17 ways to get your ex girlfriend back (even if she’s moved on)

Now here’s the hard part: your ex-girlfriend is done with you. It’s all history now for her part.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. And you don’t want to.

There are ways for you to get your ex-girlfriend and win her heart back (or at least restore some level of trust) even if she has already moved on.

You better brace yourself since they involve time, effort and sincerity from you.

Let’s jump in!

1) Remember why you broke up

There are many reasons why a relationship didn’t work out. And this time you have to look into the relationship you had with your ex-girlfriend.

It doesn’t mean that the relationship was a total failure, but maybe it was not yet meant to be.

The first step to winning her back is to figure out the real cause of why she left you.

And if you can find out why things went wrong and why you did what you did or your ex did what she did, it’ll be easier to reconcile. At least in your mind, which will help you move on even if she is not willing to do so.

Do some digging and bring to light why you parted ways, it might help you assess whether you really want her back or not.

Learn from your mistakes and wrong decisions and do things differently.

2) Ask yourself if you really want her back

I mean… she has already moved on. So why do you want her back?

You have to make sure that it is really what you want, and not because you’re just bored and feeling lonely or it is more convenient than to meet someone new.

Don’t make any decision out of half-assed feelings.

Are your feelings for her strong enough to really want her back?

Do you still feel connected with her?

Do you still want to pursue those plans you’ve made with her when you were still together?

If your answers to these questions are a big YES, then I guess you really want her back.

You love someone and you want them back, period. If your heart is truly in it, then it’s not hard to do at all.

3) Apologize

Start by letting her know what you did wrong.

Don’t beat around the bush and just explain to her what you did wrong and how you want to make things right.

Of course, this is not a prescription for getting back together immediately, but it’s a start to show her that there’s something very important you want to fix.  If there are other things that include how you treat her, then tell them too.

And believe it or not, your ex might be willing to listen if she sees that you have changed for the better because of your mistakes before in the relationship.

And of course, there’s more – apologize.

Many people think that apologizing never works. But a simple, friendly, and sincere apology will help bring back the former love and restore the trust she had for you when you were together.

Remember, it is important to be respectful even if she doesn’t say anything in return or even if there’s no perfect time to express your regret on how things went down.

And by apologizing, you have to do it in person and do it sincerely. If you do that, she will know how sorry you are and perhaps open herself to give you another chance.

Just remember that time isn’t on your side if you want things to go back to the way they used to be. You better act now!

Learn to apologize sincerely, with this, you are stepping further to show that you want her back and would like a second chance with her.

4) Give her space and be patient

Your ex is still going through a lot of emotions in her head and heart, probably about what happened between the two of you.

In such a situation, everything might seem so confusing for her that she might just need some time alone to figure out what she’s going to do next, especially with the big part that you played in it all.

Just let her be, and stop asking for an answer if you don’t feel it’s the right time for her to respond.

Keep in mind not to contact her except when necessary.

Give her some time and space to figure things out without being worried or confused about what she should do next.

Okay, I know that it’s not easy to actually give her space and leave.

However, I know a way to handle this situation and let her be on herself.

As a matter of fact, after going through difficulties in my own love life, I reached out to professional coaches at Relationship Hero.

I didn’t expect anything like this but they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship, including practical advice on how to give my partner some space and build boundaries.

As a result, our communication style improved and I managed to save the relationship.

So, if you’re also looking for practical ways to get your ex back, maybe this is something you should try.

Click here to get started.

5) Show your worth

It’s hard for someone to accept you back if you haven’t shown her that you have changed.

It’s time for you to show her the best version of yourself. If you want to get back together with your ex-girlfriend, then you must be willing to do what it takes.

Try changing your habits and behaviors for a bit and show her that she’s wrong about not believing in you. Every girl wants a guy who can prove his worth to her, that’s why you need to change and show her how much you’ve improved.

You must change the mindset that you can no longer live without her because that kind of mentality isn’t going to get a second chance in your relationship. So if she’s not ready yet, don’t force anything at all.

You must be patient while also showing her (and yourself) that there is a better version of yourself waiting for her if she decides to take a leap of faith once again.

Find a way to make her see that she’s wrong about how she sees you and it’ll be easier for her to accept you back.

Not only that, every positive change you achieve will benefit you more that anyone else. So think of this as a “jumping from a high-cloud” moment to your best self.

The thing is she has left for good reason and you need to convince her there’s still hope for what had once been a fantastic relationship.

You can do this!

6) Change your looks

Whoever said people do not fall in love with the way they look is just lying to you. Look good and maybe, just maybe, change can do some magic.

