What’s the first thing you look for in a partner? Is it good looks, a winning personality, or maybe it’s pure and simple loyalty?
That’s right! Beauty, charm, and wit will only get you so far – they’re meaningless without trust or morals.
After all, isn’t that what we want? A partner that encourages, supports, and comforts us through the ups and downs – no matter what.
And that’s exactly what you get with someone loyal.
So, if you’ve been hurt in the past, or you want to find someone as committed and trustworthy as you. Here are seven behaviors loyal people never display in a relationship.
Don’t forget to take notes!
Remembering these red flags could save you a lot of heartache in the long run.
1) Pull a Houdini when things get tough
When you’re having a rotten day, who’s the first person you call?
Chances are, you didn’t choose your flakey friend or self-centered sibling. No, it was your loyal partner – your rock.
The same reliable person who has always been there to offer a shoulder to cry on.
Simply put – you know, whatever the situation, they’ll be there for you. They won’t go MIA or vanish into thin air when the going gets tough.
Most of all, they’ll never ghost you.
Unfortunately, not everyone can say the same. And research shows that you probably know someone who has been ghosted. Either by a friend or romantic partner.
This social phenomenon isn’t new. But in the digital age, where anyone can be easily found at the click of a button, it’s difficult not to feel hurt when someone actively blocks you or suddenly cuts ties without an explanation.
However, you might be surprised to learn it’s not just the ghosted party that suffers. The person doing the ghosting also loses out.
But don’t worry. There are telltale signs to look out for.
“Soft ghosting” is just that, it starts out slow. You may barely notice pulling away at first.
Perhaps, they rarely reply to messages, seem disinterested in your life, or become distant when sharing personal details about themselves. They might put off introducing you to their social circle…
Or they regularly cancel plans at the last minute.
2) Renege or ditch plans at a moment’s notice
We all have that one person in our lives. Someone who’s always late, repeatedly bails on commitments, and is frequently unavailable when you need them most.
Let me put it this way – they’re flaky AF! And totally unreliable.
It could be a family member, friend, or coworker. But it should never be your significant other. Not if you want a healthy relationship, anyway.
Because when someone’s undependable, it betrays your trust. And it leaves you questioning their commitment to you.
Thankfully, loyal people will never stand you up or flake at a moment’s notice. Nope. They’re the ones you can always count on.
When they say they’ll be there, they mean it. Punctuality is their middle name (well, figuratively speaking).
3) Publicly trash their relationship
… or talk behind your back.
Relationships can be tough. There are good days and bad. So, the odd disagreement here and there is perfectly normal.
But how you handle that conflict says a lot about a person’s integrity.
Loyal people will never broadcast their grievances in public, subtweet about your relationship, or badmouth you to their friends and family – even if they’re really upset.
No. They respect you too much for that. Most of all, they understand that dirty laundry should be kept in the hamper.
Instead, they like to let calmer minds prevail. Talk it out – just the two of you.
By working on your issues together, you can find a solution without getting nasty or dragging others into your mess through triangulation tactics.
4) Maliciously spill the beans
Similarly, they’ll never disclose personal information or betray your confidence. In fact, loyal people are famously tight-lipped.
And they’re certainly no blabbermouth. That’s for sure.
Now hear me out – relationships are all about trust. Something that has to be earned over time. But sadly, there’s more than one way to break it.
From being faithful to keeping your secrets, well, secret, your partner should be the one person you can turn to and “trust” that they’ll have your back – without passing judgment.
If you ever find out they’ve been revealing intimate details about you or your personal life, it can be extremely disheartening.
Not only did they breach your trust, but it plants a seed of doubt in your mind – a niggling feeling.
What else are they hiding?
5) Keep skeletons in the closet
Honesty is the best policy. We all know that. But what happens when someone is holding something back?
They’re not actively lying, they’re simply omitting the truth. But isn’t that just as misleading?
You start to wonder – do they trust you as much as you trust them? Or worse, are they as trustworthy as you first thought? In turn, that doubt creates distance between you both.
For a relationship to work, trust needs to go both ways. And in the same way that blabbing your secrets to strangers is bad, keeping their own, is equally shady. Some might say it’s downright deceptive.
Not only that – but it makes you feel undervalued as a partner and confidant.
Ultimately, without open and honest communication, your relationship is on shaky ground.
Loyal people know this, which is why they’re transparent about how they feel. They don’t keep secrets or hide their emotions from the people they love. Even if those thoughts, fears, or desires seem trivial or insignificant at the time.
But most of all, they don’t lie.
6) Be a liar, liar, pants on fire
Whether directly or indirectly, loyal people don’t lie. Instead, they value honesty and transparency above all else. Let’s face it. That’s a key ingredient of any healthy relationship.
So what happens if you catch your partner lying?
Well, trust is a tricky thing. It takes years to gain and mere seconds to lose. Just one tiny lie can obliterate any semblance of faith you ever had in your partner.
And once that trust is gone, it’s even tougher to get it back. Especially if that act of deceit is just one of many.
Again, it comes down to open and honest communication.
Not only must you be authentic and genuine with each other. But you need to discuss your boundaries. As well as be candid about what counts as a lie.
For some, bending the truth or telling a white lie to spare someone’s feelings is acceptable. For others, they need brutal honesty – even if it’s a hard pill to swallow.
Loyal people understand this. So instead of fibbing or being disingenuous, they’re upfront about how they feel – particularly when it comes to the important stuff.
What’s more, they address any issues head-on before lying is even necessary.
Something which brings us to the final behavior.
7) Or a two-timing charlatan
Last but certainly not least, cheating is not in their vocabulary!
That’s right. Not only are they honest to a tee, but you can bet your bottom dollar that they’ll never two-time you. It’s simply not in their nature.
In fact, if I asked you to name one thing a loyal person would never do – I’m sure you’d answer cheat!
That’s because loyal people take commitment seriously.
It’s this same behavior that keeps them faithful no matter what. Even when things are rocky or your relationship is on the outs, they’ll remain loyal until the end. It’s what they do best.
They have an unwavering moral compass. So the thought of betraying their partner’s trust by flirting or giving in to temptation wouldn’t even enter their mind.
To them, it’s not worth the risk.
