11 beautiful signs a woman finally recognizes her worth

I’ve been saying this over and over: Recognizing our inherent worth is a journey and we’re all at different speeds. 

Womanhood is difficult enough as it is yet the odds continue to be stacked against us. Is it any surprise why recognizing our worth takes such a long time?

We’re taught patience and endurance, to learn to grit our teeth in situations that do not serve us. We’re made to believe we have to shrink ourselves to make space for other people’s egos.

In the words of Warsan Shire, “And you tried to change, didn’t you? closed your mouth more / tried to be softer / prettier / less volatile, less awake”

But oh, once a woman steps into her power, it’s a beautiful thing. 

Once she sheds the shame of being unapologetically herself, the narrative begins to shift. 

Let’s talk about it. 

Here are 11 beautiful signs a woman finally recognizes her worth. Will the signs resonate?

1) She recognizes when to walk away

I’m a big fan of knowing when to quit. “Try and try until you succeed” is not a motto I subscribe to. 

There is power in knowing when to walk away, to leave a bad situation—or to leave before it even turns sour.

To be fair, we all have different pain and patience thresholds. Our bottom lines are different. 

And a woman who finally sees her worth, she who values her time and energy, will recognize that just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.

She has learned to be selective of where she focuses her energy. She leaves where she is not wanted or needed—that includes people, too (but more on that later.)

Gritting her teeth in unfavorable situations is being done at a slim to none rate. She protects her peace by walking away. 

2) She no longer participates in comparisons

A woman who knows her worth knows that she gains nothing from comparing herself to others.

It is a losing game, after all.

It is messy and unproductive, it sucks the fun out of socializing. It deters us from finding our power as a collective

Instead, she has learned to celebrate other women. She’s what you would call a girls’ girl. 

She claps for others. She lets other women shine, she celebrates them and with them.

She has learned that there is space for every woman so there’s no need to bring others down to bring herself up. 

She has learned this crucial fact: What’s yours is already yours, there’s no need to covet what isn’t. 

3) She has cut off unhealthy connections

Here’s a hard pill to swallow: Not everyone in your life will love to see you succeed.

Let that sink in a little bit, let’s stew in that for just a moment because some of y’all here need to hear it. 

And a woman who finally recognizes her worth needed to hear that at one point, too. And guess what, besties? 

She listened, even if it’s a truth no one likes to hear. 

However, the point is, it’s true. There will be people who would love to see you stay in the same place you’ve always been because that’s also what they do. 

It’s not so much as they don’t want to see you progress, it’s more that they’re uncomfortable being left behind. 

But you know what? That’s not your problem. 

In the same way that other people’s accomplishments aren’t yours to covet, other people’s insecurities aren’t yours to accommodate either. 

Read that one again. 

4) She now surrounds herself with like-minded people

Let’s look at #3 and #4 this way: Removing toxic connections allows space for healthier relationships to form.

A woman who knows her worth knows this. She’s done it and became aware of how tough it was yet also how rewarding.

She learned the value of “finding your people”.

5) She doesn’t play the victim

If she did before, not anymore. 

She no longer wallows in pity, she no longer plays the blame game.

She owns her power now, enlightened with the idea that no one can hurt her without her permission. She doesn’t give anyone that permission anymore.

She doesn’t give anyone that power anymore.

In the same breath, she’s accountable for herself, too. She’s accountable for that power (a lesson we all should learn.)

6) She has learned to say no

Say it with me: Boundaries.

She became comfortable with the magic word No. She became comfortable being unavailable to people.

She has learned AND respected her limits, gone are the days she let other people walk all over her bottom line. 

Now, she fights back. Now, she doesn’t ignore her discomfort. 

7) She doesn’t settle

embrace a child free life 1 11 beautiful signs a woman finally recognizes her worth

Settling has become a thing of the past. A woman who steps into her power is a woman who knows what she wants.

And even better, she’s the type who knows what she deserves. 

And that’s why she no longer settles.

She no longer satiates herself with the crumbs of attention and affection that others leave her with. 

She doesn’t settle for a relationship that makes her feel lonelier to be in, romantic or otherwise. 

She doesn’t settle for anything less than what she knows she is worth. 

Honestly? A power move. 

8) She is confident in her decisions

A woman who knows her worth is a woman who trusts herself and all the things she can bring to the table. 

She trusts her capabilities. 

She trusts herself to make the best decisions she can make at a given time. 

This isn’t to say that she will make all the right decisions, but she at least trusts herself to make the best one depending on the circumstance and given information.

9) She talks to herself kindly

A woman who has finally recognized her worth will treat herself with grace. 

Thinking badly about herself is now a thing of the past. You won’t catch her negatively talking about herself either.

She also will:

  • She will talk to herself kindly.
  • She will talk to herself the way she wants other people to talk to her. 
  • She will talk to herself with respect. 
  • She will remain kind in the face of making a mistake. 
  • She will treat herself the way she treats her loved ones. 
  • She will cheer herself on.
  • She will celebrate herself. 

10) She appreciates all that she used to be

I think growth is not about moving forward with a clean slate, I think growth is being able to transform the burdens of the past into something more worthwhile in the present. 

And a woman who recognizes her worth knows this.

She will forgive herself for all that she did not become, she will appreciate the past versions of her that fought to get her to where she is. 

She understands that surviving her past is not all she is, it no longer defines her. To speak metaphorically, it was but a chapter in her book, and it’s now time to turn the page.

Speaking of turning the page, it brings me to the last point which is being thankful for who she has become.

11) She is thankful for who she has become

And finally, she is thankful for who she has become… because let me tell you, it wasn’t easy.

The items on this list are things you can learn, yes, but learning is never a smooth journey. 

Even with the best intentions, the first step is always the hardest to overcome. And she overcame that. 

Why wouldn’t she be thankful? She has become the sum of her journey, and she’s still moving forward.

What if this isn’t me? 

The storybooks have told us about the rebirth of phoenixes, ascending from the ashes, and how the fire is the catalyst to a new life. 

We all have that, that survival, that not knowing if we’ll get to the other side intact. Life has a funny and infuriating way of letting us learn our lessons.

And boy, are these lessons tough. 

But women are made of even tougher things than that, right? I sincerely believe that all of us are capable of recognizing that. 

Some of us just get to recognize it earlier than others. For some, it just takes a little bit more time.

This isn’t a competition of who gets to fly higher anyway, this is a nest and we just all need to take our time until our wings are a bit more ready.

The right time is not the same for everyone.

There is no competition, there are no standards; there is only you, with a fire burning brightly in your chest.

And it’s there waiting for you to take that leap when you’re ready. 

Fly high, little Phoenix, fly.

Michelle Marie Manese

Michelle Marie Manese

M Manese is a part-time creative writer, illustrator, and full-time fangirl hoping to find her way within the Content space. She makes art here: @michellemmanese

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