Do you ever feel like your man doesn’t respect you?
I’ve been in that situation and I know it’s not fun.
Fortunately, I found 11 key tips that will make your man show you the respect you deserve and I want to share those with you:
1) Try to understand where his disrespect is coming from
Before you do anything to get your man to respect you, it’s important that you understand why he isn’t respecting you.
Is he insecure?
Does he feel like he provides everything for the household and doesn’t get anything back?
Is there something in his past that makes him feel this way?
Once you understand why he’s being disrespectful, it’ll be easier to deal with.
You see, disrespect is not necessarily something you’re born with, it’s something you learn.
Find out if he doesn’t respect women in general, his partners, or you in particular.
Getting to the root of the problem will make working on it so much easier.
Some common reasons men don’t respect their partners are:
- He doesn’t see you as a person because of the way he was raised.
- He doesn’t see you as a woman that deserves respect.
- He doesn’t see you as someone he wants to spend his life with.
- He’s afraid of getting hurt and doesn’t want to risk it by being vulnerable with you.
- He just thinks that showing females the respect they deserve is too much work and he’s not willing to do it
I know, none of these sound particularly great, do they?
But it’s important for you to understand if you want to get the respect you deserve.
Now: do you want to find out how you can show him that he should respect you?
Let’s look at the next tips:
2) Show him how smart you are
When it comes to respecting you, your man needs to know that he’s not smarter than you.
You should be confident in yourself and show him that you are intelligent and knowledgeable by answering questions, offering advice, and giving constructive criticism.
Even though we live in the 21st century, it’s still a common misconception that women aren’t as smart or capable as men.
Your man needs to know that you’re just as smart as he is and that you can teach him things, too.
When you show him how smart you are, he’ll respect you for it and feel like he can learn from you.
You should also make sure to use your brain when it comes to things that are important to your relationship.
However, when you do all this, make sure to not come across as a know-it-all.
Look at the relationship as a partnership – not as a competition.
You don’t need to make him feel stupid, simply show him that you can support him and offer great advice, too!
This will show him that you’re smart and that you’re trying to help out in the relationship.
You can also make sure to talk about things that are important to him, not just things that interest you.
You see, I know that there are still women out there playing dumb because they believe it will make them more attractive.
The thing is, if a man is intimidated by your intelligence, he’s not the right man for you and you could do so much better!
When you meet the right man, he will love you for how smart you are and that you can even teach him some stuff!
And the best part?
Once he realizes how intelligent you are, he will immediately respect you more.
3) Bring out his inner hero
Yes, I know, you’re probably thinking: “How can bringing out his inner hero help him respect me more??”
Hear me out:
There’s actually a psychological term for what I’m talking about here. It’s called the ‘hero instinct’.
This concept is generating a lot of buzz at the moment as a way to explain what really drives men in relationships.
I know it might all seem kind of silly. In this day and age, women don’t need someone to rescue them. They don’t need a ‘hero’ in their lives.
But this misses the point about what the hero instinct is all about.
The hero instinct is an instinctive need that men have to step up to the plate for the woman in their lives. This is deeply rooted in male biology.
When a man genuinely feels like your everyday hero, he’ll become more loving, respectful, and committed to being in a long-term relationship with you.
But how do you trigger this instinct in him?
The trick is to make him feel like a hero in an authentic way. And there are things you can say and messages you can send to trigger this natural biological instinct.
If you want some help doing this, check out James Bauer’s excellent free video here.
I don’t often recommend videos or buy into popular new concepts in psychology, but the hero instinct is one of the most fascinating concepts I’ve come across.
4) Be proactive and take control
When you’re in a relationship, it’s important to take control of your own life.
You have to make sure that you’re also the one who makes decisions from time to time.
Simply put, you can’t be reactive and let your man dictate everything you do.
Being proactive is an easy way to show him that you want his input but are willing to make the final decision on your own.
But this doesn’t mean you need to make all the huge decisions by yourself, you can start really small, for example, instead of waiting for him to change the light bulb, do it yourself.
When he sees that if needed, you can be independent and proactive, he will immediately respect you more.
Now: that doesn’t mean you have to fully drop into your masculine energy and never let him do anything for you!
Today’s society already forces us to be way more masculine than what feels natural to us.
You have to be able to pull yourself out of that and make sure you’re still feminine.
As women in our feminine energy, it feels good to be taken care of, and you shouldn’t stop that!
