Many women find themselves in this situation on a regular basis.
Whether it’s infidelity or something else, the pain of betrayal is one thing we never want to go through again.
But that doesn’t mean we’re out of options when it comes to getting someone back after they’ve done you wrong.
Here are 10 tips for making him want you back after cheating.
1) Induce a grand gesture
After a man has cheated on you, he’s probably beating himself up with guilt.
So before you go crawling back to him on all fours and begging him to take you back, it’s important that he feels the weight of his actions and takes responsibility for them.
That means he needs to make some sort of grand gesture so he can get a true sense of how much his infidelity hurt you.
The fact that he cheated and lied to you will be enough to make him feel bad, but the guilt won’t be strong enough if he doesn’t take his actions further.
Here are some grand gestures you can suggest to him:
- He can write a letter expressing how much he hated being dishonest to you and your relationship
- He can tell all of his friends that he screwed up by cheating on you and that he completely regrets it
- He can turn his cheating into a positive experience by donating money to an organization that promotes women’s rights and equality, or by speaking at high schools about the dangers of infidelity, etc.
Once he’s come up with a grand gesture and you’ve agreed on it, make sure he holds himself accountable to the agreement.
Don’t help him out if he isn’t causing enough pain in his own mind.
2) Play hard to get
A man who has cheated on you probably hasn’t been able to control his actions, so dealing with him will likely be a struggle.
That’s why it’s important that you not come back to him immediately and beg for him to take you back.
Rather, tell him that you’re going to be cold and distant from now on because he made a mistake and that he needs to have the guts to do something about it.
Trust me, it’s an old cliché, but it works.
A guy wants a challenge to get a girl, and the harder you make it for him to get his way, the less inclined he’ll be to stray.
3) Trigger his inner hero
Here’s the truth:
Many guys have a deep-seated desire to be a hero.
In other words, they want to go above and beyond what’s expected of them in order to prove themselves as someone worthy of being loved.
You see, for guys, it’s all about triggering their inner hero.
I learned about this from the hero instinct. Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept is about what really drives men in relationships, which is ingrained in their DNA.
And it’s something most women don’t know anything about.
Once triggered, these drivers make men into the heroes of their own lives. They feel better, love harder, and commit stronger when they find someone who knows how to trigger it.
Now, you may be wondering why it’s called “the hero instinct”? Do guys really need to feel like superheroes to commit to a woman?
Not at all. Forget about Marvel. You won’t need to play the damsel in distress or buy your man a cape.
The easiest thing to do is to check out James Bauer’s excellent free video here. He shares some easy tips to get you started, such as sending him a 12-word text that will trigger his hero instinct right away.
Because that’s the beauty of the hero instinct.
It’s only a matter of knowing the right things to say to make him realize that he wants you and only you.
4) Make him feel like he owes you
After a man has cheated on you, it can sometimes feel like there’s some sort of debt that needs to be repaid.
And while it’s nice to get a big apology and take him back, that might not be the best thing for your relationship at this point.
In fact, you might want to consider using the “paying-back-the-debt” mentality to your advantage.
For example, you can tell him that you’re willing to give him another chance, but that he needs to do some work in order to earn your trust again.
And how does that work?
He’ll start to view you as an equal rather than a possession and he’ll be much more inclined to respect your wishes and make you happy.
The more he feels like he owes you, the more likely he will do whatever it takes to make up for his mistake and make sure it never happens again in the first place.
Don’t worry, this isn’t a scheming mindset.
5) Be irresistible
Here’s the thing:
There are also some men out there who will cheat on their women even if it isn’t in their nature.
They feel trapped and aren’t happy, so they seek out a person who is willing to give them some excitement and attention.
Breaking up with him is probably not an option for you, but you can make sure he doesn’t follow through on his cheating ways by being as attractive, desirable, and irresistible as possible.
So how can you do that?
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Suffering from Empty and Draining Relationships?
The legendary shaman Rudá Iandê reveals the 3 most important factors to healthy and loving relationships (and to experience them right now).
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Here are some tips:
- Improve your body: It’s important to look good for him. Men always appreciate very pretty women, so don’t let yourself go completely.
- Work on your mental toughness: Men like the strong and independent type, even if they don’t always act that way. Make sure you’re more of a fighter than he is.
- Confidence: You need to be confident and assertive around him.
- Dress well: Don’t let yourself go completely. Show that you still look good enough for your man.
- Be a positive person: Make sure everything you do is in good spirits.
- Look out for yourself: Take care of your needs and be sure to meet your own needs so he can see that you can take care of yourself.
