After you’ve had sex with a player, it can be hard to get him to want more from you. And that’s because he sees you as nothing more than another notch on his bedpost.
But make no mistake about it – players have their reasons for being the way they are.
This also means that there are ways for you to change his mind! Here are 13 ways to make a player fall in love with you:
1) Show him your worth through your actions
You can’t expect a player to fall in love with you if you don’t even like yourself.
And so the first thing you have to do is start loving yourself.
After all, most players are into you because they see something in you that they like.
That might be your amazing personality, your beautiful looks, your great sense of humour, or your intelligence.
And it’s important that you show that to him through your actions every single day.
If you’re not happy with your job, then you need to find a new one.
If you’re not happy with your weight, then you need to start eating healthy and exercising.
Let’s say you’re not happy with your friends, then you need to stop hanging out with them.
If you’re not happy with the way you’re living your life, then you need to change it.
There is nothing that will instantly make a player fall in love with you more than seeing you happy with yourself.
Because when you like yourself more, you’ll be a lot less desperate to be with him.
And no matter how charming or you are, a desperate woman will never win over a player.
Trust me, desperation doesn’t look good on anyone.
The thing is, when you are desperate, you will immediately push him away. That is exactly the type of woman a player does not want to be with, you see.
Instead, you need to show him that you’re not desperate, but that you are worth it.
If you’re looking for a new job, then look for one. If you’re looking for new clothes, then get them!
And if you’re looking to get more out of life, then do it!
The more confident and happy you are with yourself and the way your life is going, the less a player will care about being with you.
And if he can’t see that in yourself, then there’s no point in even trying to woo him. Because he has no interest in keeping company with someone who doesn’t like herself.
You see, when you show in your actions that you respect yourself, he will have no choice but to respect you, too.
2) Find out why he is a player
A player may have been out with many women in the past, but that doesn’t mean he’s a bad person.
It just means he was looking for something that he hadn’t been able to find with those women.
So before you write him off as a total jerk, it’s important that you find out why he’s a player.
Maybe he’s been hurt in the past, maybe he has issues with his self-confidence, maybe he’s had some really bad experiences with women in the past, or maybe he has trust issues.
There can be any number of reasons why he is the way he is, and until you find out what they are, you can’t hope to make him change.
You should talk to him about his past experiences. Ask him what he’s looking for in a relationship.
Find out what he needs from a woman in order to trust her. Only then will you be able to figure out what is causing him to be a player and change it.
Now: a lot of the time, a player is the way he is because past experiences have taught him it is safer to see women as objects than to get emotionally involved.
That is what he has learned to do.
And that is why he is a player.
But, on the other hand, sometimes it could be that he wants something from you and you don’t realize it.
That’s when you have to look deeper into his actions and ask yourself: Why does he keep sleeping with women?
Why does he keep coming over to my apartment and why does he have issues?
You see, it’s easy to get played by a player, but that doesn’t mean you should be.
When a player comes on too strong, when his intentions are not clear, then it can be your fault for not noticing what is happening.
If you are intelligent enough to spot a player’s intentions, then you will also be intelligent enough to see through them if they turn out to be false.
But if you don’t notice that things aren’t right between the two of you, then all kinds of drama will happen.
And that doesn’t work out well for anyone in the end.
So watch out! When a player is only wanting you for one thing, stop him in his tracks right away by showing him that there’s nothing going on between the two of you and that you will need a little more than that.
Now: if you want to find out why a player is the way he is, that will be a bit difficult at first, not gonna lie.
Most players are skilled in avoiding to talk about themselves, especially with women they are interested in.
The trick is to find out what he’s hiding and get him to open up.
First, you have to figure out what he’s looking for in a relationship.
You have to know why he is the way he is so that you can figure out what you can do to change his behavior and make him see that there’s something better than a player in your life.
And once you do all of that, then the real fun will begin!
Here I want to mention that you will not be able to change every player.
Some guys will just be wasted time for you, unfortunately.
3) Break free from self-sabotaging ideas of love
Sometimes, we have self-sabotaging ideas of love that can make relationships turn into a nightmare.
But that raises the question:
Why does love so often start out great, only to become a nightmare?