In fact, that’s the best way to show him that you’re a great woman: by being feminine while being strong and independent from time to time.
It’ll make him want you even more!
5) Respect yourself!
Do you want my number 1 tip to gain more respect from your partner?
It all starts with respecting yourself.
If you don’t respect yourself, who will?
In order to respect yourself, you will first have to identify in which ways you are not respecting yourself right now.
You can do this through self-reflection, but there are other ways to get the same result.
One way is by asking a close friend or family member.
They will tell you about the things that you do that you don’t like and then you can take action to change them.
This is how we build our self-esteem and how we become more confident in ourselves and in our relationships.
Self-respect and self-love are closely interlinked.
You can’t have one without the other.
It’s important to be yourself, but you also need to respect yourself as well.
Respecting yourself means respecting your body, your time, your boundaries, and your needs.
Let’s start with your body:
Respecting your body means that you take care of it and keep it healthy.
You don’t eat solely unhealthy foods, you don’t eat too much, and you don’t drink too much.
Not only that but also make sure that you’re eating healthy foods and making sure that you’re getting enough nutrients every day.
Move your body and rest when you need it, sleep enough and drink enough water.
Your hygiene and appearance also play a role here. Make sure you keep yourself clean and in a way that you feel good about yourself (whatever that may look like for you)
That is one of the biggest disrespecting things we can do to ourselves: not taking care of our bodies.
In terms of time, make sure that you respect yourself enough not to let other people waste your time.
One of the most important things is respecting your own needs.
The way you meet your needs teaches other people how to treat you.
You can’t expect people to treat you with respect if you don’t show it yourself.
Try to figure out what your needs are and how you can meet them.
Once you respect yourself, your man will see how he is supposed to be treating you!
6) Set clear boundaries
My next tip is about boundaries.
It’s important that you set clear boundaries with your man.
If you don’t, he will assume that you’ll put up with anything just to please him.
That’s not healthy for either of you and will not help you with gaining his respect.
When you’re clear with your boundaries, you show him that you care about yourself as much, or even more than you care about him.
You’re also showing yourself respect by not letting him walk all over you and doing what he wants when he wants.
It’s a great way to get your man to respect you!
But what are good boundaries in a relationship?
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It depends on the couple and how they feel comfortable setting them.
That said, I think it’s important to have boundaries that are noticeable to both of you.
For example, you can tell your man that you don’t want him to go drinking with his female coworker if it makes you uncomfortable.
Or maybe your boundary is that he never raises his voice at you.
Another healthy boundary could be that you need space to hang out with your friends alone and do things you enjoy on your own.
Your boundaries should be clear in your mind so that you can communicate them to your man.
You see, boundaries will look vastly different to every single person because they are very personal.
What’s a boundary for you might not be for a friend of yours.
But why do boundaries help with getting your man to respect you?
Well, when you set clear boundaries you show your man that you know what you want and that you’re not afraid to ask for it.
He’ll see that you’re not someone who will let him treat you badly, and he’ll respect you more for it.
And the best part?
If your man respects you, he’ll be more likely to treat you well.
When two people respect each other, they know how to communicate with each other and can work things out together.
This relates back to what I mentioned earlier: the hero instinct.
When a man is made to feel needed, wanted, and respected, he’s more likely to respect you in return!
And it’s as simple as knowing the right things to say to trigger his hero instinct and make him into the man he’s always wanted to be.
All of that and more is revealed in this excellent free video by James Bauer. It’s absolutely worth checking out if you’re ready to take things to the next level with your man.
7) Know when to apologize (and when not to)
It may sound counterintuitive, but apologizing can make your man respect you more if you do it in the right circumstances.
I know it sounds strange because you’re probably thinking, “I’m the one that’s being disrespected! Why should I apologize?”
But if you think about it, apologizing for things you actually did wrong will tell him that you are willing to admit when you’re wrong and to take responsibility for your actions.
When a woman doesn’t apologize, she looks like she is unwilling to put in any effort.
Notice how I said “things you actually did wrong”?
That’s where this gets a little complicated.
You see, you don’t want to be apologizing for anything and everything.
Excessively apologizing can actually make your man respect you less, believe it or not!
How do you know when to apologize?
If you’re going to apologize, be careful not to apologize too much.
You see, if you’re constantly apologizing for everything, even the things you didn’t do wrong, your man is not going to respect you.
He will know that you will just take the blame for everything anyway.
Don’t apologize for things that truly don’t matter.
Know when to own up to your mistakes.
