Are you wondering how to make your ex-boyfriend want you back when he has a new girlfriend?
Let’s face it: getting dumped is never easy, but when your ex-boyfriend has a girlfriend, things can get especially tough.
But if you’re planning to win him over, you need to be able to understand his reasons for leaving you for his new girlfriend and make him want you back.
In this article, I’ve listed some of the most important steps to help you make him want you back when he has a girlfriend.
1) Understand his reasons for leaving you for his new girlfriend
Have you ever tried to figure out why your ex-boyfriend left you for a new girlfriend?
I’m sure you’ve thought long and hard about it. But did you actually try to figure out why he left you?
If not, then you need to find out why he chose someone else over you.
Here are some of the possible reasons:
- He felt insecure and thought you were getting too close to him.
- He didn’t like the way you treated him.
- He thought you were too clingy and wanted to move on to someone new.
- He thought she was prettier than you or had better qualities than you did.
- She had a lot more money than you, so she was a better choice for him in the long run.
Whatever the reason, you need to understand why he left you. Why?
Because in order to make him want you back when he already has a new girlfriend, you need to know your advantages and disadvantages compared to her.
Now you probably understand where we’re going with this, right?
Well, remember: the first step to making him want you back is to find out his reasons for leaving you.
2) Don’t sell yourself short
Can I be totally honest with you?
If you’re thinking that getting your ex-boyfriend back when he has a girlfriend is impossible, then you need to think again.
You see, there are tons of women out there who have successfully gotten their ex-boyfriends back after they had girlfriends.
They did so by understanding the reasons why their ex-boyfriends left them and then making themselves attractive enough to get him back.
But you know what?
You really don’t want to sell yourself short.
What I mean here is that he’s the one who left you. So he should be trying to get you back, not you. And that’s why you need to respect yourself and make yourself attractive enough to make him want you back.
So, instead of revealing how you really feel and how much you want to get back together, you need to step back for a while and let him know you don’t care about your past relationship.
That way you’ll make him want you back again.
3) Work on his hero instinct
Believe it or not, one of the main reasons why your boyfriend started a relationship with someone else after your breakup is that being in a relationship makes him feel like a hero.
So guess what?
If you want to make him want you back, then you need to trigger his inner hero.
You see, for guys, it’s all about triggering their inner hero.
I learned about this from the hero instinct. Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept is about what really drives men in relationships—something that is ingrained in their DNA.
And it’s something most women don’t know anything about.
Once triggered, these drivers make men into the heroes of their own lives. They feel better, love harder, and commit more strongly when they find someone who knows how to trigger it.
Now, you may be wondering why it’s called “the hero instinct”? Do guys really need to feel like superheroes to commit to a woman?
Not at all. Forget about Marvel. You won’t need to play the damsel in distress or buy your man a cape.
The easiest thing to do is to check out James Bauer’s excellent free video here. He shares some easy tips to get you started, such as sending your ex-boyfriend a 12-word text that will trigger his hero instinct right away.
Because that’s the beauty of the hero instinct.
It’s only a matter of knowing the right things to say to make him realize that he wants you back again, even when he has a girlfriend.
4) Show him that you’re a completely different person now
I know that this is going to sound a bit weird, but I’ve learned from experience that the best way to make your ex-boyfriend want you back again is to show him how much you’ve changed since he last saw you.
Why am I saying this?
Well, if you think about it, the reason why your relationship hasn’t worked out is that either of you didn’t like your partner anymore.
And if he was the one who felt bored of your relationship, he might think that it’s because of the fact that your personality isn’t compatible with his.
So, the only way to reignite his interest in you is to show him that you’ve changed for the better.
You see, it’s about giving him something that he wants.
And if you can give it to him, then he will be motivated enough to want you back again.
So how do you achieve this? Well, I’ve found that taking some time off from a relationship is the best way to show your ex-boyfriend how much better of a person you are now.
You see, when a guy sees that you’ve changed and become more confident and successful since he last saw you, he’ll feel motivated enough to want a second chance with you again.
5) Identify what makes him feel loved when he is with his girlfriend
Have you already figured out what is so special about him and his new girlfriend that makes him feel loved?
Maybe she treats him like a king and cooks his favorite meals for him?
What’s more likely is that she’s always there to listen to him when he feels down. Or she’s always there to give him a shoulder to cry on when he has a problem at work.
Whatever it is, you need to find out what it is that makes him feel loved.
Because your ex-boyfriend may still be falling in love with you even though he has a new girlfriend if you show him that you can also take care of his emotional needs and make him feel loved.
So, I’ve got one piece of advice for you: figure out what it is that makes him feel loved by his girlfriend, and then show him how you can provide a better kind of love than his girlfriend does.
Because if you can identify this, then you’ll be able to get his attention once again.
6) Make it clear your feelings haven’t changed
Have you ever thought about telling him directly that he still means something to you and showing him that your feelings haven’t changed?
Well, the key to making your ex-boyfriend want you back when he has a girlfriend is to let him know that you still have feelings for him; and
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Suffering from Empty and Draining Relationships?
