How do you know if you like someone? 17 ways to tell for sure

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Have you met a guy or girl whose smile makes your life a little bit brighter?

If so, it’s an exciting time.

The question is: how much do you really like this person?

Will it last, or is it just a temporary flash in the pan?

How do you know if you like someone? 17 ways to tell for sure

1) You care about what they say

How do you know if you like someone?

Let me count the ways.

For one thing, if you’re really interested in someone, then you’re going to care about what he or she says.

Even if their interests are different than yours, they will pique your interest and leave you wide-eyed.

Their intellect and ideas will entrance you.

Their speech will stick in your head, and comments they make will matter a lot more to you than what the average guy or girl says who you meet.

It’s not that you’re obsessed – although that’s possible – it’s just that their words and the way they say them begin to have a lot of weight for you.

As Katie Uniacke says:

“If you don’t know his surname and haven’t discussed your pasts, your jobs, your dreams, or your families, it’ll be pretty hard to know who he really is.

“But if you’ve found that the two of you have naturally started to open up to each other about deeper things and you like what you’ve discovered about him so far, that’s an excellent sign that your feelings could be genuine.”

2) You think about them a lot

The second sign you like this individual for real is that you think about them a lot.

When I say a lot, what I mean is that you think of him on an ongoing basis throughout the day.

If your job is busy that could limit exactly how much time you can afford to daydream about this new romance opportunity.

But suffice to say they’ll be on your mind more than just occasionally.

And when they do enter your mind, you’ll feel a warm and fuzzy feeling.

One of the top ways to tell if you like someone on a deeper basis is that thinking of them never gets old.

You can picture their smile, the funny joke they told last week, or the way they felt resting against your shoulder and you just sit with those memories.

Then you start craving more of them.

Because every time you meet it’s a new chance to produce more material to think about…

This new love interest is definitely on your mind in a big way.

3) You try to maximize your time around them

If you’re looking for a reliable sign that you’re into this person, then look at your own actions and how they relate to spending time with them.

When you’re interested in someone you want to spend as much time with them as possible.

That could be doing fun things like going for a hike or taking a dog for a walk, but it can also be something simple like making some popcorn and settling down for a movie on Saturday afternoon.

There’s no bare minimum of what you need to do in order for it to be quality time.

You just want it to be with them.

And when it’s with him and near them and talking to them then you enjoy it.

You’ll also become a professional at thinking of reasons you should spend time together.

“You may start thinking of ways to be near them, too, which can include taking up their interests in the hope it could help strengthen the fledgling bond between you,” writes Olivia Petter.

Keep in mind that while you maximize the time you spend with them, you shouldn’t minimize the time you spend with yourself.

This is something I learned from the renowned shaman Rudá Iandê. In this mind-blowing free video, he taught me to see through the lies we tell ourselves about love, and become truly empowered.

But the key to true happiness is the relationship you have with yourself.

I mean, how can you fix the external without seeing the internal first? 

On the other hand, focusing on yourself is a great way to increase the intimacy level in your relationship.

If this sounds impressive, then maybe you should also watch Rudá’s free incredible masterclass:

Check out the free video here.

You’ll find practical solutions and much more in Rudá’s powerful video, solutions that’ll stay with you for life.

4) You find them hilarious

Another one of the top signs that you like someone beyond the superficial is that their sense of humor appeals to you.

Everyone may tickle your funny bone at some time or another.

But the guy or girl who you like, positively gets you rolling on the ground with their sense of humor.

You don’t have to feign your enthusiasm around them, because the way they see the world, life, romance and everything in between really speaks to you.

In fact, comedy and other funny people may start to pale in comparison.

Because this person’s brand of humor is so much more enjoyable to you.

There’s just no amount of jokes of theirs that get old.

It keeps rolling, and when you’re together the chemistry seems to be a perfect brew of laughter and fascination.

This special person makes you laugh all the way down to your heart.

And that’s a beautiful thing.

5) You have to stop yourself from cheering every time they text or call

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Another one of the key signs that you like someone is that whenever they contact you then you feel a surge of adrenaline and euphoria.

You’re so glad they’re reaching out to you that it’s hard to push down the cheer that wants to come out.

When you see a new text you practically jump at it.

It’s hard not to start pounding the touchscreen like a Pavlovian response before you even think about it.

This can start to come across as desperate or give them all the power, which is why it’s important to develop and improve your text game.

Nonetheless, that instinct to answer right away and that great feeling you get when you see them calling is something you shouldn’t ignore.

It’s a sign that you really like someone.

“If you let everyone else’s messages sit in your inbox unanswered for hours—sometimes even days—but you answer theirs within minutes of receiving it, then you like them.

“If what they have to say is more important than anyone else, then they mean something more to you,” observes Annabel Rodgers.

