We’ve all been there – wondering if someone’s got our back or if they’re just playing us.
It’s tough out there, but luckily, there are some clear signs that can help you figure out who’s truly on your team.
Forget the fancy words and vague promises, this article breaks down 9 behaviors that people with genuine good intentions simply won’t exhibit.
From flaky promises to sneaky manipulation, we’re calling out the red flags so you can protect yourself and build relationships with people who actually deserve your trust.
Let’s get real about what it means to have someone’s best interests at heart.
1) They don’t make false promises
In the realm of good intentions, honesty is the best policy. People who genuinely care don’t make promises they can’t keep.
False promises are a classic sign of manipulation. It’s an attempt to win trust or favor, but it’s built on false pretenses, and that’s not fair to the other person involved.
People with good intentions understand this. They know that trust is earned through consistent actions and not just sweet words.
They’d rather be upfront about their limitations than give someone false hope. The truth might be hard sometimes, but it’s always better than a lie.
So if someone is always promising you the moon and the stars without ever delivering, you might want to question their intentions.
2) They never take advantage of others
Good intentions also mean respecting the boundaries and rights of others. People who genuinely care won’t use you for their personal gain.
I remember a friend I had back in college. Let’s call him John. John was always there to lend a hand, but as time passed, I noticed a pattern.
He’d only offer help when he needed something in return. Be it notes before exams or help with his assignments, his offers of assistance always had a catch.
It was a hard pill to swallow, but it made me realize that John was taking advantage of my willingness to help. His actions didn’t align with someone who had good intentions.
People who truly care will help you because they want to, not because they expect something in return.
They respect you as an individual and won’t use you as a stepping stone for their needs.
3) They don’t twist the truth
Honesty is a pillar of good intentions. People who genuinely care about others won’t distort the truth to serve their own purposes.
Did you know that according to a study conducted by the University of Massachusetts, around 60% of adults can’t have a ten minute conversation without lying at least once? Quite startling, right?
But people with good intentions strive to be part of the 40%.
They believe in transparency and honesty, even when the truth is uncomfortable or difficult. They understand that trust, once broken, is hard to rebuild.
So they choose to be upfront, ensuring they don’t jeopardize their relationships with dishonesty.
4) They don’t manipulate emotions
Emotional manipulation is a clear sign of ill intentions.
People who truly care about you won’t play with your emotions to get what they want.
Emotional manipulation can take many forms – guilt-tripping, gaslighting, or making you feel indebted are just a few examples. These tactics are used to control others and can cause significant psychological harm.
People with good intentions respect your feelings. They communicate openly and honestly, and they don’t use your emotions as a tool for their own benefit.
If someone constantly makes you feel guilty or confused, it’s likely that their intentions aren’t as pure as they seem.
5) They don’t make you feel inferior
True intentions are grounded in respect and empathy. People who genuinely care about you will never belittle you or make you feel less than.
If someone constantly criticizes you, puts you down, or makes you feel like you’re not good enough, they probably don’t have your best interests at heart.
This kind of behavior is often a form of power play, designed to make the other person feel small.
People with good intentions uplift others. They encourage and support, rather than degrade and discourage. They recognize your worth and would never intentionally harm your self-esteem.
6) They don’t ignore your feelings
At the heart of good intentions, you’ll find empathy and understanding. People who truly care about you will take your feelings into account.
It’s a painful experience when someone disregards your feelings. Maybe you’ve poured your heart out, only to be met with indifference. Or perhaps you’ve shared your worries, only to be told you’re overreacting…
But these are not signs of good intentions.
A person who cares about you will listen when you express your feelings. They’ll offer comfort and understanding, not dismissal or judgment.
Understanding and respecting emotions is a cornerstone of healthy relationships. If someone consistently ignores or invalidates your feelings, it might be time to question their intentions.
7) They don’t break confidences
Trust is a critical component of any relationship. And a person with good intentions knows to respect that trust, especially when it comes to confidential matters.
There was a time when I confided in a friend about a personal issue I was dealing with. It was something I was deeply embarrassed about and had asked her to keep it to herself.
But within a week, I started receiving messages from other friends offering their sympathies. It was clear my secret wasn’t a secret anymore.
That betrayal hurt. It’s one thing to accidentally slip up, but it’s another to willingly share someone else’s private matters without their consent.
People with good intentions respect your privacy. They won’t share your secrets or personal matters with others because they understand the value of trust and the damage that betraying it can do.
8) They don’t avoid responsibility
People with good intentions are accountable for their actions. They don’t dodge responsibility or blame others for their mistakes.
Accountability is a sign of maturity and sincerity. It shows that a person is willing to accept the consequences of their actions and learn from their mistakes.
If someone consistently avoids taking responsibility, it might be a sign that they value their own image over honesty and growth.
People with good intentions, however, know that everyone makes mistakes and that owning up to them is an essential step towards improvement and personal development.
9) They don’t compromise your values
The most crucial aspect to remember is that people with genuine intentions will never push you to compromise your values.
Your beliefs and values are an integral part of who you are. They guide your decisions, shape your behavior, and define your character.
Anyone who pressures you to go against your values doesn’t truly have your best interests at heart.
Instead, those with good intentions will respect and support your values, even if they don’t entirely agree with them. They understand the importance of staying true to oneself and won’t ask you to sacrifice that for their benefit.
Final words
So there you have it – a no-nonsense guide to spotting those who might not have the purest intentions.
Navigating the maze of relationships is never easy, but armed with this knowledge, you can weed out the manipulators and energy vampires.
Remember, healthy relationships are built on trust, respect, and mutual support.
Don’t settle for anything less.
You deserve to be surrounded by people who celebrate your wins, understand your struggles, and genuinely want to see you thrive.
So next time you’re questioning someone’s motives, look out for these nine behaviors – they’ll tell you all you need to know.