However, this also means don’t keep apologizing for something and never change your behavior.
You see, we hate when men to this exact thing, so why should we do it?
If you want your man to respect you more, then own up to your mistakes and change the way you act.
This will show him that you’re willing to work toward a better relationship with him, and he’ll be happy to have a partner that’s willing to put in the effort.
Don’t make excuses for your behavior.
There’s a time and place for excuses, but this isn’t it.
In order for a man to respect his woman, he needs to know when she is telling him the truth about something and when she is making an excuse for her behavior.
This will help him understand that he won’t be able to just walk all over you.
8) Communication is key
Communication is one of the most important aspects of a successful relationship.
The more you talk and listen to your man, the better your relationship will be.
Communication is key in resolving issues before they get out of hand.
If you don’t have any communication skills, then you may have to work on those.
You see, if you are able to communicate openly and clearly with your man, he will instantly respect you more because of it.
When you communicate with your man, he will know that the two of you can reach a compromise.
You see, if you don’t communicate with him, then he won’t know how to trust you.
He’ll be hesitant to give in to your demands because he doesn’t know how much or how little of a fight he’ll actually have to put up.
The thing is, a woman who knows how to communicate her feelings and emotions in a productive way is someone a man looks up to and respects.
So, what does that mean for you?
Learn how to communicate effectively!
9) Don’t be a pushover, have your own opinions
When you want your man to respect you, you need to stop being a pushover.
I can’t emphasize enough how important it is that you have your own opinions and speak up when you disagree with something.
When you let him know that you don’t agree with him, and that you will stand your ground, he’ll be more likely to respect you for it.
It’s not about being stubborn and holding on to every little thing that he does wrong, it’s about standing to your beliefs and ideas and not caving in just because you aren’t confident.
Instead of tolerating what he does or saying nothing at all about it, tell him how his actions make you feel and why they affect your relationship in such a negative way.
This will make him realize how his behavior can impact the two of them as a couple.
Also, don’t change your opinions on music, movies, hobbies, etc. just because your man has opposing interests!
Stay true to who you are!
I know that it’s difficult to hold your ground when you’re in a relationship, but it will make him respect you more if you do.
10) Be honest with him
The biggest step to getting your man to respect you is by being honest with him.
Honesty is one of the most important qualities that a man looks for in a woman in order to respect her.
When you’re honest with your man, it shows him that you’re not going to tell him things that are false and just make yourself look better in his eyes.
You see, it’s important that you’re honest about how you feel and what you want.
So if he does something that bothers you, tell him! If he respects your honesty, then he’ll try harder to respect other things like your boundaries.
Also, when he knows you’re honest, he will immediately trust you more, which can help a lot with respect.
Think about it: it’s hard to respect someone who constantly lies, right?
11) Respect him and his opinions
One of the most important things you want to do when you’re trying to get him to respect you is to actually respect him and his opinions.
You see, the saying “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” is not called the golden rule for nothing!
How can you expect respect, if you don’t respect him in return?
What this means is that if you and your man disagree or have different viewpoints, be willing to hear him out.
You may not agree with him, but he deserves a chance to share his thoughts.
You’ll find that doing this will often help both of you come to a better understanding of the situation or perspective.
This will help him feel like he has input in the discussion and it will help you understand where he’s coming from.
Also, don’t ridicule him for things he can’t change or treat him badly.
All those things are signs of disrespect and will essentially just fuel more disrespect towards yourself!
Never lose yourself
No matter what you do, try not to lose yourself in your relationship.
If your man doesn’t show you respect, even though you’ve followed these tips, it might be time to find someone who does.
You see, when you talk to him and let him know how his disrespectful behavior is making you feel and he still doesn’t make an effort, he doesn’t really care about you all that much, sorry.
Whatever you do, stay true to who you are and don’t completely change yourself for any man!
While the tips in this article will help you deal with getting your man to respect you, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.
With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice tailored to the specific issues you’re facing in your love life.
Relationship Hero is a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people navigate complex and difficult love situations, like disrespect. They’re popular because they genuinely help people solve problems.
Why do I recommend them?
Well, after going through difficulties in my own love life, I reached out to them a few months ago.
After feeling helpless for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship, including practical advice on how to overcome the issues I was facing.
I was blown away by how genuine, understanding and professional they were.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice specific to your situation.
How this one revelation changed my love life
It’s Justin Brown here, the co-founder of Ideapod, and I have something to confess…
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