6) Your body is on fire for them and their kisses rock your world

Another big sign that you like someone is that their kisses rock your world and you physically desire them.

There are definitely types of romance that are more non-physical in nature, and asexual people still fall in love.

But as a general rule of thumb, somebody you like is going to trigger all sorts of positive physical responses in you.

You’ll start burning up when they’re around.

Putting your arm around them will feel like the sweetest thing in the world, and kissing them will feel much better than kissing someone you don’t have feelings for.

If you go as far as sex then it’s also likely to be out of this world, although that can also be hit and miss.

Sometimes you have feelings for someone but the sexual chemistry is still off. This is an entirely different issue…

But the basic point is that you’re going to feel a surge of energy and attraction around someone you’re really interested in.

As Marion Elvina notes:

“Pay attention to where you feel your emotions physically in your body as well. Your body gives you tons of messages about situations and people, it’s just a question of listening to them.

“Do you feel shivers when they touch you?

“Do you have goosebumps when they’re around you?

“Do you feel butterflies in your stomach?”

7) You bare your soul to them

When you like someone, you trust someone.

Even sometimes against your better judgment, you will be tempted to bare your soul to them and open up to them about who you are.

You will tell them about your childhood, your struggles, your triumphs and the twists and turns that made you who you are today.

You will want to include everything, even the grimy details.

That’s because falling in love isn’t the same as having a nice chat or thinking someone is hot.

It’s wanting to truly see them for who they are and wanting them to see and recognize you for who you are.

It’s the formation of a bond that goes beyond the shallow labels and roles we play in our daily materialist lives.

Love is visceral, real and – in those beautiful few and rare cases – also lasting.

We want to tell all about ourselves and what shaped us, and we want to hear all about it from the other person as well.

Whereas with someone else it might feel more like a chore telling about this or listening, when you like someone it feels like a privilege to get deep.

8) You want to make them part of your life in every way possible

When you like someone, you also wish to see them around and make them included as much as possible in your life.

Even if distance or career is a major roadblock, you’ll spend day and night thinking of solutions.

There’s a reason that seriously liking someone makes people do crazy things.

That’s because it’s rare and powerful.

It makes people pack up and move across a country.

It makes people move into new cultures, take new jobs or shift their entire perspectives on life.

Love is a revolution.

And liking someone is where love starts.

You want to think of many ways to join up your lives and find correlations in what you do, where you go and your plans for the future.

So if you’re in this introductory stage of romance then you will be enthusiastic about joining your life with theirs in whatever way possible.

9) You feel anxious and on edge around them

When you like someone it can be a heady experience.

You may feel anxious and on edge around them.

That’s because they’ve entered a whole new level of importance to you.

Their thoughts, reactions and feelings towards you take on a heightened importance and you may even begin to reorient your life around how things are going with them.

It’s not good to give someone else this level of influence and control over your wellbeing, but it certainly happens.

If you’re blushing around this person and they’re making your skin crawl it can actually be a very good thing.

As Sira explains:

“According to research, there is a link between feelings of anxiety and attraction. That’s why most of us tend to get nervous, blush, or even sweat when we see someone we like.

“In particular, one of the most common signs of nervousness is blushing.

“Physiologically, it occurs when an emotional trigger causes your glands to release adrenaline in your body.

“Adrenaline’s effect on your nervous system causes the capillaries that carry blood to your skin to widen.

“Since blood is then brought closer to the surface of the skin, it causes you to blush. So, it’s something you can’t control.”

10) You lose interest in all the other people you used to be into

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Another sign that you like a new person is that others you used to be interested in lose their shine.

The fantasies and romantic fixations of the past may even seem silly in comparison.

Your new connection means a lot more to you and it makes other people you were interested fade in importance.

They begin to inhabit far less of your mind and energy as you focus on the new person.

If you really like someone it takes up a lot of real estate in your head.

You just don’t have the time or interest anymore in people who used to occupy your fantasy life and romantic interest.

As Claire Hannum puts it:

“Hmm, what was it that made your unrequited love for that dude Brad at the office so enticing for all those years?”

11) Your body language responds positively to them

Body language can say a lot more than any dating guide ever will.

That’s because when we’re interested in someone, our body begins to respond in intuitive and proactive ways to them.

We orient our feet towards them, play with our hair, lick our lips and maintain eye contact, just as a few basic examples…

There are also more subtle aspects relating to tone of voice and how we speak to them that begin to shift.

When we like someone, it can happen before we even realize it.

But a social scientist there observing our date or interaction would be able to easily tell if we have a potential real romantic interest in the other person or not.

If you are unsure whether you like someone, sometimes it’s because you simply don’t have that big of a connection.

But other times it’s because your body language and instinctive reaction is happening before you even are consciously registering it.

Like Ashley Brown writes:

“Body positioning is another indicator that someone likes you.

