26 useful ways to get over the guilt of cheating

If you’ve ever felt guilty after cheating on your partner, you’re not alone.

Whether you’re feeling guilty because you’re not sure if your partner will catch on, or if it’s because you’re ashamed of yourself for hurting them, the important thing is that it’s something that affects a lot of people.

I’ve compiled 26 ways to get over the guilt of cheating (plus, they’ll make you feel better about what you’ve done).

1) Stop comparing yourself to somebody else who cheated.

Comparing yourself to someone else who cheats will not make your situation feel any better. They cheated, and the only reason that it made them feel better is because they are someone different from you. Their situation is theirs and theirs alone.

Instead of comparing yourself to the other person, you should compare the situation to what you would do if you were in the same position. And then you’ll be able to see that it was not as bad as it had felt.

2) Start being honest with your partner and don’t hide things from them.

If your partner is unaware of everything that’s going on, this may be very hurtful for them and make them feel unsafe at times, which is something else that will make you feel guilty.

You should be honest with your partner about everything that’s going on, including the fact that you’re involved in something outside of your relationship.

By being honest with them, it will give them the option to make the decision for themselves if they don’t want to continue in a relationship where cheating is involved. They have a better chance of having a relationship based on honesty and trust.

3) Recognize that what you’ve done is not the end of the world and it’s not the end of your relationship.

The hardest thing to do when you’re feeling guilty because of cheating is to realize this; but it’s true: A part of you might feel like everything is over and that your relationship was destroyed by what you’ve done.

But remember this: It doesn’t necessarily mean that it has to be.

You have to think about what your relationship is all about, and if you value it enough, you need to work on it.

However, if you’ve done too many things wrong in the past, then it’s best to move on. That’s why it’s hard to determine what’s the right thing to do. 

Something that could help during such a complicated situation in your love life might be speaking to a professional relationship coach.

Now you might be thinking that you can’t trust all the coaches out there and you’re right.

But from my experience, relationship coaches from Relationship Hero are professionals who help people navigate complex and difficult love situations, like being unable to carefully reflect on things that happened in your relationship.

Why do I recommend them?

Well, after going through difficulties in my own love life, I reached out to them for help. I can’t tell you how much their unique insights helped me to understand the dynamics of my relationship.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice specific to your situation.

Click here to check them out.

4) Realize that your partner will eventually find out – even if they don’t know that they already did.

This is self-explanatory: At some point in the future (or even now), they’ll find out that something was going on behind their back. Maybe it was the security system, or maybe one of your friends saw you doing something on your phone.

Regardless of how they found out, you need to recognize that this will happen, at some point in the future. This can only happen if you’re committed to staying with someone who cheats on them, which is an important thing to keep in mind.

5) Remember that nobody’s perfect – even if they claim not to be.

Sure, nobody’s perfect and none of us are perfect either (i.e. we all make mistakes in the course of our lives). But the idea of perfection is a completely unrealistic idea that has been created by the media and society in general.

The solution to this is to remember that nobody’s perfect. A lot of people claim not to be, but that doesn’t mean it’s true; because if it were true, then no one would be having any problems and things would all just work out for them.

6) Don’t let what you’ve done affect the rest of your life or your relationships.

This is a really important thing to keep in mind, if you’re thinking about cheating again. You can’t keep doing it every time you feel that temptation coming up on you; otherwise, you’ll eventually do it one way or another and then regret it later on in life.

The most important thing is to stop yourself from doing anything wrong. Reach out to your friends and family and engage in healthy activities that are beneficial to you, as well as the rest of the people around you.

If you find yourself getting involved in things that make you feel guilty, let them know about it. You don’t want to keep doing things that make yourself feel bad about your decisions.

7) Confront your partner with the fact that something’s going on outside of their knowledge.

This is a really big step to take, but it’s important if you want to establish a healthy relationship with your partner. It even makes it so that they’re more likely to trust you and open up in the long run.

