11 warning signs you’re dating a serial monogamist

Ever been in a relationship and things are going great, but something just feels a little off?

Well, your partner could just be a serial monogamist. You ask, “What’s a serial monogamist?” Don’t worry, we’re here to clear the air.

Simply put, a serial monogamist is someone who moves from one relationship to another with little or no break in between.

It might seem like they are super committed, but it could also mean they’re scared of being single.

Let’s dive into 11 warning signs that you’re dating a serial monogamist.

1. They Move Fast

Is your relationship moving at lightning speed?

One minute you were having your first date and the next, you’re meeting their family and discussing future plans.

If it feels like things are moving faster than Usain Bolt, it could be a red flag.

Serial monogamists are often quick to commit because they are uncomfortable with being single.

They prefer the security of a relationship and want to lock things down quickly.

So, if you feel like you’re on a super-speed relationship roller coaster, you might just be dating a serial monogamist.

But remember, take your time to understand each other well before taking the next big step. 

2. Past Relationships Are a Mystery

When it comes to their past relationships, do they keep things vague and unclear?

A serial monogamist often avoids discussing their past because they usually have a long list of exes, and that can be a difficult subject to navigate.

If your partner is always changing the topic or being evasive when their past relationships come up in conversation, it could be a sign they’re a serial monogamist.

Open discussion about past relationships is healthy and important for understanding each other better. 

3. They’ve Never Really Been Single

I remember a time when I was dating this person, let’s call them Sam. Now Sam was a great partner, always caring, attentive, and committed.

But one thing that stood out was that Sam had never really been single.

From the stories they told, it seemed like they jumped from one relationship to another without taking a breather.

It was as if being single was a foreign concept to them. They’d go from sharing cute couple photos to being “heartbroken” and then suddenly, they’d be back in a new relationship.

If your partner’s timeline is similar, it could be a sign that you’re dating a serial monogamist.

Being comfortable with being single is crucial for personal growth and development, so it’s something to think about. 

4. They’re Always in “Relationship Mode”

These individuals are often in “relationship mode” – even when they’re not in one.

They are constantly scouting for potential partners and can never really enjoy the single life.

If you notice your partner is always on the lookout and never truly content without a romantic interest, it could be a sign they’re a serial monogamist.

It’s essential to recognize the value of individuality and enjoy life outside of a relationship too. 

5. They Fear Being Alone

It’s completely natural to feel lonely sometimes, especially after a break-up.

But for serial monogamists, the idea of being alone is not just uncomfortable, it’s downright terrifying.

They often equate being single with being lonely and unloved, which couldn’t be further from the truth.

If your partner seems to cling to you or the relationship due to a fear of being alone instead of genuine love and respect, it might indicate they’re a serial monogamist.

It’s crucial for both parties in a relationship to understand that being alone sometimes is healthy and it doesn’t diminish their worth or value.

6. They’re Always Talking About the Future

I recall dating someone who, from the very start, was always talking about the future. Let’s call her Jane.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am all for planning ahead and dreaming big. But with Jane, it was different.

On our second date, she was already talking about trips we could take next year, and by the fourth date, she had casually mentioned moving in together.

It felt like she was more in love with the idea of us being together than actually getting to know me.

If your partner is also constantly fast-forwarding to future plans, it might be a sign that they’re a serial monogamist.

Remember, it’s important to enjoy the present and take things one step at a time!

7. They’re Emotionally Dependent

Being emotionally reliant on someone else for your happiness? That’s not healthy, period.

A serial monogamist often leans heavily on their partner for emotional support and validation.

They find it hard to be independently happy or content without their significant other.

If your partner expects you to be their sole source of joy and comfort, you might be dating a serial monogamist.

It’s essential for everyone to find happiness within themselves and not rely solely on someone else for it.

So, if this sounds familiar, it might be time for a heart-to-heart chat about emotional independence.

8. Their Relationships Often Overlap

This isn’t about cheating, but rather about the inability to be single. Serial monogamists often have overlapping relationships because they can’t stand the emptiness that comes with being single, even for a short period.

If your partner went from their last relationship to being with you faster than a blink of an eye, it could be an indicator that they are a serial monogamist.

Remember, it’s important to give oneself time to heal and grow after a relationship ends before diving into another one. 

9. They Often Change Their Personality

In my dating history, there was a guy, let’s call him Nick. Nick was a chameleon.

Every time he entered a new relationship, his personality would change to match his new partner’s.

Suddenly, he’d love salsa dancing or become the biggest fan of indie rock!

It was like he adapted his personality to fit into his partner’s world rather than maintaining his own individuality.

If your significant other seems to do the same, molding themselves to perfectly fit into your life rather than sharing their true self, it could be a sign that they’re a serial monogamist.

Remember, it’s crucial for both individuals in a relationship to maintain their unique identities and interests!

10. They’re All About the “Honeymoon Phase”

The honeymoon phase of a relationship, filled with butterflies and rainbows, doesn’t last forever. It’s meant to transition into a deeper, more meaningful love.

However, if your partner seems to be addicted to that initial rush of love and starts getting restless when things begin to settle down, you might be dating a serial monogamist.

They often chase the thrill of new love, but struggle when it comes to maintaining a long-term relationship that requires work and compromise.

Remember, true love isn’t just about constant euphoria; it’s about sticking together even when the butterflies fade.

11. They Avoid Conflict Like the Plague

Alright, no one likes arguments and disagreements, but they’re a part of any healthy relationship.

They allow couples to resolve issues, understand each other better and grow together.

But if your partner avoids conflict at all costs or jumps ship at the first sign of trouble, it might indicate that they’re a serial monogamist.

They often prefer to start over with someone new rather than work through challenges.

Remember, overcoming conflicts together strengthens a relationship. So if your partner is conflict-averse, it might be time for a serious conversation.

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Picture of Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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