Surprise your ex-girlfriend (and maybe the people around you) with

– a new haircut

– a change of hairstyle

– a new get-up

– a new pair of contacts instead of glasses

– a new tattoo

– a new style of dressing up

With this “new” image you have, your ex-girlfriend will definitely notice it and appreciate your effort. And you’ll see the results too, because with a new image, comes a new transformation in self-confidence and you’ll be more attractive to the opposite sex.

The key is to try adjusting your looks and see how it turns out.

It’s worth a shot, right?

7) Wait for the right time and tell her exactly what you want

The best way to make things go back to how they used to be is for both of you to communicate with each other in a clear and direct way about what happened after the breakup.

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You should also decide when it’s the right time to tell her, exactly how she can read something into it when she’s ready. If you agree on this, do it when all the confusion has cleared up in your heart and mind.

So that the chances of her taking you back are greater, make sure to tell her how much you miss her, what you did wrong at the start of your relationship and how happy she made you.

We’re not through yet. Don’t beat around the bush, be direct with her – like I have mentioned earlier. Express your desire for a second chance with her.

Just make sure that these words are sincere because sincerity matters a lot if you want to win her over.

8) Embrace your emotions

Let me be totally honest with you.

Maybe this is where most men fail in getting back with their ex-girlfriend. Everyone is different and sometimes, men tend to approach their breakup differently than women do.

What I mean here is that when it comes to relationships, women tend to be more emotional while men try to suppress or ignore their emotions. It’s normal to feel like you’re a failure after the breakup, but expressing it is the next step.

The only thing men have to be careful about is that you shouldn’t make her feel guilty or sorry for what she did to you or make her think that she’s responsible for your pain.

She shouldn’t see you as a victim with this approach. Instead, show her how much you’ve grown from this experience and show her that the person you are now will not allow anyone to hurt her again.

Don’t hesitate to be honest with yourself and feel those emotions you’ve been trying to bury.

9) Let her miss you

Now that you have expressed your desire to get back with her, let her see your efforts to make her miss you. You have to do something that will make her remember why she fell in love with you in the first place.

Be patient and let time take its course. Be persistent but not too persistent that it becomes desperate.

Make sure whatever you do is genuine and that it has nothing to do with pity or desperation.

Remember, your “sincerity” will be what will help win her over eventually!

So stay true, and try to show how much she means to you by doing something nice for her without expecting anything in return.

10) Reassure her

If you really want to get back with your ex-girlfriend, try making her feel safe with you again.

It’s not right to just put the pressure on her shoulders alone and expect things to get better.

Surely, she has every right not to trust you anymore – because of what happened before. To assure this doesn’t happen again, make sure you are not pressuring her into anything and that you are on the same page as her.

She is just as nervous as you are, so let her be. Just do what you can and don’t do what you think you can’t. For example, if she’s not ready to restart your relationship yet, leave it at that and give her time to think things through.

But if she gives you a green light or a clear signal, go ahead and let her know that you’re there for her.

If things seem to be heading in the right direction then maybe you two will get back together!

Give this time a chance to see each other again and see if you’ll be able to rekindle the love with trust and reassurance.

11) Be her friend

From her lover to an ex, then to a friend.

It’s a pretty steep decline but somehow it does make sense when you really let yourself take the time to think about it. Because at the end of the day, every woman wants to be loved as well as respected and appreciated.

Show her that you’re willing to put her feelings first before yours. Make that phone call and invite her out to a movie or a nice dinner – if you know she has been going through something recently, offer some comfort by being there for her in the way she needs it.

Be mature enough if things don’t work out between you two again, just like how they did before.

Through this, you can make her remember, despite the mistakes you did in the past, that you were a great and supportive boyfriend. So be her friend first and let that as a starting point to rebuild the trust in your relationship.

12) Create better communication

Maybe this is already something you’re doing already and it just needs to be perfected.

If you want to win her back, then focusing on communicating with her on a more daily basis would be the best thing you can do to make things go back on track once again.

This step involves having constant conversations, being truthful and clear about what really happened and understanding that you both have feelings when it comes to making things work again.

A lot of men fail on this part because they try to move too fast after the breakup but speed is not important when it comes to getting back together with someone.

Try to be as involved in her day, but not intrusive, so that she won’t feel pressured by you.

Make sure that the conversation is spicy and a push-and-pull so that it will keep her interested in your life and make her think twice about not being with you.

You must show her how much you care about her and what she means to you.

Don’t be afraid to be yourself as this is the main key in getting back together with someone. If she really likes this about you, chances are high that she’ll be wanting to get back together.

