How do I align my inner and outer worlds?

First of all congratulations!

Just by asking the question “How do I align my inner and outer worlds?” you have already made great leaps and bounds down your spiritual path.

Acknowledging the tension that exists between the inner and outer self shows real spiritual growth in itself.


Regardless of inner battles, we get to choose how we present ourselves to the rest of the world. And most of us are guilty of presenting an outer self that hides some of what is on the inside.

So the conflict is inevitable from time to time.

Whether or not we share our true feelings often depends on the situation we are in and our expectations of how it will pan out. Sure you can weigh the pros and cons of inner and outer life but that doesn’t always bring balance.

But why not?

Everyone holds some kind of values at their core. When our behavior or actions conflict with our core values it can bring inner turmoil.

Learning to balance your inner and outer self is possible and does wonders for your health; physically, mentally, and spiritually.

Thankfully, there are a few tips you can use to help you strike a balance and align your inner and outer worlds.

Listen to your inner world

If you have been looking outside to find happiness, then you are not alone.

It is something we are all guilty of falling prey to. We are raised from a young age to find value in the outside world.

We are taught and shown the beauty and wonder in the world around us. We are bought gifts and bombarded by advertising for shiny trinkets that bring momentary joy. We take pleasure in food and physical experiences.

Do you treat yourself and still feel like something is missing?

Are you only striving on the surface? Experiencing an internal disconnect?

Living a busy life you can easily find yourself caught up in the 9-5 rat race. But without listening to your inner world you let the outer world take precedence and cause a huge imbalance.

This eventually presents itself in the external world. It can be as simple as being indecisive, or in the form of tiredness. From mild to major concerns, such as lingering anxiety and even depression.

Real happiness can’t be found on the outside without balancing your inner needs.

So, connect.

Ignore your inner world no longer!

Listening is the only way to figure out what it is that you actually want and what truly makes you happy.

Your individuality isn’t tied to appearance. The part of you that makes you unique is inside and there is nothing more empowering than discovering it.

So look inside and start accepting who you are at your core. Through and through!

Identify your core values

Your core values can be thought of like the foundations of a house. No matter how beautiful a house appears on the outside without a sturdy foundation; all is lost.

Your core values are fundamental in laying the basis for the decisions you make, the actions you choose, and behaviors you exhibit.

Identifying your core values is the first step in laying the foundations of inner and outer world alignment.

The good news is, with your core values identified, you can begin to think and act without conflict.

Feelings of guilt and shame can stem from crossing our core values. So it is important to really get to know yourself.

So, be honest with yourself and just listen!

To find out how you feel you can think about some simple questions.

  • What are your biggest goals?
  • Do your everyday actions reflect your desires?- Which of them do?
  • When do you feel peaceful with who you are and why?
  • What motivates or inspires you the most?
  • How do you measure success?

Now explore your answers. Identify what traits and concepts that are of the highest value to you. For instance, it might be honesty, loyalty, or friendship.

Why is this so important?

Having a clear set of core values has been proven by researchers to improve the lives of people in many ways. Here are just a few examples of what things the research shows core values help with:

  • Making big life decisions
  • The pursuit of passions and goals
  • Successful and meaningful relationships and strong social connections
  • Better self-discipline
  • Having a higher tolerance for physical pain
  • Having a more positive general outlook without self-destructive behavior

I know, it can be hard to see how your morals can possibly match the outer world.

Especially if you are faced with a challenge to your beliefs.

But there’s a set of ways how to overcome the conflict of ideas. Here they are.

List the activities that align with your values daily

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Focus on which of your values you can promote easily and regularly in your everyday actions.

Start keeping a record, you will find some of your values are much more aligned than others.

Here’s a real-life example.

If family is important to you but you don’t keep regular contact this could be a hidden source of underlying conflict for you.

Perhaps you find you spend more time than you thought home alone. To live in balance with your true values, call your parents and check in, or organize a family facetime instead of going to the bar with co-workers or spending a day at home alone.

Start basing your daily activities in your free time around the things you value the most.

You will soon find you feel much happier.

Wherever there is a gap that needs to be filled, find the solution.

If you spend a lot of nights in but value friendship, plan a gathering. The values of the inner self must be reflected in your actions.

It really is as easy as that!

Not sure? Below are some useful examples of activities that align with some typical values.

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Meditate on values

To align your inner and outer worlds requires a lot of focus. You have to concentrate on your core values. Meditation is an ideal way to do this.

Relax yourself and clear your mind with a series of deep breaths.

When you are in a meditative state you can allow each of your values to enter your thoughts.

