qualities of a strong woman

12 qualities of strong women that most men can’t handle

A strong woman: she’s the powerhouse that every girl wants to grow up to become.

She’s the woman every man wants to be with, but is often scared to approach.

The qualities of a strong woman shine out like brilliant rays of sunshine. Strong woman qualities inspire others and lift everyone else up.

The traits of a strong woman allow vulnerability and openness but also thrive on pursuing goals and independence. You may know women like this in your life and you may even embody these characteristics of a strong woman yourself.

Here are the traits of a strong woman that amaze and wow us all every day.

1) She is her own fighter

A powerful woman doesn’t need anyone else to fight for her. Not even close.

She fights for herself – and she wins.

Or else she learns from failure.

Whether it’s in her career or her personal life, a strong woman takes every experience and shapes it into something useful.

Victories are just stepping stones to even greater victories.

Setbacks are just rocket fuel for her next endeavor.

A strong woman’s package has clear instructions right on the front: no man required. She takes responsibility for her life and leans on herself. If a man comes along for the ride that’s great, but she’ll never expect him to fix all the problems in her life.

And she won’t let him run her business or tell her what to think and do.

This doesn’t mean she’s going to get mad if a guy opens a door or pays her a compliment. It just means the next time a guy treats her like she doesn’t know how to handle her business she’s going to handle his business. 

In relationships she wants a balance of power. Treat her right and she will be your biggest fan who lavishes attention and love on you. Treat her wrong and you won’t last long.

A strong woman knows what she’s worth and she doesn’t need anyone or anything to validate that for her.

2) She knows what she wants

A strong woman aligns her world with what she values and what she’s worth – and casts the things that drag her down aside.

One of the main characteristics of a strong willed woman is that she knows herself and has aligned her life values and goals together with her self-knowledge.

She goes after what she wants, whether it’s a promotion, a man or even a parking space.

And chances are that most times she gets it.

While other people make excuses or talk about their sad past or explain why someone else shouldn’t get the chance, the job, the guy, the house, the opportunity, the strong woman gets busy and gets it. 

The kind of formidable woman who makes men’s heads spin – and sometimes makes their hearts flutter – doesn’t rely on someone else to make what they want happen: she makes it happen.

Even if she’s really into a guy or a career opportunity or a future dream, one of the characteristics of a strong woman is self-sufficiency.

She will never depend on someone else to make her goal come true because she knows dependency is just asking for disappointment.

Teamwork and collaboration? Absolutely.

Hanging on the words and promises of someone else who might not follow through?

Absolutely not.

(Ideapod’s best-selling e-book Why Taking Responsibility is Key to Being the Best You is now on sale with a money-back guarantee and gives you all sorts of practical ways to achieve self-sufficiency and lasting success in life).

3) She respects honesty and vulnerability

At this point you might be envisioning an Amazon warrior clothed in untouchable armor who looks at mere mortals with disdain. You might be thinking: this woman sounds kind of … mean.

But don’t be fooled.

One of the striking characteristics of a strong woman is that she truly has compassion for those around her and has processed her own negative emotions as well.

She works on herself and she expects a lot of others, true.

But she’s also often one of the first people out there lending a helping hand during hard times. You can find her helping out at the food bank or launching an app to help people in their daily life.

She’s a helper and a hero to many.

She’s emotionally integrated and honest with those around her. She admits her shortcomings and deals with them head-on.

A strong woman isn’t a bully, she’s a partner and asset and friend.

She can help her friends and colleagues become better versions of themselves because she’s done it for herself and she continues to improve herself every day.

A strong woman is patient with the problems of others and does what she can to help. She doesn’t seek out arguments or conflicts: she’s a tide that lifts all boats.

She appreciates vulnerability in others and is vulnerable at times herself.

If you check out the characteristics of a strong woman quotes at the bottom of this article you will see that honesty and vulnerability are hallmarks of a strong woman when they are combined with strength and rock-solid inner drive.

4) She will not shy away from intimacy

A strong woman embraces intimacy and love. She appreciates what being close to someone has to offer and she knows that she has an enormous amount of affection and romance to share from her heart as well.

She knows what she wants and she’s ready to commit to someone who’s on the same page.

Despite her openness, the strong woman is not seeking out love in a needy way, nor will she ever let a player jerk her around.

She demands respect and love and she gives it in return.

If one man is not that guy?

Another one soon will be. That’s the truth.

A strong woman is a prize and the fact is that on a deep level men know this.

They can sense it in their core.

When a strong woman walks in the room and smiles the men know that a game-changer just took place because they can sense deep-down that this woman means what she says and has lots to offer to the right person.

A man hasn’t really done romance until he’s been with a strong woman.

5) She empowers the people she cares about

A strong woman empowers the people around her, especially her romantic partner.

And when it comes to men, she realizes that it’s not all about her. A relationship requires give and take and a strong woman is confident enough to give a man what he needs.

What is it?

The simple truth is that men have a built in desire for something that goes beyond love or sex.

Men have a biological drive to feel essential to the woman in his life. Feeling essential is what often separates “like” from “love”.

