We all know people in our lives who always seem to put themselves down.
They might not believe in themselves, or they say sorry too much.
These are signs that they might not think they’re worth much.
Everyone we meet is different. Some people are full of confidence, while others struggle with feeling good about themselves.
And sometimes, we might feel this way too.
In this article, we’ll talk about nine signs that someone doesn’t value themselves enough.
Understanding these signs can help us get to know ourselves and others better.
1. Constant Self-Criticism
The first sign of low self-worth is constant self-criticism.
We all have moments of self-doubt or times when we mess up and feel bad about it. That’s perfectly normal.
But when a person always finds faults in themselves and never seems to have anything good to say about their abilities, it could be a sign they have low self-worth.
These individuals typically focus on their failures rather than their successes.
They may blame themselves for things beyond their control, or they might downplay their accomplishments, saying they were just lucky or that anyone could have done it.
If you notice someone – or even yourself – being excessively hard and never giving credit where it’s due, it may be because of low self-worth.
Remember, everyone makes mistakes; it’s part of being human. The key is to learn from them and recognize our strengths along with our weaknesses.
2. People-Pleasing Behavior
Another common sign of low self-worth is always trying to please others, even at their own expense.
These people often go out of their way to make others happy, putting their own needs and desires on the back burner.
They might agree with someone even when they don’t really feel the same way or do things they don’t want to do just because someone else asked. They often fear that saying “no” will make others dislike them or think less of them.
This behavior comes from a place of not feeling good enough and feeling that they need to do more to be accepted.
But it’s essential to remember that it’s okay to prioritize your own needs and it doesn’t make you selfish or rude.
Everyone has a right to their own opinions and feelings, and it’s perfectly fine to express them.
3. Difficulty Accepting Compliments
This one is something I’ve personally struggled with and it’s a classic sign of low self-worth.
When someone compliments you, do you immediately brush it off or try to downplay it? I used to do that a lot.
Once, after a presentation at work, a colleague told me I did a great job. Instead of simply saying “thank you,” I found myself quickly downplaying it, saying something like, “Oh, it was nothing. I was just lucky everything went smoothly.”
For people with low self-worth, accepting compliments can be really hard.
They feel like they don’t deserve them or worry that they’ll appear arrogant if they accept them too readily.
But here’s what I learned: there’s nothing wrong with accepting praise for your hard work and accomplishments! It doesn’t make you vain; it means you’re acknowledging your efforts and skills.
So the next time someone pays you a compliment, try just saying “thank you.” It might feel strange at first, but with practice, it gets easier!
Those with low self-worth often feel they need to be perfect in everything they do.
They can spend excessive amounts of time trying to perfect a task, afraid that any mistake will confirm their fears of not being good enough.
Perfectionists set unrealistically high standards for themselves and see anything less than perfect as a failure.
It’s important to strive for excellence, but remember, nobody is perfect and making mistakes is a part of life. It’s how we learn and grow.
Try to embrace your imperfections and see them as opportunities to learn rather than failures.
5. Overemphasis on the Opinions of Others
Some people with low self-worth often place too much importance on what others think of them.
They seek validation and approval from others, rather than finding it within themselves.
Their mood and self-esteem can drastically swing based on the opinions and comments of those around them.
I want you to remember something important: Your value is not determined by someone else’s opinion of you.
You are unique, with your own strengths and abilities.
Yes, it’s nice to be appreciated and complimented by others, but at the end of the day, your self-worth should come from within you.
You are so much more than what others see or say about you.
And if there are people in your life who continuously bring you down, maybe it’s time to reconsider their place in your life.
Surround yourself with positivity and people who lift you up, not tear you down.
6. Avoiding Risks or New Experiences
I’ve noticed that those with low self-worth, including myself in the past, often avoid taking risks or trying new things.
The fear of failure can be overwhelming, making it safer to stick to what’s familiar and comfortable.
I remember a time when I was offered a chance to lead a new project at work.
Instead of jumping at the opportunity, I hesitated. I was scared I wouldn’t be able to handle it, that I’d mess up and everyone would see. So, I initially declined.
But this avoidance behavior stems from not believing in our abilities and fearing that failure will confirm our negative beliefs about ourselves.
What I realized later is that taking risks is a part of life and it’s how we grow and learn. Even if we fail, it’s not a reflection of our worth but rather an opportunity to learn and improve.
So, the next time you’re presented with a new opportunity or challenge, don’t shy away. Believe in yourself and give it a shot! You’re capable of more than you think!
7. Struggling to Express Needs or Boundaries
People who wrestle with low self-worth often have a tough time expressing their needs or setting boundaries.
They might be afraid of coming off as needy, bossy or difficult.
They may let people walk all over them because they’re terrified of confrontation or of being disliked.
It’s like they’ve got a neon sign on their forehead saying, “Take advantage, I won’t stop you.”
And that’s not okay. Not by a long shot.
It’s crucial to respect ourselves enough to say “no” when we need to, and to stand up for ourselves when we’re being treated poorly.
We all have the right to set boundaries and to have our needs met in any relationship – be it personal or professional.
Your feelings and needs are just as important as anyone else’s.
8. Frequently Apologizing
Often, people with low self-worth feel like they’re constantly making mistakes or inconveniencing others.
As a result, they tend to apologize… a lot. Even when they’ve done nothing wrong or it’s a situation that doesn’t warrant an apology.
Women tend to apologize more than men, not because they’re necessarily more polite, but because they tend to perceive more behaviors as offensive or mistake-prone.
The problem with excessive apologizing is that it can undermine your confidence and make you seem less assertive.
While it’s important to say sorry when you’ve genuinely made a mistake or hurt someone, unnecessary apologies can make you seem insecure and can even be annoying to others.
So the next time you find yourself about to apologize for something that isn’t your fault or doesn’t require an apology, try to catch yourself.
Remember, it’s okay to take up space and express your thoughts and feelings without feeling guilty or apologetic.
9. Neglecting Self-Care
This is something I’ve personally dealt with. People with low self-worth often neglect their own needs.
They may ignore their health, skip meals, or consistently miss out on sleep.
They might feel like they don’t deserve to take care of themselves or that their needs are not important.
I used to work long hours without taking breaks, eat whatever was quickest (not healthiest), and push off sleep just to get more done. I thought taking time for myself was selfish and unproductive.
But over time, I realized that neglecting self-care has serious repercussions on physical and mental health.
Taking care of yourself is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. It’s crucial to prioritize your well-being and understand that it’s okay – in fact, necessary – to take time for self-care.
So, if you find yourself neglecting your own needs, remember that you deserve to be taken care of, too. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so make sure you’re filling yours up regularly!