And what’s the solution to making a player fall in love with you?
The answer is contained in the relationship you have with yourself.
I learned about this from the renowned shaman Rudá Iandê. He taught me to see through the lies we tell ourselves about love, and become truly empowered.
As Rudá explains in this mind-blowing free video, love is not what many of us think it is. In fact, many of us are actually self-sabotaging our love lives without realizing it!
We need to face the facts about players.
Far too often we chase an idealized image of someone and build up expectations that are guaranteed to be let down.
Far too often we fall into codependent roles of savior and victim to try to “fix” our partner, only to end up in a miserable, bitter routine.
Far too often, we are on shaky ground with our own selves and this carries over into toxic relationships that become hell on earth.
Rudá’s teachings showed me a whole new perspective.
While watching, I felt like someone understood my struggles to find love for the first time – and finally offered an actual, practical solution to make a player fall in love.
If you’re done with unsatisfying dating, empty hookups, frustrating relationships, and having your hopes dashed over and over, then this is a message you need to hear.
4. Be yourself and don’t settle for less than you deserve in a relationship
Players often go after women who are very confident and independent.
Think about what attracts you to a man – it’s usually his confidence and charm.
So if you’re trying to make a player fall in love with you, be yourself.
Don’t try to pretend to be someone else. It will only backfire and make him lose interest in you even faster.
Also, don’t settle for less than you deserve in a relationship.
If you’re interested in a long-term relationship with him, then don’t pretend that you aren’t.
If you don’t trust him, then don’t give him the chance to break your heart.
If he’s not the right guy for you, then don’t settle for him just because he’s interested in you.
You see, one thing that makes the game so easy for players is that, unfortunately, lots of women don’t have very high standards.
So if you’re interested in a player, don’t settle for anything less than what you deserve.
If he can’t provide something that you need, then he’s not the one for you.
You see, you already slept with him, which means that you kind of already gave into his charms, but it’s okay.
Now you need to recenter yourself, however, and don’t give him any more satisfaction that doesn’t also meet your standards.
This sudden challenge will intrigue him and make him want to get to know you better, which is exactly what you want.
The thing is, when a woman has high standards and boundaries, she might be afraid of pushing some people away because of that but guess what?
That’s actually a good thing!
Think about it: all these people that your standards are pushing away were just in the way of the people who deserve you to be with you.
Now: when a player realizes that you have high standards and he can’t just get away with minimal effort, there is a good chance that that will actually make him interested.
So if you want to make a player fall in love with you, be confident and independent.
Also, don’t give him the chance to break your heart.
If he’s not the right guy for you, then don’t settle for him just because he’s interested in you.
5) Let him see the real you
One of the best ways to make a player fall in love with you is to let him see the real you.
If you’re trying to make a player fall in love with you, but then he sees you at your worst and at your most vulnerable, it will really surprise him and make him want to be around you more.
Of course, you don’t want to let him see you at your worst too soon, but if he’s been seeing you for a while and you’ve been hiding parts of yourself from him, then it’s time to let him see the real you.
Let him see the parts of you that you’ve been trying to keep hidden from him.
Let him see your vulnerabilities.
You can even let him see you when you’re not at your best.
He’ll appreciate that you’re letting him in, and he’ll see that you’re not perfect either.
You see, a player often puts on a facade when he is doing his thing, because he doesn’t want to be vulnerable.
Most of the girls he sleeps with will probably do the exact same.
Now, if you actually are real with him and show him some quirks of yours, that might actually inspire him to open up, too.
This will also set you apart from everyone else.
He may even want to help you through difficult situations, which will make him want to protect you and take care of you more.
6) Be Confident
If you’re trying to make a player fall in love with you, then you’ve got to be confident.
It can be tempting to act like you’re not interested in him – especially if he’s giving you a hard time.
But it’s important that you act confident around him.
Don’t let him see you sweat. Don’t let him see you flounder. Don’t let him see you act unsure of yourself.
If you do, then he’ll see you as nothing more than a pushover who he can take advantage of.
When he sees that you’re confident, he’ll see that you’re not someone who is willing to be walked all over.
And that will make him want to impress you because he’ll want to show you that he can be strong and independent.