The legendary shaman Rudá Iandê reveals the 3 most important factors to healthy and loving relationships (and to experience them right now).
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For example, you might tell him: “You’re still the most amazing person in the world. I just can’t help but feel this way about you. ”
This will make it clear that your feelings haven’t changed.
And it will also show him how much he means to you, too. And really, what more could a guy want than to know that his ex still feels the same way about him?
After all, the breakup is probably still fresh in his mind, and he might be having second thoughts about the choice he made.
Tell him that you miss him and want to know what happened between the two of you. Then listen closely to his answer and ask more questions if necessary.
But remember: don’t appear too needy. That way, you’ll also make it clear that you’re still in control.
7) Show him that you respect his decision
If you’re still interested in making your ex-boyfriend want you back no matter what he does, then you’ll have to show him that you respect his decision of being with someone else.
Because if you need to make him want you back, then you need to show him that you maintain a healthy attitude towards his new relationship.
You might even have to encourage and support your ex’s new relationship.
If you don’t respect his decision, then the chances of him becoming interested in you again are very small.
So, if he’s with her now, then show a clear attitude of respecting his decision:
“I respect that you have decided to spend more time with her. And I hope that you’re happy together.”
This will definitely show him that you’re not trying to make him feel guilty about being with her and that your ex-boyfriend still means a lot to you. So, it will make him want to win back your love again.
This relates back to the unique concept I mentioned earlier: the hero instinct.
When a man feels respected, useful, and needed, he’s more likely to commit and try to get you back.
And the best part is, that triggering his hero instinct can be as simple as knowing the right thing to say over a text.
You can learn exactly what to do by watching this simple and genuine video by James Bauer.
8) Don’t pay too much attention to his new relationship
If you and your ex-boyfriend are still keeping in touch, the best way to make him want you back is to ignore his new relationship completely.
Just pretend that his new girlfriend doesn’t even exist. Why?
Because if you pay too much attention to his new relationship, then you’ll have the urge to go back to your ex-boyfriend simply because he’s not paying attention to you.
And this will only serve as a reminder that he has a new girlfriend. And that, in turn, will make him want you back even more.
But you know what?
You’re not doing this because you don’t want to make him feel bad about his relationship.
No, instead you’re intentionally not paying too much attention to what he’s doing with his new girlfriend because you still want him back.
So, keep tabs on his woman, but don’t go overboard: just check in with her every now and then to know how they’re doing together.
And remember: don’t let on how much you care about her.
9) Try not to appear too needy
Frankly, this step is more important than you might think.
Why am I so sure?
Well, if you’re looking particularly desperate, it will make him want to run for the hills.
And this is because asking for his attention when there’s someone else involved will make it look as if you need him more than ever.
And even if you want him so badly, you need to know that letting him know this directly won’t make him want you back:
You’ll just seem desperate, needy, and clingy.
But here’s how you can make yourself more attractive in his eyes without seeming desperate:
Show him that you’re better off without him. Show him that you don’t need him to want to be with you.
So, try to make sure that whatever you do, he doesn’t have the impression that you’re being needy and desperate.
10) Take things into your hands
Okay, time for the last step.
You’ve done all the things I’ve suggested to you, and now what? Well, at this point, you have to do something about it.
And here’s what:
Be absolutely sure that the new girlfriend is not an option in your ex-boyfriend’s life any longer. That’s a pretty good starting point.
If he is continuing to talk about her, then it means that he still cares more about her than he does about you.
And that clearly makes him vulnerable to you again—after all, she’s gone and so are his feelings for her!
And if he still has feelings for her when he is with his girlfriend then how will he get them out of his system? The answer: by making sure she’s not an option again-for him anyway.
So, just take things into your hands and make sure that he’s not going to think about her anymore.
How? By getting close to him again. Careful, though: don’t rush this step and make him feel like you’re begging for his attention.
Instead, simply be there for him and do whatever you can for him to help clear these feelings from his system. After all, you don’t want him to have those feelings for the new girlfriend if he’s with you again!
So, act naturally and continue to be there for him even when the conversation is about someone else.
Hopefully, you already have some ideas about things you should do when you’re trying to make him want you back when he has a girlfriend.
So the key now is getting through to your ex-boyfriend in a way that empowers both him and you.
I mentioned the concept of the hero instinct earlier — by appealing directly to his primal instincts, you won’t only solve this issue, but you’ll take your relationship further than ever before.
And since this free video reveals exactly how to trigger your man’s hero instinct, you could make this change as early as today.
With James Bauer’s incredible concept, he’ll see you as the only woman for him. So if you’re ready to take that plunge, be sure to check out the video now.
How this one revelation changed my love life
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I used to believe I needed to be successful before I deserved to find someone who could love me.
I used to believe there was a “perfect person” out there and I just had to find them.
I used to believe I would finally be happy once I found “the one”.
What I now know is that these limiting beliefs were stopping me from building deep and intimate relationships with the people I was meeting. I was chasing an illusion that was leading me to loneliness.
If you want to change anything in your life, one of the most effective ways is to change your beliefs.
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Justin Brown, Ideapod Founder