immerse himself, concentrate, innovate, and make better decisions.
Something that helped him to make those groundbreaking discoveries he’s known for.
And in the words of Albert Einstein:
“The monotony and solitude of a quiet life stimulates the creative mind.”
3) You’re a night owl
Do you often come up with your best ideas when everyone else is asleep? Perhaps you regularly find yourself lying awake (in the dead of night) contemplating your next big business move…
Not only do you enjoy time alone, but you’re probably a night owl to boot.
Let me explain.
Night owls and lone wolves have long been linked, which makes sense. The witching hour (nighttime) is much quieter than the hustle and bustle of daily life.
After all, it’s the perfect time to get stuff done without noise and distraction (it’s also when the telemarketers and kids are asleep).
However, there are some disadvantages to having a delayed circadian clock. In addition to some (unintentional loners) feeling increased loneliness, it may affect your health.
So what’s the good news?
Well, studies show that night owls (typically) have higher IQs than morning larks. You’re also increasingly likely to be a creative soul (as well as more productive).
4) You have a creative mind
Does the sound of solitude inspire you?
Well, I’ve got news for you – you’re in good company.
There’s a long list of well-known artists, scientists, musicians, and writers who credit seclusion for their creativity.
In fact, almost 70% of “gifted people” are said to be introverts.
But that’s not all…
Research suggests that being alone can fuel creative minds.
The study, conducted by psychologist Julie C. Bowker, found that those who answered “shyness” or “avoidance” (as reasons for social withdrawal) scored low on the creativity scale.
In contrast, those who answered “unsociability” scored high on creativity. Not only that, but they were less likely to be aggressive.
Ultimately, being alone provides time for introspection, brainstorming, and pursuing creative activities. What’s more, engaging in creativity has a long list of health benefits, including an increased sense of satisfaction and better cognitive functioning.
It can even make you happier.
In fact, psychologist, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, once said:
“Of all human activities, creativity comes closest to providing the fulfillment we all hope to get in our lives.”
5) You’re content on your own
Remember how earlier, I mentioned that there are five different types of loner?
Well, if you’re comfortable alone (and not self-conscious about it) then all signs point to you being a positive one. By that I mean, you’re mentally strong and oozing self-esteem.
You heard right.
Not only are you content in your own company, but solitude helps you find joy, peace, and fulfillment. And that’s because you have an amazing sense of self.
As a result, you don’t feel the need to fold to social pressure. You’re happy doing you, even if that means going against the grain.
In a nutshell…
You’re happy being yourself. Being alone doesn’t frighten you because you don’t feel a constant need for external validation or social approval.
Mostly, you know that there’s a difference between being alone (physical) and being lonely (emotional) – and you’re definitely not the latter.
6) You choose your friends carefully
For you, solitude is a choice. But that doesn’t mean you don’t also enjoy the company of others.
At the end of the day, you’re not a total recluse. You see value in others, shared experiences, and all that socializing can bring.
However, when you do decide to spend time with others, you’re very selective about who you let into your inner circle.
And with good reason.
After all, just because you have friends, doesn’t mean you need to say “yes” to every social gathering and shindig in town.
The fact is, some people can be downright draining.
Instead, you like to surround yourself with like-minded people. Those who understand your boundaries – and respect them.
Because when the chips are down, you’re in control.
If we’re being honest here, you’re just as happy at home alone reading the latest copy of New Scientist or scrolling through Reddit.
7) You have a growth mindset
Are you constantly learning, taking up new hobbies, and spending your alone time pursuing a variety of interests?
Perhaps you can’t help but tinker away (at all hours of the day) in your makeshift workshop.
Well, it sounds like you have a growth mindset.
Let me explain…
Someone with a growth mindset understands that we’re all works in progress. As such, they spend their time acquiring new skills and knowledge in an effort to better themselves.
It can be through reading, hobbies, travel, or taking up a new language (whatever you like).
And contrary to popular belief, you don’t need to be intelligent to have a growth mindset – just an open mind and a heap of curiosity.
Not to mention, time!
8) You value your time (and personal space)
Hey – being innovative, creative, and acquiring new hobbies is time-consuming. That’s why your time is a precious commodity.
Let me put it this way…
It’s too valuable to be wasted on trivial social activities – you’re too busy! After all, no one said the pursuit of knowledge would be easy.
Therefore, when you do agree to meet with friends, you have to weigh up the pros and cons.
That includes acknowledging and respecting your own personal boundaries.
In other words, you like to be efficient. A trait that helps you be more productive and focused when it comes to achieving your goals and sticking to your schedule.
9) You’re deeply empathetic
Do you have an uncanny ability to sense what people are feeling?
It’s like your superpower.
Not only does it allow you to recognize and understand how others are feeling, but it puts you in their shoes.
Something that helps you make connections, decisions, and friends.
But (to quote Uncle Ben) “With great power comes great responsibility.” And being highly attuned to the emotions and experiences of others can take a lot out of you.
That’s why you need time to recharge (alone).
Think about it…
When you’re able to connect with others through how they’re feeling, it can be emotionally overwhelming. Especially when you’re in a large crowd.
So it stands to reason, that you’d relish some alone time – away from the thoughts and emotions of others.
That’s why…
10) You hate petty drama (and small talk)
Last but certainly not least, part of why you enjoy being alone is to avoid all the drama.
That’s right. You have a low tolerance for superficial interactions and with it, petty disagreements, gossip, and hearsay.
That goes double for small talk! To you, it’s a waste of valuable time.
Instead, you prefer to focus on deep, meaningful connections that matter. In other other words, quality over quantity.
The kind of relationships that merit coming out of solitude for. But at the same time friendships that don’t require constant maintenance.
Because when you do make friends, it’s for life.
Whether or not you agree with all the traits on this list, I think everyone (loner or not) can appreciate that sometimes, it’s crucial to put yourself first and embark on some quiet “me time.”
Most importantly, though, it’s about finding balance.