Confronting them can be hard because of the fear of getting caught, or if you think that they’ll get angry about what you’ve done. This is why you should think about how exactly you should go about it.

You can start out by bringing up the subject in a casual conversation, or even in a neutral way where you’re not accusing them of anything. This kind of topic is good because it allows them to ask their questions, and you can answer their questions as well.

This way, they’ll be more likely to open up with the truth and have an actual open conversation that can help both of you with your relationship problems.

8) Don’t let what you’ve done ruin your life.

A lot of people who go through situations like this will let what they’ve done ruin their lives in the long run. This is a dangerous prospect because it can have a negative impact on everything that’s going on around them, including their relationships and their health.

It’s important to realize that even if you’ve done something wrong, it can be corrected in the future once you’ve made your mind up to do so. But if you keep yourself in a place where you’re constantly thinking about what you did, it can start affecting your life in a negative way.

9) Let go of guilt and remorse and just concentrate on moving forward.

When you feel guilty about something, the most important thing to do is to let go of that guilt and the remorse that comes with it. It will be a lot easier to move on if you’re not feeling guilty and remorseful about what you’ve done, because there’s nothing to feel guilty about.

You need to realize that what happened is done and there’s nothing you can do about it now. It’s better to concentrate on the future and find healthier ways of dealing with your own actions going forward.

10) Allow yourself time to think about the options available for you, even if it feels like a no-win situation.

This is a point a lot of people don’t realize until it’s too late: Sometimes, someone might make the wrong decision to do something they shouldn’t have done. But just because they did it, that doesn’t mean they can’t do something about it.

There are still options available – even if you think that there aren’t. All you have to do is realize that things can be corrected and sometimes, the solution can be found in places where you wouldn’t expect it.

11) Realize that it’s not the end of the world.

This can be hard to understand, but everything is going to be okay in the end. The important thing is to realize that everything is going to be okay and you should just focus on moving forward as best as you can.

12) Focus on what you need to focus on in order to move forward and work on that, instead of focusing on what you’ve done wrong or what happened in the past.

This is another thing a lot of people don’t realize until it’s too late: You need to focus on what you can do right now. If you keep dwelling on the things that have happened, things are going to start feeling worse in the long run.

You can’t dwell on it forever and you can’t keep looking back at the things that have happened. What’s happened is done and there’s nothing you can do about it now, so it’s better to focus on what you should be focusing on – learning from your mistakes so that you don’t make the same mistake in the future.

13) Remember that the past doesn’t define who you are or who you’re going to be.

This is a really important truth to realize: The past doesn’t define who you are or who you’re going to be, so don’t let it. It’s important to realize that there are other things that you can do besides dwell on what happened in the past.

14) Remain calm and relax, and try to focus on something else.

Anything that makes you feel nervous will make it harder for you to deal with the situation at hand. When you feel nervous or anxious, it’s going to be harder for you to think clearly and make the right decisions as well.

When dealing with something like this, try to remain calm and relaxed as much as possible. Doing this will make it easier for you to think clearly, because you’ll be in a state where you won’t be too nervous and anxious when thinking of what to do.

15) Remember that a lot of people have done worse things than you have ever done and they still live with themselves afterwards.

Everyone makes mistakes and everyone commits crimes, but that doesn’t mean that you should feel guilty about them forever. All of these people have been through similar things and they’ve been able to see that everything is going to be okay in the long run.

If these people can get through what they did and move past it, so can you. You just need to realize that even if you’ve done something wrong in the past, it’s possible to move forward as long as you’re willing to take the right steps going forward.

16) Remember that every day is a chance to start over and do better than how you did yesterday.

It’s a good idea to remember that every day is a chance for you to do something better than how you did it the day before.

If you realize that every day is a chance for you to start over and improve, you’ll be less likely to dwell on the past and what happened because you’ll have more important things to think about.