So: don’t act insecure around him. Don’t act like you don’t know what he wants from you.
You want him to see you as someone who is confident in your own skin, but also someone who is willing to take charge in the relationship and not be completely dominated by him.
This will be intriguing to him, and he’ll want to know more about you.
And that’s how you can make him fall in love with you.
Confidence is incredibly attractive.
7) Stop being needy
As I’ve already said, players are usually attracted to you because of your looks, personality, or intelligence.
But it’s also important that you take care of yourself as well.
After all, a player will never fall in love with you if he feels like he’s constantly taking care of you.
And what I mean by that is that you need to stop being needy.
Don’t come on too strong and don’t expect him to take care of everything for you.
Let him be the man and show him that you know how to take care of yourself as well!
You see, there is almost nothing a player despises more than having to care for a woman who is being super needy.
He is afraid of commitment if you couldn’t tell, and being needy is asking for lots of commitment.
Sure, further down the line once he actually falls in love with you, he will want to take care of you, but until then, he’s afraid of being trapped.
And that’s why you want to stop being needy.
If you’re needy, then he’ll see you as someone who is easy to trap.
And if he sees you as someone that is easy to trap, then he will be less likely to fall in love with you.
So: stop being needy. Don’t expect him to take care of everything for you.
Instead, act like the independent woman that you are! Be your own person and show him that you can take care of yourself!
8) Satisfy his mind
Players usually have lots of people who will help them satisfy their bodily needs, which is why you will need to do the opposite and satisfy their mind, instead.
You see, if you want a player to fall in love with you, then you have to find a way to get him to have deep conversations with you.
A lot of the time, players crave exactly that – a meaningful conversation with a woman.
In fact, it’s actually what they look for in a relationship.
And if you can find a way to make him talk to you without being needy, then you will have done what is most important in a relationship – satisfy his mind!
You see, the mind is always looking for something new and different. It’s constantly on the lookout for new information and experiences that it can absorb.
And if you can give him this new information or experience by talking with him, then he will fall in love with you because he feels like he’s found something new and exciting.
All the women he is usually with will probably be limited to small talk and then that’s it.
But if you can get him to actually talk about more meaningful things with you, then you are on the right track to him falling in love with you.
And if he falls in love with you, then he will want to commit to you and start a relationship with you.
9) Be desirable
Okay, this one is sort of a no-brainer, but if you want a player to fall in love with you, then you will have to let him know that you are desirable.
In other words, you have to make yourself look so hot that he can’t help but want to be with you.
And the way to do this is by showing him that you are confident in who you are and what makes you attractive to other people.
If a player sees a girl who is insecure and doesn’t know what she really wants out of life, then he will think that she is not attractive and probably won’t want to be with her.
But if he sees someone who knows exactly what she wants out of life and how she wants it, then he will see her as desirable and almost irresistible.
So: show him that you know what makes you attractive! Be confident in yourself! Be sexy! Be your own person! And he will fall in love with you as a result!
Now, there are countless ways you can do that, the most important is honestly just your own confidence here.
However, you can do a bunch of things that might make you feel better about yourself and make you look better, such as:
- working out
- getting a new haircut
- trying a new makeup look
- buying an outfit you feel great in
- getting your nails done
You see, when you take care of your appearance, you immediately seem more attractive to men.
This is obviously due to the visual aspect of it all, but it’s not just that.
The thing is, a woman who takes care of herself shows that she respects herself.
Plus, you will also get the attention of other men, which might make your player a little jealous!
So, if you want to attract the attention of a player and make him fall in love with you, then you need to work on your appearance.
10) Don’t pressure him
This one’s important.
If you want a player to fall in love with you, the last thing you want to do is pressure him into doing so.
Because if you do, he will see right through you and probably just try to get away from you as fast as possible.
So, the last thing that you want to do is start pressuring him or making him feel like he has to fall in love with you.
What I mean by this is that if a guy doesn’t want to be with a girl, then he won’t be!
And if he doesn’t want to be with a girl, then it’s pretty unlikely that he will fall in love with her, especially if she pressures him into it.
Being pressured into liking someone does the exact opposite of what you want, and it’s way better to ease off and give him some space.