13) Let go of resentment

Countless relationships have been destroyed by the unnecessary feelings of resentment.

As I’ve said before, if you want your relationship to blossom, you need to let go of all the pains she caused you in the past.

If you harbor grudges and hold on to the anger you feel towards her then that’s really a big mistake on your part because this will only make things heavier between the two of you.

As much as it hurts to let go, think about how much she means to you and how much this matters for both of your future. You owe it to yourself and most especially, you owe it to her.

Time is not on your side here! Having resentment for someone who has once been very dear to your life will only eat you up inside. Trust me on this.

You must let go of it – no matter what.

You have to remember that this is a part of letting go of a failed relationship. So you must make amends with the decision you’ve made, forgive yourself and move on with your life by setting free of all the negative feelings towards her.

14) Make her feel special

If you want to get back together with your ex-girlfriend again, it all boils down to making her feel special.

This is something you should be doing already but if you’re not, then it’s never too late to start.

You can make her immediately see how much she means to you by remembering all the little things she likes and even going a step further by adding some of these into your relationship.

For example, if she likes you to text her while she’s in the office, then send her a text message every now and then. If she likes you to surprise her with flowers, then make sure you do it regularly.

If she likes you to cook for her, then make sure you do it on a regular basis.

You get the point – if you really want to get back with your ex-girlfriend, show her that you’re the man she was looking for in the first place and do whatever she likes.

Don’t only use it as a tactic to get back together with her but use it as a way to make your relationship stronger together.

15) Don’t be clingy!

If she tries to get back together with you and seems really excited about it, then don’t ruin it by being too clingy.

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It’s always advisable that you don’t force her into anything because as soon as she starts feeling suffocated or trapped by your presence alone, then chances are high that she’ll be thinking twice about getting with you again.

The best way for you to get her back is by showing her that you’re a cool and easy going kind of person.

After all, this is the type of man she’s always been looking for.

Be respectful, don’t stereotype her into the stereotypical girl who would get easily attached to a man and be clingy after giving the relationship a second chance.

This is something that will just make things harder between the two of you in the long run.

Like I said before, she wants someone who can support her and bring out the best in both of your relationships as well as make things work even when they have gone wrong at one stage.

16) Learn relationship skills

If you want to get back together with your ex-girlfriend, then it’s always good to learn a few relationship skills.

This is not something that you can learn overnight and you must be willing to dedicate some time and effort to it.

You knew how to treat her before, but now’s the time for things to change so that she feels more special and valued. Just like what I’ve mentioned in the previous step, instead of being clingy, try being more involved in her life.

Communicate with her regularly and share what’s going on with you and your day as well just make sure you don’t come off as needy or pushy.

Try to take an interest in the things she is interested in to show her that you’re a man who is willing to do anything for her. Be there when she needs you and be reliable and trustworthy.

As soon as you can figure out how to treat her and make her understand that she’s the only one for you, then the chances of getting back together with your ex-girlfriend are really high.

17) Know when to move on

From the very beginning, your ex-girlfriend has already moved on from you.

Now when the time comes and you’ve done all of the parts that you could and still, you’re not getting the results you wanted, then it’s time to move on.

You have to be able to know when is the right time to make this decision. It’s not always right to give everything your ex-girlfriend has asked of you knowing you have a lot of feelings for her just because you can’t let her go yet.

It’s a process of letting go and if she doesn’t want this kind of relationship, she’ll tell you so. There’s no point in dragging things out since that will just make both of you miserable!

Don’t push yourself into something that makes both of those people end up being hurt in the end.

I know it’s not easy for a man in this situation because you have been really attached and want to save this relationship at all costs.

What you don’t realize is that she has moved on and may just not be ready for a relationship with you anymore. 

Listen, you’ve changed for the good and I believe you are heading to the better version of you.

If your ex-girlfriend is still blind of all your time and genuine efforts to win her back, then it’s time to move on.

Final thoughts

I hope that you found this article helpful and that it will ease your mind and you will be able to know how to get back together with your ex-girlfriend.

As long as you do all the above steps, then there’s absolutely no reason for you not to get her back.

But while the tips in this article should help you get your ex-girlfriend back, there’s only so much you can do alone.

If you genuinely want your ex girlfriend back, you need the help of a professional.

Brad Browning, an expert at helping couples move past their issues and reconnect on a genuine level made an excellent free video in which he reveals his tried and tested methods.

So if you want a shot at getting your ex girlfriend back, then you need to watch relationship expert Brad Browning’s free video right now.

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Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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