17) Don’t think too hard and don’t overthink things so much that they become worse than they already are.

It’s easy to think about situations too much, especially when you feel bad for what you’ve done. But your thoughts are only going to get worse if you keep thinking about things too much. You’ll have a harder time focusing on what’s going on and can start making the situation worse.

18) Remember that the person who did the crime is still there and will have to deal with everything that comes from it, just like when anyone else commits a crime and has to deal with it in another way.

When you commit a crime and have to deal with the consequences, that doesn’t mean it’s going to change who you are or what kind of person you are. You’re still going to be the same person that you’ve always been before.

You just have to realize that the wrong action has been committed and we might have to pay for it later – just like any other wrongdoing we might commit in our lives.

19) Realize that it’s not something you have to do alone.

You might feel like something like this is your responsibility alone and you’re the only person who is responsible for it. It’s also possible that other people might make you feel this way, but it’s important to realize that you don’t have to put everything on yourself.

There are other people around who can help with any situation, just like they would if anyone else needed help with anything similar.

20) Realize that there are people who will be willing to help you deal with the situation you’re in.

If anyone finds out about what you did and what happened, it’s possible that they’ll be willing to help you deal with the situation in whatever way they can. The important thing is to ask for their help and don’t be afraid of asking for it.

21) Think of what you can do now to make yourself feel better and focus on that and not what’s already happened.

It’s important to think about what you can do now to make yourself feel better and see the best in everything going forward, instead of dwelling on the past so much.

If you get into a situation like this, it’s important for you to realize that there are other ways for you to deal with this other than using drugs or alcohol.

22) Realize that making mistakes doesn’t mean that you can’t learn from them and become a better person.

If something bad happened to you, it’s important to realize that you can use this as a learning experience so that you don’t make the same mistakes in the future.

Making mistakes doesn’t mean that you can’t learn from them and become a better person as long as you put in the effort to try and make yourself better overall.

23) Remember that there are people who care about you and want to help you, no matter what.

It’s important to remember that there are people who care about you and want to help you, no matter what.

The important thing is to realize that the people who care about you don’t necessarily know the kind of things that have happened and they might not know what’s going on with everything either.

But that doesn’t mean that these people won’t want to help you and will only ignore you when they couldn’t do anything. The important thing is to realize that those who care about you want the best for you and will try to help, no matter what.

24) Realize that the situation can get better in time and it doesn’t have to stay this way forever.

It’s important not to let yourself get so sad, depressed, or angry with yourself as far as dealing with the situation goes.

If you can realize that the situation can get better in time and that you don’t need to stay the same person after all of this, then it’ll be easier for you to move on.

25) Don’t give up on yourself so quickly and don’t lose hope because things have happened in the past like this.

When something like this happens, it’s important to realize that you shouldn’t give up on yourself so quickly and throwing your hands up in the air is never a good thing. It’s important not to lose hope and realize that there are other people out there who are willing to help.

26) Remember that you can still change and influence the world in a positive way.

You might feel like this situation has changed you completely, but it doesn’t have to change anything about yourself at all. You’re still the same person you’ve always been, even if something like this happened to you in the past.

There’s no reason why you can’t still be someone who can help influence the world in a positive way – just because something like this happened doesn’t mean that you can’t still make a difference.

Winning your partner’s affections again

If you’re feeling guilty for cheating and you still want to be with your partner again, you need to accept the situation and do something about it.

You need to win your partner’s affections back.

Of course, this isn’t going to be an easy thing to do. You’re going to have to win them back over by showing them that you’re still a good person and you can be trusted again.

You need to accept what happened and realize that it was your fault, not anyone else’s. You also need to accept the fact that there are other people out there who might care about you and who will forgive your actions.

Once you realize this, it’ll be easier for you to move on from this situation – instead of being stuck in anger or depression over what happened.

Here are the steps that you need to take to win your partner’s affections back:

Step 1: Accept what happened.

