If you display these 16 behaviors, you’re a pleasant person to be around

Some people are more pleasant than others. 

But why? 

It all comes down to the way they act and treat other people. 

If you’re one of these pleasant people, then you’ll resonate with a lot of these signs below. These are the behaviors that come naturally to likable and pleasant folks. 

Let’s take a look.

1) Just smile

Your smile is one of your most valuable possessions. 

In fact, it’s no exaggeration to say that a great smile is the passport to a great life and fulfilling relationships and career opportunities. 

Your smile and your eyes are the first thing anybody notices about you. 

If you have a genuine and bright smile, people generally enjoy being around you

2) Listen for real

The next attribute that makes you great to be around is that you actually listen. 

People notice this, especially in a world where everybody seems glued to their phones. 

When you listen for real and practice active listening, folks really appreciate that. 

They can see that you’re not only hearing the words they say, but also the needs, fears and motivations behind the words being said. 

3) Humble yourself

Humility is another personality trait that makes you highly likable

We live in societies where chasing social media clout and looking for ways to feel special has become almost an Olympic sport. 

Not being like that immediately sets you apart and makes you likable and pleasant in a very real way. 

People notice that you respect yourself but that it doesn’t cross into egotism or disrespect of others, and they truly appreciate that. 

4) Find ways to connect

If you’re the kind of person who always finds a way to connect to others, that makes you highly pleasant to be around. 

Common examples include: 

  • Asking someone questions about what they’re interested in.
  • Commenting on people’s interesting ideas or remarks.
  • Bringing up current events, sports, the weather or small talk.
  • Finding ways to build off what somebody is saying and show that you have insights and information about it.

And many more ideas for connecting… 

5) Offer value 

When you’re a pleasant person, you offer value to everyone you meet in some way or another. 

Value can be defined in any way that adds something instead of taking it away:

You tell a joke here, you offer a tidbit of advice there, you do a small favor elsewhere. Maybe you just recommend a great restaurant for somebody who asks, or encouragement to a friend struggling in her relationship.

You’re pleasant to be around because instead of seeking validation and attention you provide it. 

6) Help people

The next thing that makes you very pleasant to be around is when you’re a generally helpful person

You do little favors where you can without any desire for recognition or reward. 

You just like to help out a bit when you can. 

It’s no big deal, but it guides many of your interactions and draws people to you and to friendship with you. 

7) Be useful

Competence is another quality that makes you pleasant to be around and sought after. 

People are drawn to a man or woman who’s useful and competent. 

This is something Arnold Schwarzenegger talks about in his new book Be Useful

If you want to succeed and lead a fulfilling life, you need to be a net asset to yourself and others. You need to love yourself and believe in your dreams even when big obstacles (or your own mistakes) stand in your path. 

Helping people throughout life is a way to be useful and pleasant while making the world a genuinely better place. 

8) Be flexible 

Flexibility is another thing that makes you pleasant to be around. 

It’s rarer than many realize, especially when folks are busy and caught up in their daily schedules. 

When you’re willing to be flexible and understanding about other people’s schedules and priorities, it makes you very pleasant. You don’t get worked up or angry, you just try to approach things rationally. 

If somebody flakes on you a lot, you just don’t make plans with them again. But generally speaking you’re relaxed about scheduling issues. 

9) Confident body language

people who are good at small talk always use these phrases If you display these 16 behaviors, you're a pleasant person to be around

Confident and poised body language makes you pleasant and attractive to be around.

People tend to feel calmer and more drawn to you when you feel calm and confident in yourself. 

It’s almost like a mirroring effect

When you go around with confident body language and an upright posture, people notice that and they enjoy being around you. 

10) Speak clearly and amicably

The way you speak also has a big influence on how pleasant you are to be around. 

As a general rule, you’re a pleasant person to be around if you speak clearly but also in a friendly way. 

You don’t shout and talk aggressively or ultra-rapidly, but you also don’t mumble, add lots of “uhhs” and “errs” or swear a lot. 

You’re basically speaking in a way others can understand and also feel safe around. 

11) Be sincere and frank

People really appreciate being around someone who somebody who means what they say and speaks frankly. 

If that sounds like you, then congratulations. 

You’re the kind of person I’d enjoy chatting with, because there are no frills or gimmicks. 

It’s nice to be around someone who’s genuine in what they say and doesn’t get too fancy or long-winded in the way they say it. 

12) Let people be different

People enjoy being around a person who doesn’t try to fit them into preset boxes. 

If you’re the kind of person who’s OK with letting people be different then you’re pleasant to be around, because you don’t pressure anyone to conform to something. 

You may not even agree with everyone’s identity decisions or lifestyle choices, but you accept that they’re different than you. 

And that’s OK. As long as you can still coexist, you’re not going to force anyone to think or believe the way you do. 

13) Supportive gestures 

If you are the kind of person who makes supportive gestures to others, you’re pleasant to be around. 

This goes for small favors you do for people, little gifts you buy on the spur of the moment, or heartfelt advice you give when you could just not bother. 

This is much appreciated and people feel supported and seen when you show your supportive side

14) Eye contact 

Making strong eye contact is another thing that makes you quite pleasant. 

Eye contact can be overwhelming if it’s too intense or fierce, but generally speaking eye contact is something that is much appreciated by people who you meet. 

If you look people in the eye and present your sincere self to them, they appreciate that and find it likable. 

The eyes are also the windows to the soul and eye contact can be an important first step to falling in love. 

15) Make folks laugh

Who doesn’t like a funny person

I certainly do, and so does everybody else I know. 

Of course, we all have a different sense of humor, but the mere fact that you’re a person who tries to bring a bit of levity to life makes you pleasant to be around. 

Instead of making hard situations and stressful days even heavier with negative commentary or anger, you crack a joke about it and break the dark spell. 

Sure, things may still be hard, annoying and stressful, but at least you’re finding some slice of humor in the midst of the mess. 

16) Generosity

Everybody likes a generous person. 

If you’re the type to buy a round of drinks or give a thoughtful gift to a friend, you’re going to be very popular. 

The downside here is not to become somebody people take advantage of and sponge off of. 

But as long as your generosity has boundaries, it’s an admirable quality and one of the many reasons you’re a very pleasant person to be around. 

Paul Brian

Paul Brian

Paul R. Brian is a freelance journalist and writer who has reported from around the world, focusing on religion, culture and geopolitics. Follow him on www.twitter.com/paulrbrian and visit his website at www.paulrbrian.com

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