6) Show up to parties uninvited and mingle with the people he knows
If he’s cheating on you, chances are he’ll be around people who know him.
And that means you need to be able to talk to anyone who crosses your path and make some new friends of your own in the process.
Be the first one to show up at a party or event and make an impression on everyone there.
Your man may not enjoy watching you mingle and talk to other people, but it’ll be a reminder that you could easily get another guy if he ever tries to hurt you again.
Plus, it’ll give him some serious competition and remind him why he fell in love with you in the first place.
7) Make him feel like he is a safe person to open up to
One of the best ways to get a man who has cheated on you back is to make him feel safe with you again.
That’s because if he truly feels like he can’t talk to you about anything, it’s just a matter of time before he starts looking for someone who will listen.
Now, how do you make him feel safe?
Well, this relates back to the unique concept I mentioned earlier: the hero instinct.
When a man feels respected, useful, and needed, he’s more likely to come back because he feels like he’s been given the chance to win your heart again.
And the best part is, triggering his hero instinct can be as simple as knowing the right thing to say over a text.
You can learn exactly what to do by watching this simple and genuine video by James Bauer.
8) Plant the seed of doubt in his head
If you’ve learned one thing from this article, it’s that there’s a scientific way to make a man who cheats on you come back to you.
But, like anything in life, it takes work.
So wouldn’t it be easier to just forget about the whole cheating thing and move on?
Not at all.
Planting the seed of doubt in his head that he could lose you is actually one of the most powerful tools at your disposal.
For instance, you could find a way to let him know that you can just walk away from the relationship and he’ll be stuck with the bill.
Or you could remind him that you’re a very happy and fun person in your life, so if he doesn’t make some serious changes, he’ll just be wasting his time by sticking around.
It will make him feel insecure and keep him worrying about whether or not you’ll stay with him.
And that’s just a good thing because it’ll make him want to change whatever it is that he’s doing wrong.
9) Offer to help him reflect on his past mistakes
I mentioned this earlier, but it’s worth repeating:
If you want to make a man who has cheated on you come back to you, it’s important that he learns from his past mistakes.
He needs to know that it could happen again and he could lose the only person he’s ever loved.
To accomplish this, all you have to do is make a small suggestion that gets him thinking about how his actions have affected others in the past.
This will cause him to start questioning himself and change his behavior for the better, which will make him want to be a better version of himself.
10) Create a sense of urgency
He’s already cheated on you once and he could do it again.
That’s why it’s so important to remember that the clock is ticking on this relationship.
You need to make sure that he feels a sense of urgency in your relationship so he begins to question everything he has.
If you give him a deadline, it’ll force him to wonder if he wants to be with you or not.
That might be hard to do, but it could lead to some good outcomes in your relationship down the line.
I know this isn’t the easiest thing for you to do, but I promise it’s worth the trouble.
He’s going to keep messing up over and over again if you don’t make him feel like he has no other choice.
By now you should have a better idea of how to make him want you back after he cheated.
So the key now is getting through to your man in a way that empowers both him and you.
I mentioned the concept of the hero instinct earlier — by appealing directly to his primal instincts, you won’t only solve this issue, but you’ll take your relationship further than ever before.
And since this free video reveals exactly how to trigger your man’s hero instinct, you could make this change as early as today.
With James Bauer’s incredible concept, he’ll see you as the only woman for him. So if you’re ready to take that plunge, be sure to check out the video now.
How this one revelation changed my love life
It’s Justin Brown here, the co-founder of Ideapod, and I have something to confess…
I used to believe I needed to be successful before I deserved to find someone who could love me.
I used to believe there was a “perfect person” out there and I just had to find them.
I used to believe I would finally be happy once I found “the one”.
What I now know is that these limiting beliefs were stopping me from building deep and intimate relationships with the people I was meeting. I was chasing an illusion that was leading me to loneliness.
If you want to change anything in your life, one of the most effective ways is to change your beliefs.
Unfortunately, it’s not an easy thing to do.
I’m lucky to have worked directly with the shaman Rudá Iandê in changing my beliefs about love. Doing so has changed my life forever.
Now, Rudá’s teachings can change your life, too.
As the co-founder of Ideapod, I’m in a unique position to be able to bring Rudá’s teachings to our global community.
We do this by promoting his masterclasses.
One of the most powerful masterclasses he has is the love and intimacy masterclass. In this class, Rudá breaks down his key lessons on cultivating healthy and nurturing relationships in your life.
Thousands of people have already let me know that this masterclass has changed their love lives for the better.
Justin Brown, Ideapod Founder