There’s no reason to lie to yourself and pretend like something like this didn’t happen if it did. You have to accept it and be honest with yourself about everything that happened.

You have to realize that this is your fault and that you were in the wrong here. You have to realize that nothing excuses what you did and there isn’t anything else that could’ve been done or a different choice you could’ve made for things not to end up like they did.

Step 2: Realize that someone else was involved.

You can’t let yourself get so caught up in your emotions and what happened that you completely lose sight of the fact that there were two people involved in this situation. You need to realize that someone else was involved and this is something that you did with them.

You didn’t do this by yourself, or it would be a lot easier for you to let go of what happened and moving on from it.

Step 3: Change who you are as a person for the better.

Once you realize how badly you’ve screwed up, it’s something that will make you want to change who you are as a person, no matter what. You have nothing to be ashamed of and there’s no reason why this has to define the rest of your life the way it has been.

You need to realize that you’re a good person with a lot of good things going for you and there is no reason why you can’t make new choices to help yourself change the way your life goes.

Step 4: Try to be better.

If you want to regain your partner’s affections and win them back, the only thing that’s stopping you from doing so is yourself.

The only thing stopping you from changing how you act is the way that you act and how much you’ve changed in the past. You will have nothing but more opportunities for changes if it’s something that really bothers you about yourself – don’t waste them by not being willing to change at this point.

Step 5: Show your partner that they can trust you again.

The most important thing at this point is to show your partner that they can trust you again.

This is by far the most important thing that you can do, no matter what. You need to be honest with yourself and understand that if this ever happened again, then it would be over for a second time.

Step 6: Work on trusting yourself again.

You will also want to start working on trusting yourself again as well and understand how much of a good person you really are deep down inside.

If you have someone who trusts you and loves you and is willing to go through this process with you, then there’s no reason why it shouldn’t be easier for you to move on from what happened than it would be otherwise.

Remember that people care about you and there are a lot of nice things that can happen for yourself if you’re willing to work on yourself the right way.

You will start moving past this experience if you want it to happen, no matter what kind of obstacles are in the way. You need to realize that your situation is going to take some time to improve in the long run and that it probably isn’t going to get better overnight, or even in months or years.

You need to be patient and understand that it will take time and you’ll have to work on yourself a lot. Don’t get discouraged because it can take years before you truly see the kind of changes that you want to make in your life.

If your partner is going to stick around with you, then they’re going to have to accept all of these changes as well. They won’t be able to move on from this situation if they’re not willing to change for themselves as well.

Conclusion

If you’re feeling guilty for cheating, there are things that you need to do to move past this situation.

You don’t want to let yourself be stuck in negative emotions and if you want your partner to forgive you, then you shouldn’t let yourself make the same mistakes again. You will be able to move on from this experience if you act on what we’ve told you here.

You have nothing but time and the ability to learn from the mistakes that you made. It can take years before people truly see the changes that they need to make and this will probably be one of those tough things that it takes a long time for anyone to really get used to.

You should always try to be better and accept that this is something that you did. If you’re willing to do these things, then there’s no reason why anyone else should have a hard time forgiving you. You are still a good person and everyone gets their moment of weakness where they do something that they wish they hadn’t done.

If this is something that has happened for the first time and it’s something that only happened one time, then there isn’t any reason why your partner can’t be able to forgive you for it.

If they truly love you and care about you, then they will be more willing to give you a second chance than anyone else. It’s all going to depend on how much of a good person you understand yourself to be.

Want more help? Check out our related articles below.

Picture of Pearl Nash

Pearl Nash

Pearl Nash has years of experience writing relationship articles for single females looking for love. After being single for years with no hope of meeting Mr. Right, she finally managed to get married to the love of her life. Now that she’s settled down and happier than she’s ever been in her life, she's passionate about sharing all the wisdom she's learned over the journey. Pearl is also an accredited astrologer and publishes Hack Spirit's daily horoscope.

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