You will find your responses are much more honest within your awareness.

Breath and sit with each thought. Let it expand and evolve. Don’t question thoughts that arise. Just experience them, notice how they feel, and let them take you on the thought trail they want to lead you on.

This will get you thinking in new ways.

You could give yourself a little mantra like the following:

“My inner and outer worlds are united. My sense of individuality is not my identity, who I am resonates to the outside. I have awareness of my self in the outer world from the center of my being. The alignment of the two keeps me anchored by my core values. My inner and outer worlds have balance.”

During meditative concentration like this, you are simply a receiver. Reserve judgment and let the ideas flow and simmer in your being.

Why not make notes after?

Change the way you think

Ridding yourself of unhealthy thought patterns and processes is a very powerful technique.

Once you control your thoughts, your inner world is quieter and streamlined.

Keep your thoughts anchored to your values. Then they can be a positive influence on your outer world actions.

Why is this beneficial?

Life is known for throwing us curveballs, when the situations you find yourself in are out of your control. But whether bad or good you can control how you experience them.

This isn’t easy at the start of aligning your inner and outer worlds. But conflict and resistance are part of the journey.

Step by step you will get the balance you are looking for.

Balance can be cultivated.

How you may ask?

Stop playing the blame game and focus on positive thought processes.

Make peace with your core values, trust that they are strong enough to guide you.

Then you can move forwards with less stress. Physical actions and experiences will become more meaningful and you can begin to live without inhibition.

Make room for a bigger change

If you find yourself with a lot of unresolved imbalance then you need to consider a bigger lifestyle shift in your outer world.

Sometimes a drastic shake-up is needed. Change careers, meet new people, get rid of toxic relationships.

Being mindful and meditating on your situation can help you to pinpoint the changes that you need to make to align yourself.

Start with the core values that you have that are being neglected the most.

Whether it’s something small like allocating yourself some well-deserved personal time or a dramatic shift like changing your job field. You have to mindfully align your life to your individual values.

Just remember, your core values may evolve as you grow as a person. It is a lifelong journey of self-discovery, not a checklist.

So check in with yourself.

Life circumstances will shape you along the way. You are an individual, the path is ultimately trial and error.

Be prepared to learn a lot about yourself

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It can be hard to see how your morals can possibly match the outer world.

Especially if you are faced with a challenge to your beliefs.

To overcome the conflict of ideas you need to allow the outside world and its trials to strengthen you.

How do you do that, you ask?

The simplest solution is to accept the challenges and resistance you experience as a lesson.

Each new challenge or obstacle you face becomes the opportunity to experiment with your actions.

Change how you interact with your external environment and those around you. See the opportunities as a chance to learn and grow.

Stay connected to your internal truths and strengthen the connections between the two worlds. Find projects that satisfy the heart and mind.

Detach yourself from ignorant behaviors that go against your core values. Put the thoughts to bed, don’t sit revisiting them and wasting your energy. That will only bring headaches and long sleepless nights.

Instead, drop the thoughts entirely and focus on the positive. Put your energy into making outer world changes.

Share your bounty

You may find you easily fall back into old habits with destructive thought patterns. You may experience a feeling of disconnection with the outside world, this can make you hesitant or fearful.

Sharing your journey helps you to keep alive what you have learned along the way.

Your experiences and processes can impact others greatly.

So share!

The universe draws people together for a reason. By sharing you could help someone else connect with their inner world unintentionally.

And that’s a bonus, right?

Not only will you find yourself back on your path, but you will help others with their journey and self-discovery.

If you want to see good in the world then sharing your truth and being generous with the things you have learned can help people find their hearts.

Parting words

The journey can be a difficult one, the external world is demanding, mentally and physically it can even be exhausting.

You may feel like you have very little time to focus on whether or not your outside life matches your inner desires.

But even the smallest steps lead to big changes. So, find the time. No matter how little.

This is a lifelong journey and not a race. The most important thing is that you are learning along the way.

As you learn to align your inner and outer worlds, you will become less imbalanced and the journey becomes easier.

With the inner and outer worlds aligned, you will find you are much happier, and at the end of the day…

Isn’t that what we all desire?

Pearl Nash

Pearl Nash

Pearl Nash has years of experience writing relationship articles for single females looking for love. After being single for years with no hope of meeting Mr. Right, she finally managed to get married to the love of her life. Now that she’s settled down and happier than she’s ever been in her life, she's passionate about sharing all the wisdom she's learned over the journey. Pearl is also an accredited astrologer and publishes Hack Spirit's daily horoscope.

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