This biological drive compels men to provide for and protect women. He wants to step up for her, feel essential, and be appreciated for his efforts.

Relationship psychologist James Bauer dubs it the hero instinct.

James argues that men are not especially complicated; they’re just driven by primal instincts when it comes to women. We all know that instincts are powerful drivers of human behavior. James simply takes this a step further and applies it to the romantic behavior of men.

I don’t often pay much attention to new fads in psychology. However, I think the hero instinct is a compelling explanation for what drives men romantically.

No one is saying that women need a hero to take care of them. Today strong women are everywhere. They can change a tire, open their own jars, and fend for themselves in life.

While women may not need a hero, this doesn’t mean men still don’t want to feel like one.

That’s why it’s essential that women understand what the hero instinct is all about and how they can use it to their advantage.

Check out this free video by James Bauer. He explains what the hero instinct is really about and gives some tips to trigger it in your man.

Some ideas can be life changing. And for relationships, I think this is one of them. Here’s a link to James’ unique video again.

6) She may be a human lie detector

Lying to anyone is a bad idea, just as a matter of basic respect and to avoid getting caught up in all sorts of half-truths and nonsense.

But it’s an especially bad idea to lie to a strong woman.

If you don’t want to get humiliated in public or shown up as a liar in front of your friends.

Here’s why:

One of the characteristics of a mentally strong-woman is a built-in lie detector. She can see through male and female behavior immediately and very clearly and she’s no naive bunny.

The strong woman works every day on her negative aspects and aligning her goals with her core values.

She runs from feelings like shame and self-blame.

Any guy who tries to gaslight her or play a mind game to make her feel guilty about his problems won’t be able to get away with it.

It just won’t work. A strong woman knows.

characteristics of a strong woman strong woman

7) She needs integrity, respect and consistency

This is related to the last point. A strong woman knows what she’s worth and she doesn’t have time for two-faced people or those who want to manipulate and play with her mind or emotions.

She may be very interested in a guy at first, but if he flip flops like a frantic sea lion and starts acting fishy she’s going to respond by cutting ties.

A strong woman can be the most supportive person you’ve ever met.

And she will stick by you in hard times and comfort you during sad times.

But she will not put up with wishy-washy hypocrisy, disrespect and inconsistency. She can smell it a mile off and it’s just not her bag.

For some men this is intimidating, but for others it’s an inspiration to improve themselves. And the result is certainly worth it: a relationship with a strong woman is full of passionate love and real respect because there’s no wiggle space for excuses and lies.

8) She can be intense and hard to handle

Despite all the positives, a strong woman has often been forged in fire. Tough experiences in life and high expectations of herself have made her a caliber above. Even though she can be a lot of fun, she’s not necessarily the most easygoing person at all times.

She’s gotten through the ups and downs sometimes through sheer toughness and drive.

As mentioned, the characteristics of a mentally strong woman tend to be that she always speaks her mind and she won’t back down from a fight.

She’ll tell you her beliefs and she won’t apologize. She expects the same from the men in her life, which can be tough especially for some who may be more reserved.

She won’t sit there and stay prim and quiet when discussion of a controversial news item comes up or somebody says something outrageous: she’s made her way in life being up-front and direct and she will continue to follow her guiding star.

At the end of the day, patience and basking in her intensity will allow the strong woman to be fully appreciated. Chances are she’s an old soul and if you know a strong woman in your life or you are one then you’re well aware how much they can offer.

9) She knows her worth and yours too

A strong woman knows what she’s worth – and it’s far more than just monetarily or her outer career and accomplishments.

She is a master of seeing the value and potential in others too, and if you’re with her she will nurture that in you and encourage you.

But if you start sabotaging yourself and expecting her to come along and join the pity party, or you start undermining and manipulating her she’ll be the first to blow up the relationship bridge with TNT.

A high-value strong woman will then find someone else who values her as much as she values herself.

She knows what you’re worth and what she’s worth. If there’s reciprocity and respect that can be a glorious thing and she will love you to the moon and back.

But if you cross her or intentionally sabotage her life in some way?

Adios, amigo.

10) She loves unconditionally

A strong woman has willpower galore, but she is also highly-motivated by her heart and her love for those close to her. She will often find the best in those around her and show levels of patience and commitment to loved ones that surpasses other people.

She is the one checking on dad in the nursing home even after a busy day.

Or calling her friend who’s depressed even if she wants nothing more than a glass of wine and some soothing music.

For those who have unbreakable bonds with her or have earned her love she is their rock.

For the special man in her life she can also be the most loving person they’ve ever met. If you love her fully she will love you fully back and her love will be deeper than you can imagine.

11) She will show you who you are and what you can be

One of the most remarkable characteristics of a strong willed woman is that she instinctively grasps the value and potential of those around her.

She will be the ideal boss, building up and guiding those around her.

And she’ll be the one with new ideas and constant motivation.

She is the couch potato’s nightmare and the aspiring entrepreneur’s dream.

She is the man of action’s future perfect companion and the video game addict’s short-term girl who got away.