You see, when you pressure a guy, it makes him feel like he has to do something.
And if he doesn’t want to do something, then that’s the last thing he wants to do.
So instead of pressuring him into liking you, it’s better to ease off and give him some space to get over his feelings for you if they’re there.
11) Don’t sleep with him again (for now)
Alright, so you slept with him already, and while that’s not ideal for the situation, my biggest advice is to not sleep with him again for the time being.
You see, players get a thrill out of the chase, but if they get what they want from a woman, they might just get bored with her.
Now. apart from that, there is also the other issue. A player will not respect you if he knows he can get with you whenever he wants.
This is why you need to cut him off from being able to have sex with you for now.
The thing is when you do that and you set up some boundaries that show that you will not sleep with him again until he treats you better, then he will be interested.
But if you just let him have sex with you whenever he wants, then he will start to see you as something that can be used and thrown away.
And it’s much better if a guy respects you than a guy who sees you as a disposable item that can be used up whenever he wants!
And the best part?
Standing up for yourself like that and knowing your worth is the best way to a player’s heart – he will realize that he needs to put in some work for you!
12) Surprise him with your honesty and openness
One of the biggest things that will turn a player off is if he thinks he can’t trust you and that you are closed off.
And if you’re trying to make a player fall in love with you, trust is one of the most important things.
The best way to surprise him with your honesty and openness is to come right out and ask him what he’s looking for with you.
Ask him what he expects from a woman.
Ask him what his expectations are.
You could even ask him why he’s a player!
Sure, you don’t want to do this during a first date or anything like that.
But after you’ve spent some more time with him and you’ve really gotten to know each other a bit, it’s a great way to start a serious conversation.
Don’t let your pride get in the way of you trying to make a relationship with a player work.
If he sees you as a challenge, then he’ll respect you for being honest with him.
If he sees you as weak and not worth his time because you try to hide your true feelings, then he’ll walk all over you.
Now: this only works if your honest and open conversation also means that you come across as confident and sure of yourself.
Don’t just beg him to open up to you, he will not respect that.
You have to show him that you have confidence and that you know what you’re talking about.
13) Don’t be overly available
If you’re always available to a player, then he’ll never appreciate you more.
It may seem like being available would make him want you more, but it actually has the opposite effect.
If he knows that you’re always available, he’ll know that he can take you for granted.
He’ll know that you’ll always be there for him, and he won’t appreciate you nearly as much as he would if you were a little more elusive.
Although it can be tempting to be available to him all the time, it’s important that you keep him on his toes.
You don’t have to disappear and never be seen around him, but you do have to avoid being overly available.
Being available all of the time means that he doesn’t have to try to earn your time. And when he has to work for something, he’ll appreciate it that much more.
This ties back in with the high standards we were talking about earlier.
The more available you are to him, the more you are lowering your standards – there is minimal effort needed for you to be with him.
Now: you probably need to find a good balance, because you don’t want to shut him out completely, or he’ll probably just go find someone else.
The key is to balance it just right.
If you’re too available, he’ll start to feel like you’re acting like his girlfriend, and you won’t be able to get him to fall in love with you.
But if you’re not available enough, he’ll start thinking that you don’t care about him at all, and he’ll go find another girl who’s more into him.
Now: The most important thing is to simply not be available to him 24/7, and especially, to not reply if all he does is send you booty calls at 2 in the morning.
That is how you also set your standards – either he formally asks you out, or you’re not interested.
You got this
By now you should have a good idea of how to make a player fall in love with you after sleeping with him.
But, if nothing works, there’s something else you can try.
According to relationship expert James Bauer, every man – player or not – reacts positively if you trigger his hero instinct.
This is a unique concept that has revolutionized the way we understand how men think and feel in relationships. It shows that when you trigger a man’s innate drives, he feels better about himself and he’ll naturally begin to associate those good feelings with you.
What’s more, if you succeed, all his emotional walls will come down. And that would be exactly what a player needs in order to settle down and commit to just one woman.
So if you’re ready to make him fall in love with you – even if he’s a player and you already slept with him- be sure to check out James Bauer’s incredible advice.