“People tend to lean toward another person they like and distance themselves from those they dislike. Inward leaning increases as a tighter bond is formed.”

12) The psychological connection blows your mind (and body)

A big part of liking someone is how you respond to their mind.

Something about them or the way they think turns you on, both intellectually and even sometimes physically (hello out there, sapiosexuals…)

The psychological connection is something you’re going to notice.

Because it will stand out from the usual type of mind meld you have with others.

The connection will be undeniable.

And it will differ from friendship in that it not only interests or engages you, but that you also find this person physically attractive and find their ideas exciting in a way that surpasses the merely intellectual.

That’s a special thing to find and something that any of us is blessed to discover.

13) You get a short visit from the little green monster

Jealousy can be a sign of codependency and all sorts of other nasty things.

But a little bit of jealousy never killed anybody.

If the green monster comes knocking at your door then it is often a sign that you have romantic feelings for the person on your mind.

Let’s put it this way, think of the guy or girl you’re wondering about liking.

How would you feel if I told you right now that they have reconnected with an old flame and are now seriously dating someone else?

Would you more or less shrug and say, “well good luck to them!”

Or would you get a pit in your stomach and kind of feel like someone just punched you?

This tells you a lot about whether you like this person or not.

Maybe I’m just traditional, but in my opinion, a lack of any jealousy about somebody usually means you don’t like them romantically that much.

“A little bit of jealousy is natural. Jealousy becomes dangerous, however, when you start obsessing over what your partner’s doing, so much so that you do stuff like look through their phone without them knowing.

“That is toxic behavior and it might signal you’re not in a healthy relationship,” explains Jasmine Gomez.

14) You feel refreshed, engaged and amazed around them

When you like someone then they refresh your energy and make you feel revitalized.

Even when you’re in a bad mood, they accept you and don’t make you feel guilty about it.

The way you feel around them continues to amaze you.

And when you spend time apart and tell yourself it’s no big deal…

You quickly realize that it is a big deal!

You feel lost without them and realize that what they bring to the table is far more than just a charming smile or a beautiful face.

They have something intangible which you can’t find elsewhere.

15) You trust your feelings about them

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Another one of the signs that you really like someone is that you trust your intuition.

If you’re very unsure if you really care about someone, it’s usually because something’s not right.

As I said earlier, there are exceptions, but the power of your gut instinct is something you should care about and pay attention to.

When you like someone, you usually have a real feeling about it.

You may not be sure why, but something deep inside tells you that this person is special for you.

And the feeling sticks around…

As Genefe Navilon explains, “if you don’t trust yourself and your feelings, you need to spend some time hanging out with them.”

16) You never get bored of them

Most people have a shelf life with how much we like to be around them.

An hour or two? Awesome.

A week or two? I’m going to have to get back to you on that, pal.

One thing about someone you have feelings for is that time around them never gets old.

I’m not saying you’ll never disagree or rub each other the wrong way. That happens even in happy marriages at times.

What I am saying is that you will find their presence and company genuinely fulfilling and desirable.

You will enjoy being around them on an ongoing basis and seek to maximize your time with them.

There just isn’t really a saturation point after which you want to say bye.

You just keep wanting them to be around.

17) You always see their best side

The French writer Stendahl called the process of falling in love “crystallization.”

Liking someone and being in a state of limerence makes us start to see everything about them in a golden halo.

Even their negative and upsetting qualities take on the shine of rarity and value.

When you like someone you always see their best side.

Even their behavior that comes across rude, selfish or ham-handed can look adorable to you.

The downside here is that you can end up snookered into something toxic or manipulative.

The upside is that seeing the best side of someone – and the other hopefully seeing the best side of you – is a happy and energizing time.

As Petter puts it:

“So whilst you might be inclined to be critical of someone else doing or saying something, if your partner does or says them, you might love them for it, because in your eyes, they can do no wrong.”

Fixing the most important relationship of all

As I mentioned earlier, many of us depend on relationships to make us happy.

We build up expectations and ideas of what love will be.

We imagine how it will save and complete us.

I did for years: I still do some times.

But the truth is that love progresses in accordance with how our relationship with ourselves progresses.

We need to build up the starting foundation of all with ourselves.

We need to find true love and intimacy by starting inside instead of outside.

The bottom line

We’ve covered the signs you like someone, but if you want to get a completely personalized explanation of this situation and where it’ll lead you in the future, I recommend speaking to the folks over at Psychic Source

I mentioned them earlier on; I was blown away by how professional yet reassuring they were. 

Not only can they give you more direction on what to do with this person, but they can advise you on what’s in store for your future. 

Whether you prefer to have your reading over a call or chat, these advisors are the real deal. 

Click here to get your own love reading

Paul Brian

Paul R. Brian is a freelance journalist and writer. His book Cultworld was published last year. Follow him on Twitter @paulrbrian and visit his website at www.paulrbrian.com

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