The strong woman is full of deep power and passion: she sees the best in those around them and challenges and encourages them to reach it.

She wants other to join her on the journey to bigger and better things.

If they don’t want to join she’s perfectly satisfied remaining single until she meets someone who gets what she’s all about.

12) She’s full of productivity and positivity

One of the most inspiring and uplifting things about a strong woman is that she’s an engine of productivity and positivity.

Even when things don’t go her way she pushes through.

And when she looks back at her day she got a lot done.

She’s positive during hard times and she produces results.

She’s a super-charged, super-woman of productivity and positivity.

What makes a strong woman?

A strong woman is made by her reaction to her circumstances including her upbringing and the core beliefs that guide her. No matter how hard or disappointing some situations have been, she pulls herself up and finds a way forward. The characteristics of a mentally strong woman include inner balance, determination, focus and relentless optimism.

A strong woman speaks her mind and sticks to what she knows is true: she doesn’t bend with social pressure or the opinions of others.

At the end of the day, a strong woman has a firm grasp on her own inner reality.

She doesn’t let outside events control her, she shapes and influences outside events.

How to know you are a strong woman

The first thing to mention here is that – real talk – if you’re a woman you’re strong.

To be the gender that gives birth and raises future generations as well as inspires all of us with generations of bravery, love, protection and support going back to ancient times is frankly humbling beyond belief.

Women deserve all the praise we can give them – and then some.

But to know if you’re that special super level strong modern woman who is blazing the trails of the future then there is one main characteristic you should look for.

That characteristic of a strong woman is self-sufficiency and personal responsibility.

She doesn’t let someone else write her story at any time: because she’s busy blazing a trail ahead and not relying on someone else to make her dreams come true – or tell her story on her behalf.

A strong woman tells her own story.

The truly strong woman knows that life will have major down times but she also has an absolutely unshakable ability to come back from hard times, find the joy through the pain and use her thoughts, emotions and vision to craft a better future.

A strong woman knows that:

Despite all the unexpected circumstances of her life …

Despite all the advice and criticisms she gets from family, friends and strangers …

Despite the doubts and fears that come up inside her at times …

She is the captain of her own soul and the writer of her own destiny.

Characteristics of a strong woman quotes

When it comes to characteristics of a strong woman quotes there are a lot out there: because many strong women have spoken their minds for us to hear and learn from!

Indeed, one of the chief characteristics of a strong-willed woman is being outspoken and not holding back on her views and experiences. These words can help us see just how much strong women have to bring to the table and guidance they can provide.

Let’s check out some quotes.

“She is a queen. Her soul is royalty.” -Adrian Michael

“She is kind but strong, and that is where so many mistake her. They interpret her kindness for weakness and force her to show her strength.” -Jmstorm

“And one day she discovered that she was fierce, and strong, and full of fire, and that not even she could hold herself back because her passion burned brighter than her fears.” -Mark Anthony

“Do not tame the wolf inside you just because you’ve met someone who doesn’t have the courage to handle you.” -Belle Estreller

Ready for some more strong woman wisdom?

“A strong woman is one who feels deeply and loves fiercely. Her tears flow as abundantly as her laughter. A strong woman is both soft and powerful, she is both practical and spiritual. A strong woman in her essence is a gift to the world.” -First Nations American proverb

“Women are like teabags. We don’t know our true strength until we are in hot water.” -Eleanor Roosevelt

“Doubt is a killer. You just have to know who you are and what you stand for.” -Jennifer Lopez

And remember:

“Each time a woman stands up for herself, she stands up for all women.” -Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou, now there’s a strong woman for the ages. Angelou rose up through an unimaginably difficult childhood including sexual assault and became a revered civil rights icon, woman’s champion, poet and writer who is still loved and looked up to by millions of people around the world.

She is the perfect example of a strong woman whose qualities of vulnerability, authenticity and deep truth spoken to power bring inspiration and empowerment to everyone around her and help society move forward.

Closing thoughts

By now in this article you’ve likely had some reactions and thoughts. The kind of strong woman described here is very real and she’s likely set off a process inside you along the following lines:

  • You’re a strong woman who’s thriving and you liked this reminder
  • You’re a woman who wants to become even stronger
  • You’re a man who wants to be the kind of guy strong women love

The truth is that our society needs more strong women – and strong men who value them and are ready for what they have to offer.

It’s a sad fact that many parts of the world today still oppress and exclude women, teaching them to hide and push down their inner light.

It’s a tragedy and a massive suppression of potential that makes the world a darker place for all of us.

And it needs to change.

One by one we can all do everything we can to embrace and celebrate the qualities of strong women and understand that even the times when it seems like they’re going a little bit overboard are just her inner star trying to shine. Strong women push us to become the best we can be.

Sometimes you just need some boundaries, and luckily there is help with that too, such as this guide with 5 steps for setting personal boundaries that actually work

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Tina Fey

Tina Fey

I've ridden the rails, gone off track and lost my train of thought. I'm writing for Ideapod to try and find it again. Hope you enjoy the journey with me.

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